What is a good way to indicat to guests (close fmaily members) that instead of a caterer, we'd like to have a potluck dinner type thing for a meal , with some more specifc things (like medieval food made by myself and bridesmaids to match our theme). how should we go about asking family members to bring their dishes? i don't want to sound tackky or like we're being stingy. our wedding will be fairly small with no more than 60 guests, and that's pushing it!
2006-12-08 14:08:27 · 8 answers · asked by Duelen 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
if they are close family members i would probably call or pass the word along that this will be a potluck meal so that it won't come as a surprise. if you are doing it for budget reasons then i am sure that your family will understand and not feel you are being rude. it isn't like you are asking your grandmothers neighbor to come and bring a dessert. :)
i haven't ever received an invitation like this but i would say something along the lines of:
To celebrate our marriage we request your presence at a Midieval Feast, 7:00 pm on July 9th. The meat, drinks, and dessert will be provided by the Bridal Party. If you are able to prepare a sidedish for our affair we would be forever grateful. We feel blessed to have now doubled our family and hope you are able to attend.
HTH, SD
2006-12-08 14:25:01 · answer #1 · answered by SD 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Hmm... I can think of two distinct approaches that may work best for your situation. First, consider having your parents (or other key family members) spread the word about the theme of your wedding and kind of "sell" the guests on the idea of bringing a dish (in lieu of a gift?). Another approach is to change the wording of your celebration from "wedding dinner" to "wedding festival" or other phrase that indicates that you're having a party. It's a small change, but people expect a reception to include some type of "free" food (and alcohol). At a party, that's not a given.
Make sure your invitations clearly specify that you are having a party with a medieval theme to celebrite your marriage. Specify that it is customary to bring a dish and anything else that the guests need to know (costumes, etc.). You may want to offer that they can bring a dish in lieu of a gift, but that is up to you.
You will definitely need to closely monitor your responses and keep track of the number and variety of dishes that your guests will bring. Always have a backup plan, which may include providing all of the appetizers in this case (depending on your budget). Communication will be key in making this a successful event.
Lastly, do provide beer, alochol and any other beverages--this usually keeps the guests happy.
2006-12-09 03:15:49 · answer #2 · answered by pondering 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It really isn't a good idea to ask people to bring food or drink to your wedding. I would suggest asking for recipes of favorite family dishes and gettting a few volunteers to prepare them. This will give you the potluck feel but, not offend any guests. (You may also get people to offer to make something on their own this way but, it shouldn't be expected as this is a party for you not a family picnic.)
2006-12-09 03:24:52 · answer #3 · answered by emmandal 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here's my opinon:
Let your family know the theme of your wedding and the caterers don't really have what you're looking for. And that you would like to try something different. This way no one will complain about they didn't like what was served or being unfamiliar with a certain dish. Make sure you ask some of them first before making a final decision. See what they say about the idea. If some agree, then go for it. Please make sure a lot of them don't show up with the same dish. Good Luck!
2006-12-09 00:42:03 · answer #4 · answered by teyeli2002 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you theme your wedding, you can theme your invitations accordingly. Create a website with the dishes you want to have - with recipes. Make it like a wedding registry where you can indicate what people have already offered to bring. Then, you can also leave a section where people can offer to bring their own creations. Finally, theme your invitation so that they are encouraged - using medieval language - to log on and see it. Just remember, though, people may then assume that their dish will be their gift - if that's okay with you, then you're off and running!
2006-12-08 22:19:25 · answer #5 · answered by Lisa B 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Don't do this - it's rude. If you want to have family members help out, fine, but you should be supplying at least all the groceries.
If you can't afford to feed people, cut down the meal, or cut down your guest list.
2006-12-09 09:47:00 · answer #6 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gosh, I'm sorry...but that DOES sound incredibally tacky. And it sounds like a recipe for disaster. Most people will not make enough and if they do, it will have been a financial, time, and convenience hardship on them. Just spring for a caterer; geez. Or talk to close friends and family members who aren't actually in the wedding and see if they will help out. But don't ask your guests to cook. I'm sorry, but that's rude.
2006-12-09 02:08:15 · answer #7 · answered by chelleedub 4 · 2⤊ 2⤋
The person's answer above me is awesome. You should vote for them.
2006-12-08 22:23:06 · answer #8 · answered by Kate 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋