What do you think about homeschooling?

Question

I am debating wheather or not to homeschool my children. They arn't school-age yet but they will be soon. What are the pros and cons of homeschooling? Or would a montossori school be better? Private Religious schools are out since I am not religious, and public schools are only a last resort. Any opinions?

Dear Mike C:
First off, this was originally my husbands idea, secondly, I'm not considering homeschool because I "can't cut the apron strings", I'm considering it because the public school system, in my experiance, is becoming more and more f***ed up by the year. I'm asking for people's helpful opinions and experiances, not personal attacks.

Answer 1

Pros about homeschooling:

*Can build a stronger family than if your kids are separated from each other and from you during most of their waking hours. I know families who started homeschooling after pulling their kids from school and they loved how the family pulled together and the siblings became really close.

*Can give your kids the individual attention they need to make the most of their education. It also means that they can take as long as they need to master something or they can move on ahead.

*Can provide your kids with better role models (you and mixed-age groups) than 30 other kids the same age (and same level of maturity). This also means that having the latest clothing styles or latest electronic equipment is not a big priority on their list because they're not seeing it advertised around them every day.

*Can provide kids with more time to be kids. Since the structure is so different than in school and there's a lot less wasted time, kids have more time to follow their interests or just play.

*Lots more!

Cons:
*People who don't know what they're talking about, especially those who think homeschooling means to be isolated at home. Socialization does not mean interacting with 30 other kids the same age for most of the day each and every day. Socialization is actually the unconscious process of learning and adopting the societal attitudes and behaviours around you. (THINK ABOUT WHAT THAT MEANS: What are the typical behaviours and attitudes at school?) And despite what people say, there are plenty of opportunities for interacting with others while homeschooling.

*It's not for those who aren't willing to commit themselves.

Montessori schools are not created equally. Many aren't much better than a public school, with the teachers requiring specific work out of kids (totally contrary to the Montessori philosophy). Others are great. But your question: Would a Montessori school be better? Better for what?

ADDED: Just read some of the other responses. Good grief. Long-term benefits of homeschooling tend to match the long-term benefits of a good Montessori school: well-rounded student, self-motivated, self-directed, knows how to get along with a variety of ages... I don't know if it's the case for Montessori kids, but for homeschooled kids, there is a tendency to have greater confidence, self-esteem, a better awareness of self. Especially if they've homeschooled from grades 1 until high school.

Plenty of kids transition into private or public school later on and do just fine. It depends on how the parents have treated interactions with other people, how they've referred to school, how they've specifically prepared their kids for the next step. A student who is well aware of what is expected in school and how kids might act is going to do better than a parent who naively just sends their kid to school without any specific preparation.

Answer 2

Social, social, social, blah, blah, blah....

Don't listen to all these answerers who have said homeschoolers have no friends or social activities.

Maybe homeschoolers USED to be that way, when most of the homeschoolers were religious fanatics that thought the world was going to end next week and wanted to keep their kids all to themselves. Well, it's a new era! More and more people are deciding to take their children's educations into their own hands.

I don't know about other towns and cities, but where I live, the homeschool groups have an actual graduation, a prom, sporting events, dances, even FORMAL dances. They have parties and weekly get togethers. They have field trips and play groups.

Homeschooled children are in the Scouts. They volunteer at local groups. They are out in the world every day. They go to the YMCA. They know how to hold a conversation with anyone from the toddler next door to the elderly man at the nursing home, and they are not afraid.

And what about the neighborhood kids? There is nothing saying that your child can't be friends with them, just because they don't go to the same school. Are the private schooled kids shunned by the public schooled ones? Probably not, so it seems to me that the homeschooled ones wouldn't be either.

Answer 3

I would say it depends on you and your kids. When my oldest son was little I always worked with him. I had no idea what was normal, so he learned him colors by the time he was 18 months. Then we got him those foam letters to play with in the tub, and but the time he was 3 he knew all his letters and most of the sounds. At various times we tried private preschools and he would go for a while but different things would stop us (mandatory 2 1/2 hour naps that kept him up all night, pink eye that the class could not get rid of and he caught 3 times, teacher spanked him) Then when he was 4 we found a Montessori school, we loved it. His teacher was trained by the original Montessori methods for several years, not the course they offer at the community college, and she was phenominal!! He left there an emerging reader with a love of learning and respect for those around him.

We put him in public school kindergarten the next year and it was a nightmare. He was too far ahead. He was bored and after 15 conferences we pulled him before he lost the love of learning.

Homeschooling is not easy. It is the best choice for us and since my family is full of public school teachers and I know what public school is like I feel comfortable with my choice. But, you need to go in with some knowledge...

First...Not everyone will understand why you are homeschooling. From the answers you got to this post you will get some idea, but there are a lot of people out there who will start looking at you like you have joined a cult of something.

Second...You need to know the laws of your area. My area is very easy. Not much regulations, but others require recordkeeping, specific curriculum, proof of a certain number of schooldays, etc...

Third...You will need to consider socialization. Since you are not involved in a church, you might want to start looking now for a strong homeschool group. Many have Co Op days where different parents teach things that can better be learned in a group, or park days or PE days. You need to be sure your children are able to function well in a variety of social issues with people of all ages. Make sure they can converse and feel confident. This may become expensive and hectic if the only way you can do this is classes for dance or sports teams. Start planning now.

Third curriculm...there are a TON of choices out there. I am reigious so we have used Abeka (All worksheets) and this year we are using Alpha Omegas Switched on Schoolhouse because my son wanted to try doing it mostly on a computer. Neither is perfect. Next year we will probably do a combination. You need to have an idea of how your children learn best and start looking. I recommend the books What your (1st, 2nd, etc) grader needs to know for a good foundation, And the Well Trained Mind is A good read.

In the end it is up to you. Look at how you will schedule it, what you want to accomplish and be flexible.

Good Luck.

Answer 4

I am sorry to see that you are asking a question and getting so many... as far as I can tell junior & senior high school kids answering a subject that they know nothing about. Only being worried about socialization. (Glurpy and Tammy T have made very valid points however) When I was making the decision whether to homeschool I talked with(at different times) a couple of public school teachers that had met my daughter. I asked about the socialization issue and both of them thought it was funny. I already had her in all kinds of activities and she is so outgoing without being in school that is was obviously not going to be a problem. One also reminded me that the teachers are telling them all day long to be quiet and socialize on their own time.
Definition of:
so·cial·ize

To place under government or group ownership or control.
To make fit for companionship with others; make sociable.
To convert or adapt to the needs of society.

Before going the HS route we enrolled our dd in a private Montessori school and had a horrible experience so if you go that route please do your homework first they are not all equal. They only have to have 1 person that is Montessori trained to be considered a Montessori school and that person doesn't have to be there everyday.

Answer 5

I personally don't think home schooling is the best thing, but if you decide it's right for your family then do your research now. There are home-schooling groups everywhere, more all the time. This would be a good opportunity for socialization. Also, I noticed at my local YMCA, they have the gym reserved every day for 1-2 hours for home schoolers only. Find other parents that are home schooling within 30 miles or so, and plan field trips with them. Again, this allows for social skills in your child to be gained. The biggest beef with home schooling is the lack of socialization, if you can solve that problem then the home-schooling is better. That is if you have the time to devote to this. Do you work FT? If so, I wouldn't do it. Not only is it going to too demanding, you will need some time to yourself. I thought about this when my kids were young, they're 19 and 18 now. With my FT work schedule as a nurse, I couldn't do it. Good luck to you!

Answer 6

I would consider homeschooling to be an absolute last resort. Going to school provides a greater opportunity for development of social skills. It is an important foundation for all areas of our adult life. I was homeschooled for highschool. I hated every second of it. We were part of a homeschool network. The kids were very difficult to relate to. They seemed very out of touch with reality. They were very naive. They also seemed to act younger than their age. Most of the families were extremely religious. Their whole life revolved around church and religion. Thankfully, I had kept in touch with my school friends. Without them, I would have been very isolated. I did receive a good education but, certainly no better than the local public or private schools. I am not familiar with montossori schools, so I cannot answer that. What about non-religious private schools?

Answer 7

In cases of illness or a family that moves often, I don't have any issue whatsoever. But those things aside, I believe it's so different from what one would experience normally that it may cause problems later on. Schools are in a group setting for a reason, and I doubt that a scout group can possibly make up for the amount of socialization a homeschooled kid gets. Schools are more diverse on average than scouts ever thought of being as well. Homeschooling by its very nature is too insular for our shrinking world.

It sounds like your last resort may be your best resort in this case.

Answer 8

There is no "better" in the grand scheme of things. You need to look in your heart, at your kids, and at your individual situation to know what the right choice is for you.

Homeschooling, public school, private school (including montessori) are all potentially effective ways to educate children. But in all cases, it takes parental involvement for success.

My suggestion would be to do research on the various educational approaches, and then figure out what your family's educational philosophy is. Once you have that figured out, you'll be able to decide which method of education best fits.

I would also recommend joining a Yahoo homeschooling group for your state, and getting a feel for what homeschooling, and the homeschooling community is like. For, whether you choose public school, private school, or homeschool, they each have their own social personality. It's important that you feel comfortable there.

Go to http://groups.yahoo.com and do a search for "homeschool yourstate" and join the conversation!

You can also start here to read many articles on homeschooling:

http://homeschooling.gomilpitas.com

and to read up on Montessori, you can look here

http://www.montessori.edu/

Good luck!

Answer 9

I am a piano teacher and I give a discount for home-schooled kids as they are so easy to work with. They usually love learning and are eager to try new things. There are many groups that home schoolers can join, in order to meet other families with the same criteria. Sometimes these groups hire different types of teachers to come in and teach (for example) astronomy or whatever other field someone excels in.

I have to say, I had several girls who were in public school and switched to home schooling. I couldn't believe the difference in how happy and well-adjusted these kids became.

As you probably know, home schooled kids are far exceeding the public school kids on test scores, etc., but I don't think that is as important as the strong confidence and self-esteem gained by learning in a friendly environment at home.

When my son was small, I called a "gifted school" and asked what age they admitted kids. She said "4" and I asked if she recommended Montosorri before then. She said she recommended before age 4 that they stay home with the mother. I was forever grateful that I kept mine out of the system until he was older.

(Just my opinion.)

Answer 10

Always start your children in a public school setting, pre school and kindergarten its a good way to gage how the local schools are and its pretty low profile in those years. Plus it gives you some time to really check into all the possibilities of home schooling.
I didnt' start homeschooling until the 5th grade at that time my son was being seriously bullied and went from an A student to failing math. My daughter asked to be home schooled after being attacked in the bathroom by another girl with a knife.
I brought them home to save their lives.
My daughter now has a wonderful job in the insurance business and is taking online courses from an accredited college. My son will be getting his bachelor's degree in computer technology from a technical school next year.
The only time homeschooling seemed to be an issue is when my daughter wanted to join the Navy. Even though she had a diploma from her accredited correspondence course and letters from the school district which I was connected with from 5th through 9th grade. They still wouldn't take her. It was their loss.