my dad has bein diagnosed with brain cancer and he doesnt know that he might only have 2 mnths to live we all thought it was 1 tumore but apparently he has loads and could go at any moment knowin this is his last christmas is rippin me apart because im really close to my dad and i dont know how to cope i need him hes my best friend
2006-12-10 08:25:09 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Diseases & Conditions ➔ Other - Diseases
spend as much time with him as you can,tell him you love him,remember some very good times together.tell him how special it was when he did this or that for you.let him know he was a great father and your best friend.
i am so sorry you are going thru this,my heart goes out to you.i am a daddys girl too.
2006-12-10 08:30:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wish there was something simple I could tell you that would make you feel better. When my husband's lung cancer returned, it had spread all over including his brain, we found out 2 weeks before what would be his last Christmas. I know how much this is hurting you. Just try to make everything as normal as possible. Then at night, go into the bathroom, bury your face in your thickest towel and cry as much as you need to. I can say with almost certainty, that your Dad KNOWS. If he wants to talk, listen. There is a peace that comes over people when they are close to the end and that will come to your Dad. Unfortunately, you have to find your peace within, and you will; it will just take time. Talk to trusted friends, or I attended a grief recovery workshop after my husband died. Sometimes friends just don't know what to say, but being around people that have experienced what you have can be very rewarding. I pray that you find comfort and even though you know this will be his last Christmas, I pray that you & your Dad can still make some good Christmas memories this year.
2006-12-10 09:21:17 · answer #2 · answered by Kaye R 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel as my mother died of cancer almost a year ago and this will be my first christmas without her.
The only advice I can give you is that there is nothing you can do about it and that you have to get on with your life as best you can after your dad passes away.
Make the most of the time you have together now. It may not seem like it at the moment but things do get easier in time.
2006-12-11 21:10:09 · answer #3 · answered by Catwhiskers 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My father died when I was in my 20's and I miss him still. He also was my best friend and fishing buddy. I recently laid my mother to rest. The only thing I can tell you for sure is it WILL hurt and that you should tell him everything you always "thought" there would be time to say to him. Let him know how you feel, what you think and love him with everything you are and more. Ask him questions that only he can answer for you...what he wants you to know before he's gone (about the past, his memories, etc. ) Do not spend this time mourning for him...spend it "living" with him. There will be time to mourn when he's gone. Look to your friends, family and especially to the Lord when that time does come. But for now...make this the best Christmas ever.
May God bless you and yours at this very difficult time. May you find peace in having known such a wonderful man as your father. Hold his hand and help him let go when the time comes, his journey is not over...and neither is yours.
2006-12-10 21:54:59 · answer #4 · answered by singlesolitaire1957 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My heart goes out to you....... My Mum was diagnosed with 2 tumours in the brain (originally breast cancer) 2 months ago and has undergone 10 radiotherapy treatments. We nearly lost her 3 weeks ago because her steroids caused her to become diabetic and she went into a coma. She pulled through and although insulin dependant as a result is now home. We know that the cancer is not treatable and we don't know how long she has left with us. The prognosis is not good in this situation but I don't like to think of the negative. To be honest I am finding Christmas hard to deal with....I can't bring myself to write my christmas cards let alone do any shopping for presents. I need to make this a good Christmas for my Mum and I think you need to do the same for your Dad. Try not to think of this Christmas as his last.....that will make it so depressing. It may be reality but try to think positively and have a good time! You will get the strength from somewhere......keep strong! Hold on to each precious day you have left with your Dad. My thoughts and prayers are with you during this time!
2006-12-10 09:36:47 · answer #5 · answered by KAZ M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Keep on being his best friend. Do the things you have always done together, talk and laugh and cry.
He probably needs someone to talk to about how he feels but is afraid to upset you by talking about it.
It would be a hard conversation to start but would help you both (once you both stopped crying on each other's shoulders)
It is OK to be scared; remember he is too. He needs you as much as you need him so try not to pretend to be too brave, just be yourself, be real, let him know you love him.
Maybe ask him to write you a letter?
Sound crazy but it would be something you would always have to treasure in the future.
You will always have the memory of his love and friendship and you will survive because you are loved, now and always.
Reading other replies, I feel that lots of people are praying for you right now. I pray God gives you both strength and courage and strengthens your love for each other.
(By the way, its fine to be angry with God, if you believe and if you dont maybe the fact that strangers out here care about you and are wishing you comfort may help)
2006-12-10 11:02:53 · answer #6 · answered by cate 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am a Christian and am sure that God will never desert anyone who is at deaths door. It is the other end of life from birth and we all experienced that so why can we not accept that death is part of life and celebrate the life about to end rather than wallow in self pity. The Bible is not the only Word of God and I have taken great comfort fron the Sikh religion's Holy book the Sri Guru Granth Sahib. A daily reading of a random page is posted on the internet at Sikhnet & other sites
2006-12-10 08:41:13 · answer #7 · answered by jaskoran 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I understand some of what you are going through my dad is ill and waiting on a heart transplant. He was told he may only have 6 months to live. I live each day for each day and spend as much time with him as i can. I do things with him that make us laugh so that i can remember the good times. May god bless you and help you during your time of need.
2006-12-10 08:30:41 · answer #8 · answered by irishrosequeen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im so sorry to hear this sad news, you have to make the absolute most of the time you have left with your dad, tell him how much you love him & share your thoughts and feelings, hes probably just as scared about his illness. have the best xmas ever for him and spend time together playing silly games & sharing a glass of sherry. share your thoughts with your mum/family/friends, they will be sad too. you are not alone in all of this hunny you need eachother as a family to make it special for him. & above all if after christmas he passes away he will have the memory of a great xmas with a loving family with him & he will have a very very special place within your heart & memory which will stay with you for a lifetime. you are a loving kind daughter to your dad, he is lucky to have you as much as you are lucky to have him. XX
2006-12-10 22:45:21 · answer #9 · answered by Kerry A 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My thoughts are with you. I know exactly what you are going through, I have been there with my own father who died 10 years ago with Lung Cancer. All that you can do is to pray to god to give you strength, make your dad strong, don't let him weaken, talk to him, this will help him feel very comfortable and assuring that you can be there with him. Once again my heart goes out to you and your family at this very difficult time.
2006-12-10 09:01:25 · answer #10 · answered by CT 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋