how should i feel about this last night i wrote out a whole detailed letter breakin up with my bf stating things like i feel like im mending to ur personality and after 2 years i still feel nervous with u and lately weve been doing nothing but fighting and when we fight i just get sad and lately i been nothing but depressed, and i thought love sholdnt be like this theres someone better suited for me but as i read my letter to him he just said this is the way all my x's have lefted me n throughout our relationship he constanly said ur gunna get tied of me and leave just like all the rest u wont be able to put up with me with that in mind it just makes things worse he said i really hurt him...n i just cant shake that feeling because i know his love is sincere n true i just dont feel like i should still be having doubts maybe i need to learn what love is n how to love first..i just know i shouldnt feel this way love should be free, and i just want happiness..
2006-12-08 01:36:52 · 17 answers · asked by Big Dawg 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
it seems like he is just trying to guilt trip you into staying with him. if you are not happy you shouldnt stay in a relationship. it will be better for both of you in the long run. you shouldnt stay with someone you are not happy with just because you are scared of hurting their feelings. thats not fair to either one of you.
2006-12-08 01:39:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've had the same problem before. It can be hard because you want to believe that things will work out and I don't doubt that his love is sincere and true but eventually you just have to think about what you deserve. Yes, he may love you.. but that is not always enough. You need to be treated good as well. As much as we'd all like to believe love is enough to make a relationship last it is not.. there has to be other things.. like caring for your partner and not allowing them to be depressed all the time because of you. It sounds like he may just have some personality flaws that he needs to work on.. give him a little longer, if he doesn't fix the problem move on.. it's not fair to you to be depressed all the time in a relationship.
2006-12-08 01:42:44 · answer #2 · answered by Bethany 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may of hurt him but he needs to know how you feel. In order to work through this all, it seems like somethings need to change. You two need to discuss what you want to happen. If you love each other there's a way it can work out but that's for the two of you to figure out. Everyone has hard times in relationships and the two of you are just getting started. Talk it over some more. Tell him you weren't trying to hurt him, you just need him to understand how you feel. If you still want to be with him then so be it. The two of you can plan somethings like going out to eat or something. Maybe if there's a way he can prove to you exactly how he feels. Like everyone else said: his ex's all did the same thing. Talk that over with him, he should realize what he does wrong in order for the girls to do a thing like that. Also when you're upset or mad, he should be there for you to help you get over it, talk it over with you and put a smile on your face. Let him know you expect him to help out the best he can. But if you're not happy and you know you won't be, you shouldn't be with him. Don't stay with him because he wants you to, do it for you. Good luck.
2006-12-08 01:41:26 · answer #3 · answered by tia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be guilted into staying with somebody that you are not happy with and cannot see a future together. If he told you that this is the way everyone else has left him then that is telling you something. He needs to find some happiness with hisself, and you are not going to make him happy. If he is jumping from relationship to relationship trying to make himself happy, then he is just masking an underlying problem. Let him deal with what is his problem and don't make it your problem. Sounds like you are concerned and care for him, but you cannot stay with somebody just because you are afraid to hurt their feelings. Do what you know is right, you may end up very good friends in the end.
2006-12-08 01:44:15 · answer #4 · answered by stacey h 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you know what I know exactly how you feel...honestly...the fights will not stop and it became even worst...but you know what....you do your part..most of the answers that you are looking for you already answer it yourself...whatever makes you happy...go for it..otherwise all that searching....when will you find happiness....if you can't make yourself happy...if he really loves you he would too make the relationship works..you can't fix the relationship by yourself...otherwise youre controling the relationship. and if it dont go your way ....of corse you would get upset and dissappointed..sometimes when you love someone soooo much you have to let them go...another thing is he may be manupulating you...so dont let that get to you..you both know whats right from wrong...if I was you I would let him go..if he really want to be with you he would do whatever it takes to work....trust me and when you do take this step I bet you you would feel a hundred pounds lighter. you dont need to put up with all this nonsense...and yes loveis really complicated but its also a journey to learn....yet you cant say you never been in love before....but feel free to write back anytime...mskittycathy@yahoo.com
GOOD LUCK...hope I help out a lil.....
2006-12-08 01:47:22 · answer #5 · answered by Cat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move on...
If all his exs felt the same way then he should try to at least change his ways; obviously its not working... Its not your fault and you shouldn't feel bad or guilty. There is someone out there better suited for you and him. Love should be easy and not depressing or painful...
Move on and find yourself someone that will amaze you every single day!!!
Someone that just makes you happy just sitting next to them...
Good luck!!!!
2006-12-08 01:39:33 · answer #6 · answered by Milkywayman22 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
so then stop fighting u need 2 talk this out w/ him and an apology would b nice
if u really wanna b 2gether youll find a way
2006-12-08 01:40:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-05 01:14:30 · answer #8 · answered by grumney 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are not the problem...he is ...you dont deserve a pins and needles relationship....if he has lost othes girlfriends for the same reasons...he should get the idea he has to change...not you....and dont think you can change him...that is a myth that never works.....you deserve better and there a lot of decent men out there ....in this case put yourself first...and break it off with him
2006-12-08 01:43:48 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've got it all figured out. You have a clear mind. Loose the regret (breathe in and when yopu expire, let regret go with pure intent).
2006-12-08 01:40:11 · answer #10 · answered by morganna_f 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋