I can't figure out what girls mean when they tell me that I'm too "special to them" and they don't want to destroy our friendship by having an intimate relationship. This has happened most of my life, and it is getting annoying, because I simply cannot find love.
I grew up in the U.K. and moved to America when my Mother married a U.S. Air Force Seargent when I was 15 years old. The women all tell me "I love your accent". It happens that "my accent" is the only thing that gets their attention. I feel as though women don't actually find me attractive, and that I am only good to have around because I sound "neat".
2006-12-08 19:25:36 · 14 answers · asked by tristan-adams 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
These answers are great, but let me add a bit more detail so that I can get the resolutional feeling from you very lovely fems here...
Many of these women I speak of did not tell me this until after we hugged, kissed, and snuggled in eachother's arms.
Sometimes they tell me that there is "this other guy" and so I ask them what I mean to them, and they usually say "I don't know", and then about a week later, they claim to only want me as their friend.
It is interesting though, because even if I am "just a friend", I somehow get on the daily call list with them, and even still go out on dates with them (without the intercourse). They do seem to want to hug for an extended period of time after our "friend's" date.
I don't know if they are using me for security, don't find me attractive, or are simply using me for my money. I hope it is not the last example.
Thank you to everyone who took their time to help a bloke like me. I am indebted for all your advice.
2006-12-08 20:22:56 · update #1
That is usually a nice way of saying they like their friendship with you better. It all comes down to the fact because they get along with you, involving sex will make things too complicated. Ultimately ending in possible break up and never wishing to speak to one another again. They don't want to lose what they have with you at the moment, or get their heart broke. It's not that bad. You never know, in time if they keep getting along with you, they might date you.
2006-12-08 19:30:05 · answer #1 · answered by Rexi 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are asking a difficult without knowing you. It took me a long time to find the right man in my life.
Honestly, you seem like a smart guy. 37% of you answers were voted the "Best" on this site. That is a lot, and the other questions you asked or have open are all about astronomy? Your question here is well written (have you read some foolish questions posted on this site?)
You have a lot more going for you than your accent. Be patient and relax.
Confidence is sexy, desperation is not!
Good luck
2006-12-09 03:35:31 · answer #2 · answered by kitzyababa 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You sound like a very nice guy and they do like you as a friend.
Sometimes its just that way, they can be your friend and having something more not only can, but will destroy the friendship, girls sometimes don't want to risk that so they rather remain friends. You sound like that sort of guy. Anyway, don't feel so down and out about it, the right girl will come around when you least expect it. Just enjoy your friends now until miss right shows up, and believe me, when you stop stressing over this, she will be right there. Good Luck, being a nice guy is hard but don't change.
2006-12-09 03:35:20 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It means you're a nice guy. You tried to jump from the "friends" ladder to the "having sex" ladder and you got kicked into the abyss. If you've never read upon the Ladder Theory, I highly recommend you do. Some of the information is crudely presented, but it has the perfect answer for what you're dealing with.
Also, a rule of thumb: a woman knows if she's going to sleep with you within 5 minutes of meeting you.
2006-12-09 03:30:24 · answer #4 · answered by Steve 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Aw thats a shame... but hey its not your fault. From what u have written it seems that all the girls who have said that do not find u attractive and just to make u fel good attack on your accent. U seem to be very adorable though. I'd love to keep in touch, maybe take it a little further. mail me on mushtaq171@mail2dude.com (pls dont mind the name on the email id)
2006-12-09 03:32:32 · answer #5 · answered by Sam 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you find a girl you really like, perhaps you are acting more like a friend.... when you should be a little more personal and sexy towards the one you want for a girlfriend. Always show confidence, caring and respect
2006-12-09 03:32:43 · answer #6 · answered by Patricia 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
maybe there are alot they like in u but they are just not that into u and wanna keep u around but in a nice way:)
good luck
2006-12-09 03:45:37 · answer #7 · answered by simply_me 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you're so right in what you feel. that they don't find you attractive, and that you're just good to be around because you sound neat. that's exactly how it is. you sound very perceptive, so always trust what you can "see".
2006-12-09 03:28:48 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think your hanging around the wrong women,they sound up them selfs,hey baby we only wont to be your friend blah to heck with that balony say this(well lady i dont wont to be your friend ,i wont to be your lover,i ant into friends,if i wonted a friend id go bowling or to the pub)just say it and see what happens ok
2006-12-09 03:32:31 · answer #9 · answered by shell girl 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
These girl's don't see your inner beauty, and they love the idea of male friend's,You will find your sweetheart one day..:)
2006-12-09 03:31:02 · answer #10 · answered by kel s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋