I broke with my girlfriend - with my first girlfriend.
No, I'm not dead, but trying to live and get over it. I'm flirting again with other girls, but I simply can't forget her a single day.
I remember her face in my mind; I listen to her voice to me in my head; I can almost feel her lips...
I see her in everything!!
When I go to the park we used to, I feel like crying, screaming... Don't things much worse...
And I know that there is no way we can get together again...
And I know I can't say this to anyone. We men are supposed to be strong, aren't we? Oh, and how pathetic would it look like!
..
If I could just... hug her with my soul, perhaps my emptiness would fade away... at least for a second...
.............
I don't know what to do... I don't know what to think... I just hate to feel.
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2006-12-08 19:52:36 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
First love is ALWAYS like that. You'll never completely get over it, but eventually you mostly get over it.
I would suggest sleeping with as many girls as possible until then lol.
2006-12-08 19:56:20 · answer #1 · answered by vasya v 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's a focus thing
you are so recently severed from a thing that has had so much of your attention and time that your senses are somewhat thrown by the fact that this "understood" common factor is no longer in the picture and your sense of "normalcy" is groping around for a new base and reattaching and clinging to the memory factor to stabilize your life quotions.........
This is not something that will go away easily or quickly---and is somewhat like being severed from air for a while---
Best trick in the book to regroup here though ---is to get on out there and make as many new friends and contacts as possible and fill your life up with as much to do as you can---busy busy busy--- it helps a great deal because your not giving yourself time to brood and fester over the loss-------------One major warning here though----be VERY CAREFUL about meeting new females that you allow to become too close too quickly through this stage of what's going on with you because you will have a tendency to make far more of the relationship than is truly there (this is where the "rebound" relationship thing comes into play and it is a MAJOR source of pending problems)
Hope this eases at least part of this thing for you-- because I know what it's like ---I think a great number of us have been there and it is not a pleasant thing by a long shot--- but you will survive and you will find someone else and when the exactly right one does come along--- it's going to make all of this an absolute nothing to have had to deal with !!!!
2006-12-09 04:20:00 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been in the exact situation a few years ago but I got over it. Here's what I did. First, I evaluate myself. I checked my self esteem level. Of course it was depressingly low at that time. I checked all activities that I missed. Basically the reason for this is to divert your attention from pain to yourself. This is the perfect time for you to rejuvinate yoursef. You can get to know the real you by examining all that had happened, each expectation failed, each glorious moments, every wrong decision and mishaps, dreams, ambitions, strengths and weaknesses.
Next is to plan. Not revenge okay? Grab a pen and paper. Take down the summary of your intrapesonal analysis and plan what can you do about this. If a roof is leaking what doyou do? Do you just sit around and count the drops? No, you call a carpenter to fix it ot fix it yourself. Same goes to you. FIX YOURSELF first.
Go out. Have fun. Call your party buddy and go out the town. Its not healthy for you to dwell in that depression. Save the little sanity left in you. Save it for yourself.
You also need some healing time. If possible avoid the source of pain for the meantime. Too many hurtlful memories will put you in a situation yuo do not want to be in. Trust me.
At the end of the day, the only help you can get is from yourself really. We decide for ourselves. Remember that. And if you decide to be happy, you will. If you decide to take another chance in life, you can. But if you decide to be a loser and live a pathetic life, then that's your call.
Don't rush things... Do not fret, THIS TOO SHALL PASS.
2006-12-09 04:31:27 · answer #3 · answered by murkycandy 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Love has a strange hold on us sometimes,...if you know that you really have no chance with her anymore, you are going to have to come to terms with that...maybe you shouldn't be dating yet, either...until you have her really out of your soul.....you must remember that time is a great healer, and that you will love again...it is like a death, when a love so strong ends, I know...I have been there..and it seems like it will never stop hurting. But I always had the Lord to pray to, to give me strength,...low and behold, I ended up marrying him...So you just never know, when you think it is vanished, then just around the corner the light shines bright...if it is meant to be, then who knows what the future really brings...but dont date some poor girl, to try to 'get over the other one ' thingy...you won't ever be happy, and the poor girl doesn't deserve to be in that position...God Bless, say your prayers for guidance and strength, and let the chips fall where they may....
2006-12-09 04:15:47 · answer #4 · answered by MotherKittyKat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont know i ask people all the time, im still trying to get over my ex unsuccessfully but you just gotta keep doing your thing be about ur business and it fades a bit but im still in love and it comes back to you every once in awhile all of the memories sometimes i even cry but im still just trying to live my life thats all you can do
2006-12-09 03:56:22 · answer #5 · answered by wildchild_wannab 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
first loves have such an impact on your life. you won't ever forget her and you will always have tender feelings for her. but i promise you'll love again. but take it in stride. i'm sure that seems to you now like it will never happen. it probably feels like you'll always feel this way and nothing can make the pain subside. i promise it will be ok.
2006-12-09 04:28:26 · answer #6 · answered by ♥Rabeka♦ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry. It does take a while to get over things like that.
It's like, you felt like you had someone to lean upon for always, then suddenly they're gone and you're alone. But you will find someone new, so slowly, one day at a time, it'll get better and better...
2006-12-09 03:56:35 · answer #7 · answered by ♥ Cliff 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you know you love her like that why you did not try to control yourself and made her love you back, should not try to be a winner with somebody we really love - should sacrify for love, now it's too late, if she is still alone, you will try to see her and show your love - eternity love and maybe you can make her heart move - wait and see - be patient
2006-12-09 04:10:04 · answer #8 · answered by Neighbour 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why can't you ever get back with her?
It is ok for you to feel bad over the breakup; after all, you are HUMAN!
2006-12-09 03:57:06 · answer #9 · answered by KathyB 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
although i cant quite interpret yr situation entirely, i will say this....at the end of your question you say "YOU HATE TO FEEL".....let me tell you that without "feeling" your process to recovery will be so much slower, possibly even stifled so give yrself "permision" to at least do this. additionally "TIME" in this process is a healer, you wont always feel this tragic, and take care...
2006-12-09 04:05:36 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋