My boyfriend loves me very much but he is very jelous.I love him too.I think he doesnt bealive me and I never even look at any other boy.What should I do?!
2006-12-09 08:28:27 · 23 answers · asked by Emma 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Dump him...its only gonna get worse...the only reason guys are jealous is because they are cheaters and subconsciously know what they are doing is wrong so they accuse you of doing it all the time. Trust me im a guy! Do you want to spend your life with someone who questions you all the time or someone who trusts you and just loves you and believes everything you say and do? Im sure you gonna choose to stay with him but don't let insecurity keep you from being happy. You have the power to find someone good...not some Jealous Jerk who will never believe you and stresses himself out wondering what you are doing. You only live once. Remember that.
2006-12-09 08:31:57 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Just level with him, give him an ultimatum or something.
If you pander to his insecurity by limiting what you say and do in front of him, you will never make progress.
An old partner of mine was the most jealous, spiteful, cruel person I could ever have the misfortune to waste a major part of my life with. Telling me how to talk, asking me loaded questions about why I chose to wear the clothes I was wearing etc. Accusing me of cheating just because I would mention a member of the opposite sex in a sentence. Even accused me of being a potential cheat because I said something slightly flattering about a member of the same sex- I'm not even gay for heaven's sake!!!
Because I really felt like I was in the wrong, I used to change my personality. Talk different, act different, wear different clothing, thinking they would stop critisizing me.
It made things worse. Because they felt they could push me around and had a hold over me, they pushed their luck even more. In fact, absolutely everything they were accusing me of, they didn't think twice about doing. Hypocrite!
Absolute hell. Wish I'd ditched them at the first sign of trouble.
Tell your boyfriend he is upsetting you. That you love him, adore him and have eyes for no one else, but the way he treats you is making you feel hated and is deeply disrespectful.
If he doesn't buck up his ideas, treat him the same way.
"Have you been seeing other girls?"
"Why are you wearing that shirt? Are you trying to make someone fancy you?"
"Have you called any girls today?"
Maybe when the boot is on the other foot, he'll realise how pathetic he is being.
2006-12-09 08:41:22 · answer #2 · answered by midsojo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to talk to him. Reassure him that he's the only one you love and he's the only one that you want be with. Tell him how he should TRUST you because his lack of faith and trust in you will ruin the relationship in the long run. Often jealous people are insecure deep down. So, try to find out the root of that insecurity and be understanding. Sometimes, its in their nature to be overly jealous, then you just have to accept him for who he is or move on. Good Luck!
2006-12-09 08:40:52 · answer #3 · answered by mzlin08 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The jealous behavior is a sign of a controlling personality. It won't get better. It is less about trust than it is about control. The more you try to convince him that you are not cheating the more you will curtail all activities that trigger his jealousy, like going out with your friends. He gets jealous so you'll stop, then there is talking to your friends on the phone, He gets jealous so you won't do it where he can hear you. Do see the pattern? Dump him now before it is too late.
2006-12-09 08:35:10 · answer #4 · answered by PRS 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Dump him, thats not love, love is never jealous or unkind. If he hasn't already accused you of cheating, trust me he will. The accuser is usually the one who is cheating, thats where they get the paranoid tendencies and jealousy from. By staying with him you are only prolonging the inevitable. What you feel is probably based more on his flattering you with his attention and jealousy....thats not love.
2006-12-09 08:35:39 · answer #5 · answered by WitchTwo 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i can relate to what you are saying, because when my husband and i were dating he was very jealous, i finally told him that , that behavior had to stop otherwise we would not be together. i told him that if i wanted to be with other guys i wouldn't be in serious relationship with him. he explained to me that women he dated in the past had cheated on him, which in turn made him insecure. so with communication and understanding he managed to get over his jealousy. good luck to you!
2006-12-09 08:38:53 · answer #6 · answered by jdchick48 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hello Emma,
If this is bothering you too much then you need to break up with him. Maybe this isn't a manipulation thing with him and he is just paranoid about losing you. If that's the case, he will learn to ease up or get out.
--Rick
2006-12-09 08:37:48 · answer #7 · answered by rickrudge 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You can't have a relationship without trust and jealousy is a definite lack of trust. Relationships like that are more trouble than their worth. Get rid of him!! Believe me, he will never change!!!
2006-12-09 08:33:43 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
jealous behaviour will destroy a relationship!
everything it comes in contact with.
you need better communication with each other before its to late.
sit down with him tell him how it makes you feel and what you want,ask him how he feels and what he wants .
try that for starts and go from there.happy holidays
2006-12-09 08:40:43 · answer #9 · answered by marshall m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
let him know that you understand how he feels and you are sorry that he has to think like that.. but you just want him to know that he's the only guy you'd want to look at the rest of your life.. that no other guy means anything to you.. and to look around at other people is just something that everyone does, and tell him that you even look at girls too and you wonder why that doesn't bother him... good luck and best wishes!
2006-12-09 08:34:51 · answer #10 · answered by ~broken~ 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋