One of my best buddys mentioned to me to ask me how to deal with a situation with his girl friend.. I was unable to help him with this because i just never was in this sort of situation but anyone who may let me know because i want to help him out a bit, hes a bit of a wreck about what she has told him.. Well, he just started seeing her about a month ago, and yesterday night when he confronted her on a question, she hesitated and responded that it takes her more time to let her self connect with a person. She told him how a long time ago she was raped, now he called me all histerical because he doesnt want to let this ruien his relationship but doesnt see how it couldnt. I told him to ask her questions about it and try to make her feel comfortable but she didnt want to answer his questions.. was that bad advice for me to give him? i just figured that maybe he would want to know a little bit about what happened and not be in the dark about it.. so anyone who has dealt with any girls who
2006-12-09 07:37:40 · 5 answers · asked by re33b9 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
There are many reasons your friends girl won't talk to him about the rape. She could feel ashamed or some how responsible for what happened to her. Also because he is a man, she may not feel that she can totally trust him because in most likelihood it was a man who hurt her (women can rape other women too) and in some way she associates her boyfriend with her rapist. Even if she received help when it happened, she could probably benefit from help now. Your friend should be considerate of her feelings and that she needs time and not pressure her. A month is not a long time in terms of a relationship. Even people who have no history of sexual assault sometimes need more than a month to totally warm up to somebody.
2006-12-09 07:48:14 · answer #1 · answered by CAITLIN 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A rape is a really hard thing to go through and it feels like you are going through it alone! Nothing anyone can say or do that can help or even make you feel comfortable, someone violated you against your will, and thats something that you can never get back or forget about! If he prys and asks too many questions then it could make her more uncomfortable then anything. You already feel like a guy is never going to look at you the same, so by him asking questions it puts her feelings in a really hard place. She may in time eventually tell him, but leave it up to her to tell him, he just needs to be there for her and not ask, she may give him more details in time.
2006-12-09 07:45:39 · answer #2 · answered by Beautiful disaster 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG!!! SHE DOESN'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!!!!! Just tell him all he can do is be there for her. he can't push her to open up, because of what happen. And if she does ever want to talk about it then she'll come to him.
2006-12-09 07:43:05 · answer #3 · answered by kek_319 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes people who've had traumatic experiences don't want to talk about it. Tell your friend to tell her that he's ready to talk when she is, and not to push her to talk about it.
Best Wishes,
LB
2006-12-09 07:41:02 · answer #4 · answered by Love Bites 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when she is ready to talk she will. just tell him not to push for anwsers.
2006-12-09 07:48:13 · answer #5 · answered by punk girl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋