Help! My head is spinning and my boyfriend is a liar.?

Question

I just found out that my boyfriend of a year is actually 10 years older than me ( he originally told me 3). I was confused when i found this information and I confronted him about it. He tried to lie but then he admitted it. He wouldn't give me an explanation as to why but I am sure he has a reason. Maybe embarrasment. Anyway he told me he didn't expect to fall in love with me and now he needs to disappear for a while. I am so confused I don't even know what I am supposed to do or how I am supposed to react someone please help me make sense of this.

It's not the number that matters at all if he had told me originally I wouldnt have care at all. It's the lying that bugs me. It's the fact that i don't know what else he is hiding. It's the fact that he could lie about something so stupid and hide it for a year, I love him with all myheart and I don't want to leave him but I don't know if I can trust that he doesnt have babies around the world or ****.
this is what he's said since i posted this....
"i was gonna tell you when i knew i was in love with you but that changed im going to go disappear this will be the last time i speak to you "

Answer 1

Along with this 10 years difference, comes most probably another major relationship. He has lived a lot longer than you and has baggage he is trying to hide. He is reinventing himself by lying to you. The person you thought he was is not truly who he is. Consider cutting your losses. This person has gone way over the line with you. "Not expecting to fall in love." Yeh right. That is his way of not causing any friction with you and just saving face. It does't really look like he meant it. Since you mentioned it to him he could have come clean and apologized. He should then have addressed your relationship and what direction it should take. Did he do this? NO! He ran away because you found him out. The real him probably is not someone you would even like or could ever trust. Let him disappear back to his real life and let go of the fabricated life he presented to you. Life is too short to go on with such a deceiver! Good Luck!

Answer 2

What is weird about this is not that he lied about his age (which many do, although not that drastic), is the fact now that he has to disappear for a while.

I would sever all ties with him, even though I know that would be a shock and hard to do. What if he is married? Is that a possibility? It sounds as if you may have uncovered the first lie on a trail of many. If he isn't hiding other things, why would he run away? I would think he would just beg for your forgiveness and try to get you to stay with him.
Be strong and best of luck to you.

Answer 3

Sweet heart he's a " BOY-FRIEND " not a husband and certainly not your best Friend . Boy-friends are a dime a dozen , your probably a beautiful lady and you can do better then what you've got . If he's lying to you now imagine down the future for yourself , you don't need that kind of relationship , please believe me you can do better . Just in the mirror and ask yourself will you be able to trust him in the future , the right answer will be NO WAY JOSE , just move on with your bad self and learn from this experience and don't do it again .

Answer 4

It was just a white lieover the age and he is hesame person still but why on earth does he need to go away for a while. I think you are supposed to wave goodbye to him and move on. If he loved you he would stay and talk the age thing through but he would not go away just because of that would he? What else is he hiding I wonder. I don't think you will see him again somehow.

Answer 5

1. He's a liar
2. He's not ready for a relationship
3. He may be a nice guy despite this but that does not mean you should sell yourself short.
4. Do not take him back but be nice and forgive him for being incapable of being honest
5. Now walk away and get what you deserve

Sometimes crazy things in life happen. You have all the facts here and can stop the madness. You can do it. :)

Answer 6

maybe the time away from him will help you understand that you dont need him as much as you think you did. So when he goes away take a complete break from him ... dont call dont text dont dp anything. It will hurt like crazy but you will move on quicker than you expected!

There is also a great book called the break up book i think it is for little girls but me and my friends think its great you shoiuld try even just for a laugh.

If he lied about this there may be alot more things too.... good luck

Answer 7

Move on, because if he lied to you about a simple little thing like age, what else could he have lied to you about. He's definetly not the one to be messin' wit if he wasn't planning on a strong relationship in the first place (please, he has a lot of nerve talkin' bout he didn't expect to fall in love wit you).

Answer 8

You poor thing. Hang in there. Some guys are built to be heartbreakers. I know.
You'll be okay, he doesn't sound like he's worth your time and I know right now that's hard to believe. Do what makes you happy honey, take care.

Answer 9

if he has lied about something as small as his age, what other things is he hiding? He has to disappear for a while? Girl get away from him. there maybe things, dangerous things, that he may be exposing you to and you don't even know it. please be careful.

Answer 10

He must have more he's hiding u still don't know about if he's needing to disappear now.

too bad.