she came from a bad relationship. i have gone above and beyond to make her feel secure. i have tried to let her know that she is the most important person in my life. she accuses me of checking out other girls in front of her. she gets jealous if i make comments about celeberties on tv. she had me drop all my female friends. she calls me a liar when i have only lied about 3 things. the three things that i lied about i fessed up to. they were minor. they had to do with what time i got home from the club and me lying about my friends still calling me. i take her with me everywhere i go including bars,clubs, drive an hour an half in traffic to to go see her on my days off, i try to spend all my free time with her, call her 5-7 times a day to talk to her let her know what im doing, send her nice text messages, by her just because gifts, take her weekend getaways, spoil her with gifts that she cant afford but would like. what else can i do
2006-12-08 03:48:50 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you cant dude you just have to give it time and it will all turn out for the best
2006-12-08 03:50:52 · answer #1 · answered by dirtydeathgutter 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She has been in a bad relationship and she is putting up a wall so to speak that 'in case' anything happens with you and her that it will be easier for her in her mind. You have to realize that some people are just naturally jealous (especially Taurus's) and it has nothing to do with you. Do what you are doing but add conversation. Like 'do you think I would cheat on you or leave you for another woman'? Tell her how much you love her and that if you wanted another woman you wouldn't be with her. Give it some time, maybe even a few years, but eventually she will let it go but it will go slowly depending on how bad she was hurt before.
2006-12-08 04:14:12 · answer #2 · answered by Karen A 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is not much more that you can do. My wife was abused for 19 years in a relationship. If she were not on medication she would be much worse than your girlfriend. She was not on medication when I met her and it was tough at times.
You might want to recommend therapy. My wife has been seeing a therapist for years now and it makes a huge difference. You can even go with her once in a while. I go and we have learned how to communicate. It is different than communicating with a girl who has not been abused.
Keep doing what you are now and know that her behaviors are learned defense mechanisms. Read some books on domestic violence and you will be even more prepared.
Take care,
Troy
2006-12-08 04:01:07 · answer #3 · answered by tiuliucci 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dude, she sounds super controlling! She sounds like she doesn't want to trust anyone. In this case, only God can work on her. You sound like you really love her, but I question whether or not she loves you as much in return. I think what you're doing is awesome. Consistency and love, that's all you can do. In the end, it will pay off...whether you find that she is now secure and loves you with all of her heart or doesn't love you. It'd at least be good to know.
2006-12-08 03:53:45 · answer #4 · answered by ღQueenღ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're doing all the right things. Just make sure you reinforce what you're already doing, by discussing it with her regularly - pointing out how irrational her behaviour is and reassuring her again. It's a hard battle mate, but if she's definately the one for you, then in the end it'll be worth it. Best of luck.
2006-12-08 03:53:43 · answer #5 · answered by sjc_three 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
aww, you seem like a really nice boyfriend. All I can tell you is keep it up. She will eventually realize it and all the wonderful little things you do for her. I took my ex for granted in the beginning of our relationship. It just took time for me to realize that i couldn't blame him for my own problems. It wasn't until after we broke up though that i completely realized what I had all along. I hope you guys don't have to break up for her to see, but keep doing what your doing, she appreciates it even if she doesn't tell you or show it.
Good luck & God Bless.
2006-12-08 03:54:35 · answer #6 · answered by m. z. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may want to have a mini break up. She may not be ready for a relationship. But if after a few weeks she may realize that she is being too demanding and taking advantage of your and her distrust is poisoning the relationship.
2006-12-08 03:51:35 · answer #7 · answered by Christopher McGregor 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Run away! You will NEVER fix her. She will make your life miserbale with her man-hating and insecurites. Be her friend but don't be her boyfriend. You'll miss out on way too much of life
2006-12-08 03:52:00 · answer #8 · answered by Foss 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
please do yourself a favor and drop her like a bad habit, her insecurity can and WILL spread onto you. she needs to be alone and get herself some help cause she doesnt even trust herself. Your not married and even if you were you shouldnt have to report yourself especially when you never did anything wrong
2006-12-08 03:51:50 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
to me it sounds like your doing everything right. it may just take time as they say time heals all. good luck man
2006-12-08 03:51:55 · answer #10 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋