I have been married for 3 years and with my husband for 14. We have two children. In the last 9 months are fights have esculated to the point where my daughter wakes up crying. Recently he sent me to the hospital with a mild concussion, he spits at me, insults and puts me down making me feel like I'm worth nothing. Why do I stay? I still love him and know that something has changed him. Please tell me why I keep myself here hurting and crying?
2006-12-09 01:32:58 · 16 answers · asked by D/V A 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
well u said it u love him. u don't want to leave ur in a comfort zone. u don't want to start over again. but the way he's been acting u have a fear if u would leave what would he do. so he has been fine except the last 9 months. it is possible that it is drugs. Has he been like this before? Maybe he has someone else. there could be a number of reasons if possible try to talk to him about what it is. if he can't talk then u all need a cooling off period. u and ur kids need to leave. his behavior will not get any better until he helps his self and don't put ur kids in the middle of that.
2006-12-09 02:15:46 · answer #1 · answered by wishstar28 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe you stayed because you don't want to be alone so it is easier to stay then to be alone but trust me it's better to be alone then be in that kind of a relationship that's why I got out of mine an yes being alone is no fun but you have to be strong and leave and if you won't leave for yourself leave for your kids because that is no life for children to be in, I believe your not being a good mother if you stay in that kind of relationship so it's up to you be a good mom and move on with your life and your kids, I can't say how long it will take you will find someone someday that will treat you Good , but right now you need to be good to your kids and yourself this is the most important thing you can do for all of you and expressly for the kids
2006-12-09 09:57:07 · answer #2 · answered by hott f 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are probably feeling that you are betraying him by leaving. You are a faithful wife and mother. I was in the same situation, you have to find somewhere to go. There are many places that can help you. It is only a matter of time before he "accidentally" kills you or injures you and then he will turn on the children next. I will be here for you if you need me, but there are tons of programs that will help you and protect you.
2006-12-09 09:46:45 · answer #3 · answered by Moody2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't love him you feel depended on him. You stay in this situation because you don't think you are strong enough to make it on your own. well women do it everyday and they make it just fine. I can't understand why you would want you daughter witnessing this one more day. Your job is to protect her and make her feel safe, well this isn't making her feel safe. Love does not behave like this. I would make some plans and better your life, This relationship has run its course and it will eventually do irreversible damage, if it hasn't already. Think about your child here and not what you want. Give her the kind of home she deserves. Not a violent and abusive home.
2006-12-09 10:35:24 · answer #4 · answered by Maizy * 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i don't know i asked myself that question before! You are scared once you get some strength to get up and fight back you will leave . Nobody deserves that. but noone knows exactly why they stay in it for so long, but they do know that you will get out of it eventually. And when you do you will know what you deserve! And that is not it! Good luck ,and call the police next time he decides to mess up a pretty face! He doesnt care y should you care about his manhood in the jail! seriously......
2006-12-09 12:26:16 · answer #5 · answered by kmiller 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Because of your children am sure. I have made that mistake. Go now. This is hurting your daughter. Not to mention you. Lose the loser! Leave silently. He will hurt her to get back at you. Do not make him wise of it..Call the police. They will get you out if you have no other way to leave. Press assault charges and file an ex parte when you do call them. Do this for your child. And you!
2006-12-09 10:00:54 · answer #6 · answered by bountyhunter101 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hey... ok well I think you may be staying because you are scared to leave and for your kids. You don't want them to see there daddy get arrested or just to have to move. You may also be scared of having to go out on your own if you don't have a job or something. I know you may love him only you have to get out and get him help. Even if your marriage doesn't work you can always be his special friend.
And plus if he is violent with you he will hit your kids. Mostly boys but sometimes girls
2006-12-09 09:45:23 · answer #7 · answered by help:) 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out now and take the kids with you before he starts hurting them too. Go to a shelter, leave the state, go somewhere. You can't change him back so get out and take the kids with you. RUN
2006-12-09 09:45:21 · answer #8 · answered by cmpbush 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Get out while your children still have one parent that love them and cares about them. Your huz does not care cuz if he did he would want them to have a happy healthy childhood. So get out while you are still ALIVE and able to take care of them. Love them enough to put THEIR needs in front of YOUR needs or HIS.
good luck
2006-12-09 13:33:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You stay because you are afraid to leave him and move on.It's plain and simple he is not good for you or your kids and the only way to stop the insanity is to leave him . Men think we need them and they can do anything they want to do to us .It is up to you to show him he is NOT needed or wanted . Make arrangements to leave him because thats is your only option at this point.
2006-12-09 09:48:05 · answer #10 · answered by IT'S JUST ME ! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋