Part II - Sex, Sex and More Sex, Am I Different Than Other Men My Age?

Question

Great advice everyone and just to clarify... I've been with my wife for almost 9 years, married only 9 months though ( and no we're not having a baby ) lol.
It's not that sex controls my life, I function normally, I can drive without distraction, do my work, etc. I just feel like inside, I need to be having more sex. I do masturbate, sometimes before work in the morning, but usually when she's not home. Even after doing that I don't feel fullfilled.

I definitley will not seek out other women for sex, I will not cheat on my wife. I also do not want to bring another woman into the bedroom.

I have a good home, job, life basically, so no low self esteem....

We do other things together, play games, movies, dinners, weekend getaways, etc.

I do the "seduction" thing sometimes, bubblebath, flowers, candles etc. She usually goes along with it, but if I do it too often, I think she'd not be too excited about it.

I think I can talk to her about it, actually I know that I can.. and I think I will.

thanks again everyone...

Wifey isn't watching... she's too busy playing Pogo games lol...

We do the dress up thing etc. too, thats always fun.. she's got some great outfits...

I just wish it would happen more often...

one thing I forgot to mention is that... I love oral, giving and receiving... I want it everytime we're together, and she doesn't.
sometimes, i don't even care if she gives, i just want to please her....

Answer 1

Yeah!! you're definitely different than other men!

You have this so called "gift" ... .... ... the ultimately never ending flow of "Libido" in other words "sexual energy"

Most Guys, after cumming...definitely go weak..and fall asleep zZz ... but in your case, you just gotta keep goin' and goin' and goin' .... .... ... hehehe

i admire you though!! you're not seeking other women for sex or bring them to bed....(or are you just saying this 'coz your wife is watching you!?!? :p) you're definitely different than other men!

Answer 2

You got a lot of bad answers in your last question. And, while the answers here are not as bad they also don't really tell you anything. Ignore people who say that you are addicted because your interactions are normal. The term sexual addiction is primarily pushed by religious groups but is not recognized by the American Psychological Association. Roughly 2/3rds of all people fit into the range of having sex once every two weeks to twice a week. Only 2% of couples have sex once a day. More desire than this is unusual but not abnormal. I'll repost what I said in your last question.


I've always found it puzzling that people know that most things vary from person to person but somehow assume that sexual desire is the same. Most people have the odd idea that anyone who wants more sex than they do is strange. If the difference is very large usually labels get thrown around like being addicted to sex. Another common notion is that problems with desire can be overcome if you really love each other. You can either cling to these ideas or you can face facts.

I'm 44 but my preference is having sex twice a day. I don't use sex in place of affection; I am very affectionate. That is simply the amount that I need. This level is not common in the population and only about 1 in 500 women would match. So, I specifically looked for this in a potential girlfriend. This worked for me and I found someone who is a very good match both in terms of desire and other important things like being caring, having a sense of humor, having similar hobbies, etc.

If you are with someone who has a lot less desire than you do your options are limited. The first and most important thing is to ignore anyone and everyone who says that your wife will be more in the mood if you are: more romantic, show more respect, are more helpful, tell her you love her, consider her feelings more, be more understanding, etc, etc. From what you've described as having sex two to three times a week, your wife is perfectly average. It will not be possible for you to substantially increase her level of desire. That option is out.

That only leaves two options. Neither of these are ideal but they are all you have beyond the much worse options such as having an open marriage, cybersex, or having an affair. The first option is that you can masturbate completely separately from your wife using whatever erotic material you prefer. This however tends to have two bad side effects of both turning your fantasies away from your wife and it can also make your wife feel inadequate.

The second and best option is to talk this over with your wife carefully without any type of labeling or criticism. See if your wife would be willing to participate without actually engaging in sex. For example, see if she would be willing to cuddle with you while you masturbate. This is by far the best option because participation by your wife will tend to strengthen your feelings for her and because she is involved she won't tend to feel inadequate. Talk this over with her and see if she would be comfortable with some type of participation. Make it clear that you want her to participate because of your feelings for her and that she is not required to do anything beyond cuddling. She may feel like participating more at times like kissing you, caressing you, or even directly stimulating you. If she does then so much the better but make it clear that this is not required or expected everytime and consider it a bonus when you get it. If you can discuss this with her and she is willing this will be your best option.

Answer 3

I am like that as well. People like us have a very very high sex drive. You said that you do all these things for your wife , but what does she do that satisfy you, and i not talking about that. unless she does not do that then she should start. Ask her dress up in a nun's custom or a school girl. Watch some porn with her , add a little bondage . Fore play is a must and it must be mutual. It wont work if its one sided. Be adventures. Masturbation gets tired some . Enjoy one another.

Answer 4

i opt for to relive this life back and back; and that i do. My life is facilitated by my means to remember a number of my previous life reviews. yet i'm particularly confident that i'm a rarity. i trust that ninety 9% of the worlds inhabitants does no longer opt for his or her life or that life's route. i became granted the alternative by a more beneficial capacity(God, in case you'll). i became His angel which has delivered me particular privileges that were no longer given to maximum human beings. there have been, even with the undeniable fact that, particular lives i became no longer allowed to make your thoughts up on. Carlos slender's personality became ruled out as a decision, as were different billion/millionaires and different severe profile varieties.(i trust they get to maintain their personality's for eternity also). because it became, I had to make your thoughts up on someone "common". i did not commence out because the guy i'm now, yet that's the time body that i wanted and that's the country(u . s . a . of america) i wanted, so I chosen my present day personality. i am going to might want to make the better of it, with what i have were given.

Answer 5

Your normal.I was the same way except I never jerked the joint.I 'am not proud of it but I could not leave other women alone.Not to Bragg but most of the time they came after me.My sex drive was to much.I'm now an old man and show no signs of slowing down.Stay true to your wife I wish I could have been strong as you.Good luck& God bless.Not many men could be that strong. I do not cheat any more.I know now that I'am a one woman man.

Answer 6

Dude I feel ya Just keep on doing what ur doing I think eventually things will work out for ya.

Answer 7

that's so sweet! good luck on the talk with her! i'm sure you can do it. a great marriage is an open one!

Answer 8

sounds like you are better off than most of us.

Answer 9

so do ya thing

Answer 10

Welcome