BF has anger problems and takes anger out on me. what should I do?

Question

I've been knowing my BF for 1.5 years but we've only officially been going out for one month. since we've been together, I've noticed that he has a very short temper, and he gets really really mad and starts doing cray thing! for instance, snatching things, yelling, cursing, speeding (in the car) and just acting like someone I dont' know. The other day, he apologized for being mean to me and told me he has problems, and it's too deep to explain....
I am supposed to be moving in with him at the end of December 2006, but now I'm thinking it's not such a good idea. his character lately is making me think that he would probably physically hurt me if I move in with him. What should I tell him when he calls me tonight? I want to say the right words to him. I'm not saying that I don't want to be with him, but I want him to know that I recognize he needs to get himself together so that he can stop taking his frusterations out on me.And I want him to be a better person and stop being stressed

Answer 1

Run Run Run.. Tell him you will stick by his side outside of living together.... Under one condition he gets some professional help. If he doesn't then you really need to get yourself away from this situation. Think of what it would be like to have children to someone like this..

Answer 2

Man, there's a lot of abuse.. abusers floating around out there. I bet you get a LOT of answers to this.. (lotta us don't like reading this kinda s*it..) You know it's wrong to move in and want something to work out that's not going to happen (you know this already, I can tell... you just want to make it/'will it' to work out, hon.) Well, this guy sounds young (wait til they're like 50 and act like this.. and U got 3 kids and no where to run.. ) SO I am giving him a break... (a little one.) Give him a deadline.. like a month, two..(?) to straighten his **** out. He DID admit that he has a problem it sounds like.. that's good (a start.) Meeting you? I think it's the best thing he ever did.. you sound super sweet! Do you really have to move in the end of Dec.? I mean U got nowhere's else to stay? None of us can tell ya how to handle somebody else (their anger problem) in here, not really. You need somebody older for this guy to talk with that HE (not U I guess) trusts, then go from there! I think life is frustrating for everybody and some people just cannot 'cope' except by getting physical. (Stuff pisses me off, sure, but I don't friggin' drive like 95, doing the road rage thing, lol) g'luck sweetie!

Answer 3

Ok it sounds like a mental disorder called bi polar it's a thing with chemicals in the brain when a person can turn into a competlely different person and do and say things totally diffrent from there personality and have horrible mood swings and not even realize what there doing i would not move in with him because people who are bi polar can do some crazy things when they get upset and not even realize it. And somtimes there angry can totally take control and they could really hurt you so I suggest you watch him a bit more and if he keeps acting like that i would not move in with him.

Answer 4

if u have to second guess wether or not it will be safe to move in with ur lover than u already know the answer. he is already showing u that he is capable of laying hands on you. next he will be apologizing to you saying "i will never touch u again". it is not worth it. and if he loves u so much then there is nothing too deep to explain. for all u know his father beat his mother and he think that is the right thing to do. u don't want to be nobody's punching bag. maybe talk him into joining an anger management class voluntarily before it becomes mandatory after he lay's his hands on you. it is better to do 3 weeks voluntarily on ur time then to do 52 week mandatory class imposed by the courts of law after he lays hands on u.

Answer 5

My ex bf had the same probs but he never took his anger out on me. And I've been with him for 3 years almost 4 if I didn't dump him. He was also the jealous type. But I strongly suggest you get out of this relationship and fast or take him to see a counciller and quick.

Answer 6

Definitely not a good idea to move in with him given what you've written. I'd actually put some distance between the two of you. If he can't get his anger under control (and keep it under control) you do not need to be around that.

Answer 7

ok seem! i noe in my view i noe leaving somebody you adore is complicated yet while hes been actin like a jackass and treating you poorly for over a 365 days than u gotta provide the message. if u too rather love one yet another; than 6 months is the cut back.If he hasnt made you chortle and smile and say i such as you and jus common ol makes you experience good approximately jus being with him; all interior the same day a minimum of thrice interior the final 6th months then i in my view think of its time to enable pass and discover somebody who's properly worth being with. good day you are going to be able to additionally attempt breaking apart with jus so he can get the message and comprehend what an *** hes been at this element he can basically learn the complicated way! then as quickly as though he gets his act at the same time on your properly-known then u can evaluate taking him back yet enable him noe that his final possibility o.k. could has jus been used. I mean all married couples seperated a minimum of one million group or have been darn close too doing it. so dont think of slicing the string ability its the very end for you and him; considered one of you will consistently have the skill (lol discern of speech) to resume your relationship appreciably a minimum of; yet final analysis you will could pass away the two procedures in case you prefer him to alter; because of the fact in case you have been relationship for over a 365 days i couldnt think of you not telling him the variety you experience already so it variety of feels that his properly is approximately to run dry (lolss yet another discern of speech) actual ,good success too U

Answer 8

Youre only a month into this so you havent invested a lot yet in this. Get out now. It will only get worse. You cannot fix him. He is already abusing you and it will escalate. Dont invest your emotions into this or you will find yourself stuck and possibly end up in the hospital.

Answer 9

You shouldn't be going out with him if he that bad. Temper issues are not something you wanna deal with all the time if he's going to be abusive like that. He either needs to get himself help, or you need to leave him. It isn't safe for you sweetie.

Answer 10

Run, dont walk in the opposite direction, the situation will only intensify living together