When a woman says no, does she really mean yes?

Question

When a woman says no, does she really mean yes?

Answer 1

Yes and no.

Answer 2

I cam accross an intersting article on how women communicate. Although some of the information is useful on this website here, I find it hard to believe that all of these generalizations could possibly be true for EVERY WOMAN. On one page, the author claims that woman see the attitude behind the behavior, and is more concerned with this than with the action itself. Although I don't doubts this is true with most women most of the time, it is also conceivable that the intention behind the action could be misinterpreted. Lets say that you opened a door one time for a woman in order to get appreciation, but later on you just did it out of habit. Or lets say that you did it to show you cared. The first one overweighs the other two, and thus your behavior may be criticized. I know because this has happened to me. Our intentions behind our behaviors with anyone male or female are always subjective, because we are constantly evolving in the way we percieve the circumstance, or even the world itself. This creates complex processess in relationships, because one day we may be reading a book that deals with becoming successful, and just because we have read this book and quit our job, in the past, this is not necessarily a sign that we are planning to quit our job in the present. But many women takes the "past equals the present" approach, which if you really look it at, is not entirely true. If it was the case, than people could never learn from anything. "The past neither equals the present, nor the future." And any subtle sign, could be misinterpreted by anyone. A "no" may mean "yes"; in one context, or under strict rules, but peoples rules of communication and relating are ever evolving. You may say "you're sorry." and hear your lover say "prove it." But if she decides later to change her expecations, the apology itself may be enough. This is the great irony of communication, peoples rules for effective communication are never consistent. They are relative upon timing, circumstance, mood, training, intent, and decisions. So to ask if a woman means "yes" when she says "no." Just think back at a time, when you said "no," but meant "yes" just to test the other person. I am sure if you are past twenty, you've had at least one experience such as this. The anser is in the obvious. "Sometimes." And "It depends on a number of variables, such as who the woman is, what her values and belief systems are, and what drives her to make the choices she makes."

Answer 3

It all depends on what meaning "she" gives to the word "no" at the moment. What meaning you give the word is irrelevant.

It's possible that some women have a "rape" fantasy of some sort. In other words, saying the word "no" when they really mean "yes," gives more intensity to their sexual gratification. I met a woman like that many years ago. She explained that she had never reached a climax with her husband, and went on to say that the only time she ever climaxed during sex was when a guy broke into her bedroom and forced her to have sex with him. To me, that's a woman who has discovered that she has a rape fantasy. Incidentally, my relationship with her lasted one day. I was worried that she was a basket case.

If your girlfriend or acquaintance is turned on by such things, and you find that you just can't do without her, you'd nonetheless better be damned sure that you have some valid way of determining which "no" means "yes," and which "no" means "no." Not understanding that could put you in a position to be charged with rape. I would personally walk away from such a relationship. Too kooky and dangerous for me.

Now, if your relationship is such as I described in the previous paragraph, but you find her so hot that you just can't walk away, then maybe the following will be of value to you if you inadvertently misinterpret the meaning of her "no" and she has you arrested for rape.

Sometime ago, I saw a documentary about equipment used by the police to determine whether someone is telling the truth or not. It's sort of a new twist on a lie detector. The suspect is wired up with a skull cap and then views suggestive photos or words that are quickly flashed on a TV screen. The brain wave reactions of the suspect are recorded. Whether the suspect is turned on, turned off, or indifferent about what he sees on the TV screen is determine by his brain wave activity. There's no hiding it. You can utter a lie, but your brain can't lie. Your brain tells it like it is. It's sort of like the fact that you can lie to others, but you can't lie to yourself. This equipment records what you are telling yourself via your brain--the truth. So possibly, your defense lawyer could subject your former lover to such a test to show that she in fact enjoys rape fantasy type sex. But this is no guarantee that you'll walk away free. It might just improve your chances of walking away free.

Now, although I didn't infer that from your question, it's nonetherless possible that you and your girlfriend are both attracted to rape fantasy type sex, and the two of you feel like you're a perfect match for each other. If so, I'd worry about that and seek help. Otherwise, you could end up in jail because of an unfortunate misunderstanding.

Answer 4

When a woman says No she means No. I would take it this way. Many men have been accused of rape because they thought No mean Yes. No means NO. Yes means YES. It is and should be that clear.

Answer 5

If the woman is playful and like you and wants to tease you, most likely she is saying the opposite and wants to play with you.
If she is serious kind then NO MEANS NO.
If she is loose cahracter type, then she will say NO and make you do everything.

So depends what kind of cat you have got...

Answer 6

Please. People in general say no when they mean yes, and vice versa. But specifically it would have to do with what she's answering. Because women don't as a rule say no when they mean yes.

Answer 7

No and if she does she's a fool. Make her be a big girl and say "yes" for herself. If she can't do that, then go find an adult to play with.

Answer 8

that depends on what you asked her. in some cases yes. like when youve done something and you ask if shes mad at you and she says no- its really a yes in disguise. learn this otherwise your in for a lot of arguments,lol.

Answer 9

when a woman says no that means no..

Answer 10

Mostly I mean it when I say no except on the subject of presents maybe.I'll say no I don't want something,but I really do.If you're referring to sex,then no means no.

Answer 11

If a woman says no she means keep your nasty grubby hands off of me you sleeze bag.