GET YOURSELF INTO BRITAIN – WIN A COUNCIL HOUSE!!!!!!!!!
Good Morning and welcome to a brand new edition of ASYLUM. Today’s programme features another chance to take
part in our exiting competition……
GET INTO BRITAIN AND WIN A COUNCIL HOUSE!!!!!!!!!
We’ve already given away hundreds of millions of pounds and thousands of dream homes, courtesy of our sponsor;
“THE BRITISH TAX PAYER”
And don’t forget, we’re now the fastest growing game on the planet. Anyone can play, provided they DON’T have a valid BRITISH PASSPORT. You only need to know one word of English; ASYLUM.
Prizes include all-expenses paid accommodation, cash benefits start at £180 per week and a chance to earn thousands more begging, mugging and accosting drivers at traffic lights. This competition is open to everyone stowing away on one of our partner airlines, ferry companies or Eurostar. No application ever refused, reasonable or unreasonable. All you have to do is destroy all your papers and remember the magic word; ASYLUM.
Why, only this week 140 members of the Taliban family from Afghanistan were flown goat class from Karbul to our International gateway at Stanstead Airport, where law enforcement officers were on hand to fast track you to luxury accommodation at the £200 per night at the Hilton Hotel. You will join tens of thousands of other lucky winners already staying in hotels all over Britain. Our most popular destinations include the famous White Ciffs of Dover, the world famous Toddington Service area in historical Bedfordshire and the money trees at Croydon. If you still don’t understand the rules, don’t forget there’s no need to phone a friend or ask the audience – just apply for Legal Aid! Hundreds of lawyers, social workers and counselors are waiting to help – it won’t cost you a penny.
So play today! It could change your life forever. Iraqi terrorists, Afghan dissidents, Albanian gangsters, pro-Pinochet activists, anti-Pinochet activists, Kosovan drug dealers, Tamil tigers, Yardie gangsters, Rwandan mass murderers, Somali geurillas and Polish refugees.
COME ON DOWN!!!!!
Get along to the airport, get along to a lorry park, (its ok as the driver gets prison and not you), also get along to the ferry terminal. Don’t stop in Germany or France where they don’t want you. Go straight to Britain and you are guaranteed to be one of the tens of thousands of lucky winners in the softest game on earth!!!!!
Roll up, roll up my friends for the game that never ends!!!!
Everyone’s a winner when they play;
ASYLUM!!!!!!
2006-12-09 00:11:34 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
What you say is absolutely true, could you immagine any other country in the world allowing it! And to boot, we musn't say
happy Christmas, lest we offend them!
HAPPY BOGGING CHRISTMAS
2006-12-09 00:56:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
That young woman should have won, on the Parallel Bars.. she was so good and so close.. her dismount did her in (and the honey-voting by judges that are enamored with the 11 yr olds that the Host Country's trotting out). Wonder what the bribes are, this time around?
2016-05-22 22:39:20 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A Muslim woman came knocking on my door, I never opened the door just talked to her through the letter box to see how she likes it.
just thought you might like this.
2006-12-09 00:24:33 · answer #3 · answered by braveheart321 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is disgusting and very disheartening. Gee, what the government won't do for you but will do for terrorists and illegals. What a shame!
2006-12-09 00:21:44 · answer #4 · answered by looloo1122 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The game of Asylum - seek(er) and ye shall find ! (English idiom) haha
2006-12-09 02:25:15 · answer #5 · answered by Scotty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, well! I learn something new every day!
I wish you a great weekend.
2006-12-09 11:03:48 · answer #6 · answered by jfmm 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Truth hurts that should be ur title that was brilliant !
2006-12-09 01:19:36 · answer #7 · answered by Mommy of 3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, i am interested. tell me, can I bring along all my wives?
What about my children and cousins and nephews, ooops1 the nephews are not married. can they take your women as their wives?
2006-12-09 00:30:41 · answer #8 · answered by Jomtien C 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Many a true word said in jest !!!!!!!
2006-12-09 00:21:55 · answer #9 · answered by Shredder 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ok i im in
2006-12-09 00:15:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋