Either by acting like a brat, ashing his head into the floor or walls and then saying 'oww", he'll even take his power wheels escallade and flip it over to make it look like he was in an accident and say "oww, momma", he has this tendancy to hurt himself to get my attention...WHY???
2006-12-09 19:37:48 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
To gertie...I dont smoke you retard, I am active DUH iam always out with my child.
2006-12-09 19:43:05 · update #1
Cuz your the mommy.. Sounds like a normal kid.. Hang in there you will miss these days..
2006-12-09 19:40:31 · answer #1 · answered by LA LA 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a learned behaviour, somewhere along the line he learned that the quickest and most sure way to get your attention was when he was hurt.
To change that pattern you will need to pay him lots of attention before he does silly things to try and seek it.
It's not your fault, mothers of young children always have too much to do but you need to set aside some time when you give him your undivided attention (very hard to do)
It sounds a little as if he is a very active child who needs a lot of stimulation, is he in a play group or something that would take the focus off you a little?
(you don't say how old he is)
2006-12-09 19:50:00 · answer #2 · answered by ? 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
ok...youre not gonna like this. ask yourself this question and admit it to yourself honestly...do you pay as much attention to him as you ought to? i know its hard, i am a stay at home mom and believe me these days get long and i only have one kid (4 year old boy) and i have to tell ya, he is only doing this to get your attention. he needs your love and approval but if you arent there for that then he will take ANY attention from you he can get.
if you can reschedule anything within your day to ensure that every day you can have mommy and son time and do something that he wants to do and enjoy i bet these fits will diminish. i also think that if you give a different respsonse to him when he tries to hurt himself that he might likely stop doing that too, but that coincides with the addition of having your mommy and son time. so what i mean by a different reaction is that when he is actually pretending to get a boo-boo and you know he's ok, you could just brush him off, let him know he is ok and destract him with another activity. one that will involve you or one that he can get into on his own.
if you are a single parent then i cant imagine how you get through a day if you dont have a support system. i am married but to a soldier in the army so he is obviously gone ALOT and know only slightly what a single mom goes through, so it is hard. you have to try and do everything with your kid that not everyone has too. for example, when my husband is here i can say i have an appointment i need to go to or do the shopping and run a few other errands and he can stay with our son, single mom's dont have that luxury if they dont have a suport system...so if you are in that situation then i feel for you, its hard to try and organize your already long days to try and squeeze something extra into but i bet if you do the mommy and son time he will feel a bit more special and cared for and the need for creating the negative attention from you will diminish.
2006-12-09 20:31:57 · answer #3 · answered by Jessy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He likes the kind of attention you give him when he has hurt himself for real and finds that if he does this, he gets your attention. My kids went through this. Once I realized what they were doing, I would look at them and then just go about whatever I was doing(once I knew they really weren't hurt). It broke the cycle of 'faking' to get my attention. They thought of other ways which were better. Not that you should ignore him, just that you don't make a big deal about him tipping over his car. Go pick him up and go on to other things. Once he is done and not doing it, pay attention to him in a positive way. Give him a big hug or tickle and tell him you love him. Children need our attention more than we like sometimes, but never give in to negative kinds of attention- getting stunts. It isn't healthy. To a child, attention is attention, is attention. They don't know the difference. You have to direct him to the healthy kind.
2006-12-09 19:55:59 · answer #4 · answered by Twisted Maggie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have not already, participate more in the activities that interest him. Turn off all outside distractions, get down on his level and just interact with him. Do varied activities that are within your physical and financial means. If available in your area, get involved with play groups with children close to his own age range. Sometimes just sitting and listening to a child will reassure them that they are not being ignored or pushed aside.
2006-12-09 19:57:11 · answer #5 · answered by Illuminated 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's his way of asking you to show him more love or something. Where is his dad? Maybe he wants a man's attention and love also. My parents struggle to show us love. Although we never do things to get attention we try to do very good in EVERYTHING so that we can get a little praise. Maybe you do not even realize that you are not showing the love you feel for him. I mean, I know they love me, but they do not know that they do not SHOW it.. Just be attentive about that. Try lighting up when he enters the room and just let him feel special. Tell him that you are so proud of him and love him and he is special. and so.
2006-12-10 02:05:01 · answer #6 · answered by Ann 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
active or on the go?
maybe you should have grown up a little BEFORE you had a kid.
this is what they DO.
get over yourself and raise your child, little girl. if you can't seem to manage it then i'm sure there are lots of families who would love the CHANCE to.
concider yourself BLESSED to have him.
sounds to me like the kid has no structure in his life. how about mom? doesn't sound like she has much structure either, being out all the time, how could she?
2006-12-10 01:11:23 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well because you are his mommy, the light of his life, usually the one person that can make the boo-boos go away, the person that they seek comfort from when feeling sad or hurt.
As my mother says "Enjoy it now, because someday they are going to grow-up and not want to have a damn thing to do with you besides when they want something."
2006-12-09 19:55:34 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
becase u always give him your attention. if your aware of your childs actions then you know when he is hurt or in need. if you dont sweat the small stuff and let him do aht he does and dont baby him then he will learn that every time he has an action you will not have a reaction.
2006-12-09 19:51:07 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's a kid. That is what they do. LOL
Just take a break, if you can, when you feel that you are loosing it with him. I know it can be hard, but just try to.
Just try to be consistant with him, and stick with it. Even when he is "acting like a brat".
2006-12-09 20:07:26 · answer #10 · answered by LittleMermaid 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋