Can a loving parent box, spank or even shout and threat their daughter just because of talking back?

Question

I and my siblings talk together well. we can talk about anything.But it seems different about our parents. My parents don't like us to enter the conversation when they talk to each other. They only talk about them, about their friends, and about their work. They're always busy at work, they dont tell us stories, we dont eat together, and they don't even bother to ask how are we doing.
I and my mom often have misunderstanding. Even for a little thing that I say, or even just for a little comment, she says "Who are you to tell me that?" she also says I might as well be her mother. And the argument starts even though I didn't mean to offend her. There was a time when my mom spank my face and pulled my hair I and my mom were already arguing while I was crying and it just started from a little thing.Then when my dad saw it, he boxed me and pushed me away.my mom also said even though my my face get swollen while going to school It doesnt matter. Can a loving parent do that?

I and my mom often have misunderstanding. Even for a little thing that I say, or even just for a little comment, she says "Who are you to tell me that?" she also says
I might as well be her mother. She also told me she never talked backed to her mother before so shes not deserve that I will talk back to her.
I remember that there was also a time when she told me "bullshit I will throw everything here!!" It started just because I told her a little comment inside the van that she musn't
read the book she's holding in front of my friends. i didnt mean to offend her.

I and my mom often have misunderstanding. Even for a little thing that I say, or even just for a little comment, she says "Who are you to tell me that?" she also says I might as well be her mother. She also told me she never talked backed to her mother before so shes not deserve that I will talk back to her.
I remember that there was also a time when she told me "bullshit I will throw everything here!!" It started just because I told her a little comment inside the van that she musn't read the book she's holding in front of my friends. i didnt mean to offend her.

There was also a time when I talked back to her while I was crying. I told her they spend more time in their work more than her family. Then she got angry. She said they work
in order to provide our needs and buy what we want. They are doing their best to give all out luxuries. Then she said, If you want me to say sorry, then sorry for working not being able to baby and pamper you!!. You know, that's not what I meant. I just wanted them to know that their children needs them and they dont even spend a little time talking and being open with them I mean, us. That time, I wanted to say, I don't need your money!! If you give me money, does that mean you love me? You make us go to school and you leave us there! no advices, no asking how do we do, not even supporting us! We face problems and hardships by ourselves!! We have nobody to lean on. During those times, where is what they call family? It seems like the only thing they think about is work.

Answer 1

I was reading what you wrote and it made me so mad, that I had to reply to you question. How can people like your parent's have kids, if they do not show any kind of love, or understanding to them. An old phrase come to mind, when my son was seven yrs. old and I had to spank him for something he did, "I did not ask to be born." This phrase applies to you, When you get married and decide to have children you need to think, what kind of a mom, or Dad do I want for my kids,a home full of love or a loveless home.I cannot tell you what to do about your parents, because you do not say how old you are,but you can talk to a school counselor about this problem you all have because it involves your whole family, or talk to someone that you know can help you, in advising you or going with you to talk to the authorities on this personal matter. I know how you must be feeling, because I passed through the same thing you are passing right now,but I grew up and promised myself that I would be a better Mom to my kids than mine was to me,and I did just that.Do not let this ruin your life, I am pretty sure that someone, will be able to help you and I hope that your life will be better for the whole family.

Answer 2

no sweetheart, this is wrong, your parents shouldn't treat you like that. Even the best parent in the world may lose it occasionally and smack their child but what you are talking about seems to be regular abuse. It doesn't matter that they are your parents, clearly they are not coping very well with parenthood. Tell a teacher, or somebody else you trust, about the abuse. It may be your parents need extra help and support.

Never let them tell you it's OK or they have the right to do it, they don't. It's wrong. Don't put up with it.

Answer 3

I believe in spanking. Hitting your face and pulling hair is not spanking.

I get a real sense of what is going on here and it is not right. I really think it is abuse--though maybe not in the legal sense. Your parents are going to be sorry some day that they alienated you.

I wish I had some good advise for you. But, from what I see I am afraid the situation is not going to get better. I suggest you just try to stay out of their way to the extent you can. Be nice to the extent they let you. And appreicate them for what they are giving you.

I wish I had happier or better advise. But I am afraid that is it. Sorry.

Answer 4

This doesn't mean she doesn't love you. You two just have some communication problems and maybe your mom and dad are lacking some good parenting skills. Unfortunately, you don't have to take any classes or get a licence to become a parent. Best you can do is remember this and before you ever become pregnant, be sure it is the right time in your life so you don't resent your child and treat him or her this way. And for goodness sakes, take a parenting class because it doesn't sound like you have good examples at home.

Answer 5

when its appropriate. you may want to look into how child abusers get treated in jail before you go foward with this accusation though. Is your need to out-rank your mother worth putting her thru all that?

btw, if you wanna trade war stories I got some real abuse I could tell you about. Be greatful your parents have the respect for you that they do.

Answer 6

My dad and mom did threaten to spank us. They by no potential did so in public and that they by no potential threaten to spank us "bare backside." They by no potential certainly observed with the aid of with the threats. We by no potential examined them to work out in the event that they have been severe. As a baby i replaced into particular they could and that i replaced into scared to dying of a spanking even even with the undeniable fact that I had by no potential gained one. Now, that i'm an grownup i do no longer somewhat think of they could have observed with the aid of. besides, I do spank my babies. yet i do never get rid of any clothing to spank them so i could by no potential make any such ridiculous possibility. i'm confident their are rules approximately showing your youngster's bare backside in public. So i'm confident if a parent replaced into going to spank bare backside they could desire to flow to a washing room and flow right into a stall to spank them that way (i do no longer consider removing clothing to spank a baby, the only reason dad and mom do this's to attempt to make it as painful as attainable.) If my babies are misbehaving in public then I warn them that i'll swat their bottoms. maximum the time that's all that it takes. yet while they save misbehaving then i'll furnish them one swat on the thoroughly clothed backside. merely as a reminder that i'm severe. If that would not end the misbehavior then i'll take them to the bathing room and flow right into a stall and supply them some swats on the thoroughly clothed backside. i do no longer attempt to embarrass my babies. I merely desire them to be respectful and do what they are advised.

Answer 7

I think that spanking a child if they are misbehaving or being disrespectful to their elders is acceptable, however, there is a big difference between that and abuse. But it is very important that you show them lots and lots of respect in your answers and actions.

Answer 8

maybe it's because of your mother's pride..she doesn't want to be outdone or doesn't want to hear comments from her children...your mom shouldn't do that..children should be allowed to express thier viems, beliefs, or reasons provided that the kids don't say it in a rude way...