who supposedly did it because you wouldn't get back to gether with him?
2006-12-08 11:20:34 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
OKay let me re-phrase this for the unsupportive crap head that posted. I KNOW he didn't do it because of me, no flattery there. I am more afraid of how people would re act if i show up. I dont want to "crash the party" so to speak, nor do i want to cause any other issues.
2006-12-08 11:29:11 · update #1
Follow your heart. It is not your fault he killed himself. If you want to pay your respects go to the funeral. Peace and God bless.
2006-12-08 11:34:44 · answer #1 · answered by cave man 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, if "supposedly" truly has meaning here, and is not just how you phrase things, if the rumor mill is at work here, then I think nothing is gained by being there. I think depending on your relationship with his parents, perhaps you talk to them, offer them condolences and if they are aware of the rumors, tell them rather than be a distraction to the family, you are choosing not to attend.
On a more personal note, I don't think you have anything to gain either. Ultimately, suicide is a selfish, cowardly act (no offense to anyone who's had someone close to them do this, but it is true). He certainly wasn't thinking of you in a positive light when he did it, whether it's true or not that you were the reason. You need to grieve for his family's loss, but you need to move on from this quickly, since your relationship with him was obviously over. Even if he said it was you, it's not your fault.
2006-12-08 11:30:10 · answer #2 · answered by You'll Never Outfox the Fox 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you should go to the home and pay your respects. If at the funeral home you feel like you can't hold it in any longer go to the bathroom and cry don't let the family see you cry, If you think this is hard for you think about the family. I can't say that Ive ever been through anything like that but I have had to hold my friends head up while he died at the scene of an accident. . It Will hurt for a while but you can't just sit around because you'll drive yourself nuts. I If you can busy yourself with something it will only help. You've got to move on. I know it's hard to move on after something like that but you've got to get on with your life . I don't know your ex but I pretty sure he would want to move on and go better placed with your life. Just think about it like this he can't feel the hurt, the pain,the loneliness, the grief. he's in a better place. That is a better way of looking at it.
2006-12-08 11:42:16 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's A Tough One.
I Probably Wouldn't If I Was The Reason.
I Would Definitely Talk To His Family And See How They Feel About The Whole Situation.
2006-12-08 11:23:11 · answer #4 · answered by Paradise * 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't be a slave to the selfish action that he did. The fact that the might have stated that he did it because you did not go back with him further shows that he just wanted to hurt you.
He was a human being and you have to forgive him. There might be people who will give you a dirty look but you in your mind you did not have anything to do with it.
Think about it, then everyone in the world would commit suicide. What you know that we don't, is how his family feels. Do they blame you? Are you the scapegoat for their sadness and anger? If you don't feel like going, I would write them a letter expressing your feelings.
2006-12-08 11:28:51 · answer #5 · answered by nowhere 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
if it was supposedly because of you, i would bring it up to his family and ask if it would be ok with them before though...you should know though that it is not your fault and if you are feeling to blame, you need to talk to someone about it....i went back and forth regarding whether I should attend my ex bf's mother's funeral. She committed suicide on christmas eve. I ultimately decided not to just because I had not been on good terms with my ex and didn't want to make it awkward for him because of the magnitude of the situation and he had alot of other things on his mind other than seeing an ex. I did send a condolences card though.
2006-12-08 11:29:20 · answer #6 · answered by kristina807 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you honored and respected him, then I don't see why not. It isn't your fault that he killed himself. I know this may sound cold and heartless, but he was the one with the issues. He was the one who should have sought help. Now it is too late. You might have to deal with his family, but you should never ever feel guilty for his suicide. Feel bad for him, yes. Not guilty. You have the right to accept or reject anyone you please.
2006-12-08 11:27:53 · answer #7 · answered by davester1970 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It depends how well you know his parents. If you don't know his parents very well, you might not want to go since you are his ex and they might have something against you even if they know it wasn't your fault. If you know them, you should go because if you don't, they'll think you're rude.
2006-12-08 11:31:52 · answer #8 · answered by Sarahie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Going to a funeral...to me, is about genuinely going because of a good heart, because you care, because you feel sorry, because you will miss the person...etc. If you feel it in you genuinely, then you should go, regardless of what he was to you.
2006-12-08 11:23:41 · answer #9 · answered by ? 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
WOW!!!!
You've asked a real whopper here!!!
I presume that your ex-boyfriend's family did not invite you to his funeral. And I don't think you should attend the funeral. Maybe send a card of sympathy or apology.
I'm more concerned to know how you feel that this man took his own life because of YOU!
2006-12-08 11:25:17 · answer #10 · answered by midjrsy 3 · 1⤊ 3⤋