cancer-how did my mom go so fast?

Question

my mom was diagnosed with lung cancer and was immediately started on 13 rounds of chemo 1 every week. After 2 weeks of treatments she was extremely ill and went to the hospital and found fluid building around her heart. She said no more chemo and the doctors said 6-9 months without treatment. She said that was fine. On That Thursday she was watching tv and talking to all of us in the hospital and after her shot she seemed like she was resting, but then we realized she was in a blank stare with her eyes fixed and grey. She passed away the next day never changing the fixed gray stare. What happened-is this typical?

Answer 1

I'm so sorry that your mom passed away. Cancer is a tough thing to beat and some forms are more aggressive than others. It depends on what stage your mom's cancer was in as to what her initial prognosis was. The fact that she had fluid around her heart (tamponade) was problematic. It may have indicated that the cancer was spreading more rapidly than the doctors thought, perhaps her body couldn't tolerate the chemotherapy. Sometimes when the body just can't fight off disease anymore, the organs start shutting down; maybe this was the case with you mom. Whatever the case, from reading your narrative, it sounds like your mom was not in any pain or distress as her life drew to a close. Please take comfort in that fact. I have had the privilege to lead many families down this difficult path of losing a loved one, and it is never easy. My heart goes out to you and your family.

Answer 2

First let me give my condolences to you, and your family. I never expected to see this question on here but nevertheless I will try to answer it. My mom was not a smoker but was diagnosed with lung cancer in May of 1999. She passed away in August of that year. Three months, and she was gone. I had no idea how sick she was because she didn't tell me. I decided to take the time to visit her just to make sure she was ok but to my shock, and dismay she wasn't. I stayed with her the whole three months taking her to her chemo, and radiation treatments but I think this was just a formality. She was diagnosed with metastatic non small cell lung cancer. I really don't know why your mom passed away after her shot or if it was normal. I can only say that maybe the shot had nothing to do with it but that it was God who decided her fate. Nevertheless I do know how you must feel because I know how devastated me, and my family were. I wonder every day why in this day, and age this type of cancer has to take loved ones so quickly. My dad passed away of leukemia many years ago, and even though I was twelve it seemed like it was only a few month he was sick. I hope you will take the time to love the rest of your family because this experience has made my brother, and I so much closer.

Answer 3

Your poor mum may have gone into respiratory arrest. Chemotherapy is very poisonous; it destroys everything in the body, including the good cells. It pushes you to the edge of a cliff, pushes you over and then drags you back.
It is a terrible strain on the body, and sometimes the body just goes into shock, and says "no more".
The heart can fail, or the lungs. Your mum did not have to go through all that chemo with perhaps very little hope at the end - she went very quickly while you were all there with her.
Perhaps her prognosis was poor anyway. I don't know. I work in a chemo ward, and have sometimes been very taken aback at the speed of the reaction to chemo. I have seen people go into arrest after only one chemo treatment.
The risks are fully explained to a patient before the start of treatment, nad of course the patient can say at any time, "enough".
I'm terribly sorry for your loss, but maybe you have been spared the months of false hope that chemo can sometimes give, with all that prolonged suffering for your poor mum.

Answer 4

I'm so sorry to hear that... that must be really harsh losing a parent. Some forms of cancer just work that way. Her heart probably could not take the stress of chemo or the fluid that was building up around it. I wouldn't say it's typical, but then again, doctors can only give an estimate and sometimes they are wrong.

Answer 5

Doctors can only guess how much time a patient may have. They really don't know. And, yes, although it is tragic a patient can pass away very quickly from cancer or secondary conditions brought about by the cancer.

My son has a rare abdominal cancer and I am in contact with other patients with his disease. Many of them report that when their chemotherapy stops working or they stop the chemo treatment that their cancer spreds like wildfire . . within weeks it can double.

If your Mom's cancer was not responding to chemotherapy than the cancer was already spredding rapidly which eventually caused the fluid to build up and possibly her death. It's really hard to say for sure without knowing more about her history.

My condolences for the loss of your mother. Peace to you during this difficult time.

Answer 6

I am so sorry for your loss and although I know that nothing I say is going to help you right now. I did want you to know that as a cancer survivor myself and I have had 18 surgeries in the past 21 years. The most recent were 6 weeks ago.

Sometimes the body just can't take the pain. There were times when I thought that pain was going to kill me and there were times when I actually asked to die. The best thing I can tell you to do is to understand that maybe God has other plans for your mom right now and he needed her help in heaven. maybe he didn't want her to hurt any longer and maybe he didn't want you guys to have to watch her suffer any more than she had. Lung Cancer is a slow and painful death and even though you weren't ready to let her go maybe she was ready.

I just lost a friend to liver cancer last Saturday and her services were this past Tuesday. I feel better knowing that she is in a better place and free from pain now.

God Bless you and I will pray for you.

Answer 7

First off, I just want to say that I am so sorry. Lung cancer is one of the worst cancers. It has a high morbidity rate, higher than deaths by breast cancer, colon cancer, and prostate cancer combined. It accounts for 28% of cancer deaths in the US. She might have had a heart attack because of the fluid around her heart, a stroke from a blood clot, or anything.

I am so sorry you had to go through something like that.

Answer 8

I am so sorry to hear about your mom. My husband had no symptoms. He was diagnosed March 20th. Went thru radiation, chemo, gamma knife procedure, and took a drug called tarceva. Sadly he passed June 6th. It is a struggle every day. Good luck to you Stay strong

Answer 9

Yes I am sadly to say and am very sorry for your loss. My grandpa was good and fine had no signs of anything,then one night he had a real deep pain in his chest and was throwing up a lot he made some chicken soup ( To my grandpa Chicken soup fixed everything) then he went to bed and past away in his sleep from a hart attack.

He had no symptoms of one or no problems before then just that time.

Answer 10

Sorry for your loss, cancer is terrible. Your mom is in a beautiful place with God. You would be happy that she went quickly without the suffering compared to some.