My girlfriend and I have lived together for almost 6 months now in which time we have bonded very close to each other and became sucessful....she has some guy friends that shes hangs out with but yesterday neglected to call me and let me know... I got irritated by this cause it was first of all disrespectful and thoughtless....She thinks im jealous of the guys and that may be right but im more concerned about the unacknowledging me... just looking for some opinions on how to handle it and try to go on.....ne
2006-12-09 06:36:09 · 27 answers · asked by proofskateboards 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
They are shagging her
2006-12-09 06:38:40 · answer #1 · answered by John Scary 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did you have plans? You live together so is it a requirement that you both keep tabs on one another? If you had plans that is not very thoughtful on her part. You need to talk and figure out each of your expectations.
The best relationship, in my opinion, is freedom to do what we want, along with mutual respect and prpoper communication. My man knows all my male friends that I had before we got together and vise versa.
If you are never invited along , that speaks volumes. I'd rethink this relatonship. You have a choice and only you can know the details of your life with this gal. Maybe you should live apart?
It's all give and take. You should be involved in her social life as she should yours, but at the same time have your own lives independant of one another. We all need time apart.
I doubt she's "shagging" all these other dudes. Men and women can be friends without screwing each other. Just talk to her and tell her how you feel.. Hold your ground, be strong and set some boundaries if you want this thing to work. Good Luck!
2006-12-09 09:03:52 · answer #2 · answered by Jen 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Girl was in the wrong if you 2 have decided to give a call to one another about your whereabouts then she should have called. If you jealous of the guys she is going out with then the both of you need to address this and let her know where you stand so she will know and its up to her if she wants to help you with that or just totally ignore your feelings. If she ignores your feelings then I am sorry for you. Women totally have guy friends but if they are in a relationship then they need to be considerate of the other person. Maybe she wants you to think that there is something going on or maybe there is. Be careful of your feelings and what you say b/c she can be Innocent.
Do you really know she was with them or was she just with one of the guys.
Girl shouldn't be keeping secrets if you guys are together.
Why weren't you invited. You don't have to go every place she goes but she could have invited you. Trust is very important without that you guys are not going to make it.
Yall really need to talk about this before it goes further.
Good luck
2006-12-09 06:42:47 · answer #3 · answered by Clara 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone needs their space from the relationship. Just because u two have moved in together doesn't mean she's supposed to change all of her ways. Now, I believe that you are more jealous than you are concerned about her not calling. Just be honest with yourself. Have you ever been out with your gf and her guy friends. That may help elevate some of your worries. You also may find that your in the right to be jealous because vibes tell a lot.
2006-12-09 06:43:40 · answer #4 · answered by curious 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ok dude, seriously. Are you her dad or something. She lives with you for cryin out loud. I mean yea, sure, it would have been nice for her to call to let you know. BUT she's not your wife. AND even if she was, she doesnt have to answer to you. She can go anywhere, with anyone, without your approval. Yes, out of consideration most couples dont go that far but oh well. She doesnt have to call you whenever she goes out somewhere... and same with you. You dont have to call her everytime u go out somewhere. On some level, you are jealous that she has some guys friends and she hung out with them away from you. But get over it. Just because their guys doesnt mean anything. So chill out and enjoy your relationship, if you keep this up where U THINK she has to always tell u where she'll be, then your not going to have a relationship much longer, Good Luck
2006-12-09 07:32:54 · answer #5 · answered by Ash420Granito 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ask yourself this: would you have been so upset by this if it had of been a female friend she went out drinkin' with? One time and she didn't call, so what! Even as her boyfriend, not EVERYTHING is about you. She doesn't have to report every little thing she does to you. If this incident is no big deal, then it should be easy for you to "handle and try to go on". Jealousy can be cute sometimes, but it can be a realtionship-killer if you don't get it in check!!
2006-12-09 06:51:17 · answer #6 · answered by baybeegrl5 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like, well you know, but you don't want to admit it.
Every woman that I've known that hangs around a lot of guys when she has a boyfriend is usually cheating, unless they're around 22 and younger... and still. Just start hanging around women a lot and being friends with them. Don't get jealous.
What's funny is the women's answers saying she don't have to answer to you, but if the roles were reversed, the women's answers would be 'dump his sorry butt'.
2006-12-09 06:42:19 · answer #7 · answered by Nep 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well frankly it would be nice if she did call you and let you know that she was going to go out after work. That is very disrespectful........but also, she probably neglected to tell you because she may have thought that you might try and tell her no, or start and arguement or something of that sort. She doesn't have to answer to you, you are not married. But out of respect you should trust that they are friends, and she should have called to let you know she wasn't going to be home right away
2006-12-09 06:42:58 · answer #8 · answered by Beautiful disaster 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
OK WELL I KNOW IT IS POSSIBLE FOR HER TO HAVE JUST GUY FRIENDS CUZ I DO. AND ITS NOTHING MORE. BUT IF I WAS IN A RELATIONSHIP YES I WOULD LET MY BOYFRIEND KNOW BEING THAT I WOULD WANT HIM TO DO ANYTHING LIKE THAT BEHIND MY BACK. AND MAYBE EVEN ASK HIM HE WANTED TO GO TO MEET MY FRIENDS IF THEY ARE JUST FRIENDS. BUT IT COULD BE POSSIBLE SHE THINKS YOU WILL PROB GET REALLY UPSET IF SHE LETS YOU KNOW THAT SHE WANTS TO GO OUT WITH THE GUYS. BUT THEN AT THE SAME TIME ITS NOT GOOD TO KEEP SECRETS. I GUESS THE ONLY THING TO DO IS JUST TALK TO HER ABOUT IT, ASK HER WHY SHE DIDNT TELL YOU. DONT ARGUE CUZ THAT WILL MAKE IT WORST. JUST BE OPENED WITH ONE-ANOTHER THAT WILL BE THE ONLY THING THAT MAKES YOUR RELATIONSHIP WORK. JUST LET HER KNOW WHAT YOU DONT LIKE AND ASK THE SAME FROM HER. THAT WAY THE TWO OF YOU CAN WORK ON THE DISLIKES.
GOODLUCK
2006-12-09 06:50:43 · answer #9 · answered by LiL MaMa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not the best behaviour - I understand you not liking it. My girlfriend would do the same to me but after a brief talk about it we agreed that if she or I go out and it was unexpected then even just a quick text message would be enough.
2006-12-09 06:47:37 · answer #10 · answered by curiousone 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she lives with you, does she really have to call you and tell you everytime that she goes somewhere? It makes you seem a little bit clingy. You get to see her everyday, so she should be able to go and hang out with her guy friends without you expecting a call. She should at least say "hey im going out with my guy friends" or "yeah i went out with my guy friends last night"...but she is not obligated to call.
Would you be this stressed out if she forgot to call and was out with her girlfriends?
Maybe it is a jealousy issue that you need to work through.
2006-12-09 06:38:40 · answer #11 · answered by GirlInMassachusettTOWN 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋