Ok i dont know if anyone read my last question about the phone situation, but i have been with my boyfriend for sometime now, and im always picking at him for doing things, although the funny thing is i know its very silly, ie the few female numbers he had in his phone i went in a mood, and not to mention im always being nasty and saying its over, the reason im so nasty is sometimes i feel i dont gain anyhthing from my relationship and the problem is i keep bringing things up and his getting sick of me asking the same questions, i think half the time its all in my head, i can see this guy thinks alot of me as he is very kind!!! and he often gets very upset when i say i have had enuff, i feel like i cant trust because of past relationship and there is always doubt his up to something ie the silly numbers in his phone, i feel i have lost my cool/control and im constantly thinking negative thoughts,why cant i just forget + have a laugh with him,anyone been in this situation? any tips?
2006-12-09 07:20:35 · 10 answers · asked by ice_castles 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Wow i thought i was the only one that went through this. First thing u need to do is stop comparing him to past relationships. Its going to distant him away from you and the more u do that the more ur head will play tricks on you. Instead of being negative towards him try picking out the positves in him. Look for what made u fall in love with him the first time. Try to do things with him(either things he likes or things u like). You might feel u dont gain anything because ur thoughts are all negative. If through all this he is still there, that should tell you something.
Slowly i began to not fight with him on stupid things. I started to go out more with him, say nicer things to him, and now im happily married for 4 years now. Unless u have a reason a good good reason to doubt him in anyway then i would say for you to leave him but i think u r just thinking too much of past relationships that u r not able to enjoy this one. enjoy it girl, he's still there. Good luck, i hope it works for u like it has for me.
2006-12-09 07:33:58 · answer #1 · answered by gonzalezleon3022 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have the same problem. Like you, I'm not secure about my present relationship, I can't trust in his real intentions, because of past relationships which were very painful. It is really hard, but you have to trust your boyfriend for your own sake. If he is nice to you and treats you right, so forget the phone numbers. He has his own life and female friends as you have your life and male friends, right? So, stop asking the same questions or saying the same things, he can get fed up with you very soon. Be trustful and smile!
2006-12-09 15:31:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, the big tip was "i feel i dont gain anyhthing from my relationship". If you feel that way, you shouldn't be in that relationship. It might be best to just be friends for a time, until you figure out what it is you want from the relationship. It sounds as though you are jealous, of what I don't know. You say he "thinks a lot of [you] as he is very kind". If you aren't sure what you want. get out!
Best Wishes,
LB
2006-12-09 15:26:57 · answer #3 · answered by Love Bites 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You answeered your own question when you mentioned you can't trust because of your past relationship(s). You have got to let the past go . If you have been with this man for a while now , something must be right. Make an effort to stop yourself from being so negative and let your guard down a little and allow yourself to see what is good about your relationship with your boyfriend. Sometimes when a person keeps getting accused of doing things he isn't doing , he may go ahead and do them because it's assumed he doing them already! Love is a wonderful thing but it does mean we have to allow ourselves to be vunerable . Past events sometimes make us weary of trusting again but we have to if we are ever going to be happy.
2006-12-09 15:32:06 · answer #4 · answered by margie c 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
relationships r always like this u first go out then u like each other alot then u overly like each other then u guys lose friends cuz u like each other to much then u break up then go back out then the girl always start these things called "nothing fights" and ruins everything she only does it cuz shes bored
2006-12-09 15:23:26 · answer #5 · answered by Doss 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you wrote WAY too much. I stopped reading after the third line! what's wrong with you? this is why you're having guy problems!
2006-12-09 15:23:26 · answer #6 · answered by in_my2ndlife 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if its bothering u drop him,but if u want him to stay with him talk to him about ur feelings. If u feel hes not listening well then its time for u to toughen up
2006-12-09 15:27:27 · answer #7 · answered by flavagirl711 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Give it to him good and he will forget all the other girls for sure! ROCK his world baby!
2006-12-09 15:23:12 · answer #8 · answered by IT'S JUST ME ! 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you guys obviously aren't meant for each other. you are too controlling, and he is not open enough to you. therefore you should probably split up.
2006-12-09 15:23:20 · answer #9 · answered by holyitsacar 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
you should leave him, he's too good for you anyways
2006-12-09 15:24:27 · answer #10 · answered by Erikawithasmile 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋