She is afraid of the loss that she'll get from losing her current step-mom who treats her good and nice and the fear of when she finally meet her birth-mom whom she has never met b4, is she a slut or is she good...etc. Please help me to help her in answering this question. For a friend...
2006-12-08 02:02:31 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Just by being there just keep your head up okay.
2006-12-08 02:04:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you don't make clear what is actually happening to you (give up the "its for a friend" baloney) are you just meeting your birth mother or are you being sent back to her permenately?
If its just to meet the woman that gave birth to you, why would there be any loss? This meeting doesn't cancel out anything your step mother has done for you; how could it? So don't sweat it; anticipation of the event is far worse than the actually happening.
And don't pre-judge a person you haven't met - wait to see how they really are before you form an opinion. You were put up for adoption for a reason - basicly for your welfare. If you have questions - ask, but don't accuse. Be open to hear her side of the story.
2006-12-08 10:17:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her being adopted is special, after all she was chosen , not just born. Just because someone has a baby doesn't make them a Mother.If her birth Mother gave her up willingly she is a very unselfish person who thought enough of your friend to give her a good life, one she could not give her for what ever reason.
2006-12-08 10:09:58 · answer #3 · answered by Granny 1 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs to realize that the birthmom will never be mom or take the place of mom. They can be friends if they both want it. She is feeling guilty for even wanting to meet her birthmom. Have her talk to her step mom about how she feels. Just be there for her. I went thru the same thing. I am adopted and found my birthmom. You go thru a lot of feelings - abandoned by BM, guilt for trying to replace mom, etc. She can e-mail me if she would like. I would love to talk to her about what she is going thru. She may have the great experience (like I did) of having great siblings, nieces, nephews, aunts, uncles, etc. that she never knew before.
2006-12-08 10:11:09 · answer #4 · answered by eharrah1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing is going to happen, if she is good or if she is not, your friend has the choice to continue or not with the relationship, of course if she is an adult,
2006-12-08 10:12:47 · answer #5 · answered by pelancha 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋