My depression has left me feeling NOTHING but empty and experience no pleasure, is there hope to feel again???

Question

I'm bi polar, and two and a half years ago, I experienced the worst depression of my life. I am currently taking 2 different medications - one for depression and a mood stabilizer, my depression has improved a great deal, but my life has no meaning anymore, and I can no longer find pleasure in anything, no interest in anything. Since my depression, I started having panic attacks and am afraid of just about everything these days. I even had to give up my car because of all of the anxiety is was causing me. I used to be almost a workaholic, but now I can't even work!!! Just the thought of turning in a resume or job application creates such anxiety that I can't even make a resume or fill out an application.
At times I am soooo numb from my depression that I can't even cry, other times I cry over the silliest things and can't stop. I see a psychiatrist, a counselor, and support group, nothing helps.Has anyone else been here???, and lived to see light again?? PLEASE HELP I'm sinking fast..

Answer 1

I'd have a good look at the prescribed medication. I don't know much about bi polar personally, i am suffering post traumatic stress disorder, big difference i know but why are you seeing all these people if nothing helps? I have seen people with bi polar heavily reduced due to the medication their taken. Personally i don't think you need it. With my experience with the medication i was really drained and unstable. How do you feel after a cry? Do you really need the mood stabilizer? When was the last time you had a deep and emotional thought/talk all to yourself? Do you know you? Feel free to Email me about anythink, would love to talk more. Wish all the best for you...It's been a long road for you already and not a easy one.

Answer 2

As someone who has been there before, yes, there's hope. First, you need to go to another doctor.

Doctors in this country are very much now doing psychiatric work, and they all run in the same school of thought. It's likely the people that were referred are people that the doctor knows, and likely agrees with their method of treatment. And the cycle goes on.

Aside from going to a different doctor and getting a second opinion (which I can't stress enough - this is your health!), exercise and a change in diet is incredibly helpful.

Try walking for 5 minutes a day. Nothing strenuous. If you have the stamina, increase it when you feel like it. Also consider increased intake of varied fruits - one thing that really helped was cottage cheese and blackberries first thing in the morning with water. Those two things themselves did a huge turnaround, on top of an excellent support from a psychiatrist and a very understanding doctor.

To give you an idea of how bad mine was, after three years of dating I proposed to my girlfriend, I sobbed uncontrollably that night and didn't leave the house for several weeks. There was a long bout of untreated depression, and preparing to propose to her kept my mind off of my despair, but once I lost that crutch I completely lost it mentally.

It's not will power. It's a matter of resigning yourself to doing these small things.

As for me, I'm happily married, expecting my first child, and have been off the medication for a long while now.

There IS a light at the end of the tunnel. Don't feel pressured to do more than one or two things at once. You tackle that first thing, the rest comes naturally over time.

Answer 3

Yes i have been there several times. The thing is you can not give up on getting better. No matter how bad you think it is, or how you are not having any interst in anything. You just have to keep seeing the people you are seeing and keep working to go forward, it really does work. At times you may slept back and feel the same again, but you will go forward again , if you try to , It will actually get easier, and easier. I did not think that could happen, but it did, and it still does. Just keep learning as much as you can about yourself, and learn something every day. You will find that if you take the good or bad things, that you can find some thing good that you have learned from them. Depression is like that.. just keep on working on it. You can get books on how to float through aniexety and that too, I did, and in time you just learn to let it go, and let it float over and away from you, and you will get back to a life, that you can enjoy. Just keep working with the people you are, and keep trying for yourself to get forward, and out of the depression you are in. It really works, and there is a life after, you can see the light again. So please do not give up on yourself.

Answer 4

See if your doctor will put you on a new combination of meds. There are many types of anti depressants and mood stablizers. It took trying several different combinations of meds before my doctor and I found the right combo. When you change meds you won't feel so hot the first week or so. But after that you should feel better or you need to try something else. There is hope for you. I was hospitalized 4 times in 05 due to depression. In November 05 I finally got the right meds and 06 has been the best year of my life. Take care.

Answer 5

Yes, been there done that. The fact that you are feeling "numb" is a bad sign and may require you to change the dosage of your medications. I also have panic attack and anxiety issues. They have medication for that as well. There is light at the end of the dark tunnel you feel you are in. Hang in there! Get an appt with your psychiatrist for a possible change in medication. Sometimes just a little change in meds can do wonders. It sucks, I know, and you feel sick and tired of it literally. But it will get better.. Just keep at it. Mention the anxiety being a major factor in your recovery. That may change things for you. If you feel like you cant wait for an appt with your doctor. Check yourself into a mental hospital. they have to keep you for three days anyway...So that will get your doctor in gear. And also keep you in a safe environment until you can get well. If you feel you can't even do that...confide in someone close who knows you to stay with you until you can get everything straightened out.
Don't give up! EVER....I plan to leave this world kicking and screaming..Don't let this disease take you from what you deserve.

Answer 6

You poor dear, something is not right either with the meds or counselor or both, wish you see a Dr here, I would recommend the Mirth and Meyer Clinic, the have an patient hospital, and out patient clinics all over, and have written many books on bi polar,depression and anxiety, they are Christian and very educated, an expert in their field. Other then that do you have a church, your pastor and church members could help also. Prayers do help a lot. Take care and may God Bless You.

Answer 7

I'm sorry you have to bear this terrible illness the rest of your life. But remember it's a chemical imbalance & it's not your choice. You just may not have found the right meds yet that will work best for you. My husband is bi polar as well & at times I just want to leave & give up. But like I told him, we'll take it one day at a time. When we 1st wake up we ask God to get us through today, just today. We're trying to train ourselves to view everything as positively as possible. It doesn't happen overnight or quickly. It's a day to day job. Make sure your psychiatrist understands how you're feeling physically & let him know your meds may not be working.Good luck.

Answer 8

I've been there. I've never been bi-polar but I know what you are going through. I was unmotivated, stressed out, depressed, and uninterested. We all go through it, you aren't alone. You need to just suck it up and get into things that you love. If you love work, you just have to suck it up, turn in that job application and do what you love. Find out things that you are interested in. Do those things. Find friends that you know will care about you and what you have to say, but also ones that you can care about what they have to say, too. Be social. Having someone there for you and being there for someone else is the best thing you can do. Don't let your anxiety get the best of you. Don't let it make your decisions for you. Take control of your life and suck it up.

Answer 9

Music of choice and a soothing cup of hot tea and just relaxe in a comfortable chair or a hot tub of water, meditate or pray, pretend all your problems, fears or sins go down that drain from your body as you let it out, and start everyday fresh. Make yourself a list of minor, obtainable goals such as vacuum the living room, dust kitchen shelves, etc. And maybe think about a hobby, like sketching or painting or something, it helps, even if you destroy the artwork afterwards.

Answer 10

God is not just an experience, he is an eternally unlimited entity. When you believe in God you're just putting it out there that you think there more to life that whats on earth and we share a common creator. Feeling God has to be a miraculous experience where a sudden realization comes to you from within; the silent voice of God speaking to you.