i have a potentiol relationship with a man 44 years my senior. now i am a openminded person and he is a good guy, and as openminded individuals we flirt back and forth often. he treats me respectably, and is such a fun person. but it is a big age gap...and theres alot in life i havent experienced. he has...so the question becomes, if its "just sex" even one time, is it wrong? i know the implications of the possible relationship, as he is a good friend who has been a huge help, and i dont want to spoil it, yet the attraction remains and it is with both parties..
please help..
~yulian~
2006-12-07 10:12:19 · 18 answers · asked by yulian1126 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
if you both are of legal age, it doesn't matter what the world has to say or think, its none of their business, if you feel its the right thing to do, and you both want it, then girl go for it. i'm 56 and my girlfriend is 21, we are both of age and we both consent to it, and personally i don't care what you people think or say, you'll get over it. and as for you do as your heart tells you and don't listen to what other people say. if the world would mind their own business the world would be a better place to live.
good luck on your decision.
2006-12-07 10:52:09 · answer #1 · answered by Bird 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you think that the friendship is too precious to risk adding sexuality to it, then don't add sexuality to it. If you think that the friendship would be enriched by adding sexuality to it, then by all means, add away; however, there are some things that you will need to think about (practical things). First, this man is 44 years your senior. If you want to have a life with him, involving marriage and such, remember that you will outlive him by a long time. Any children won't have their father around for very long.
If the attraction you two share is "just sex," that is just fine. Sometimes if you give in to the attraction and have sex, it blows off the tension and makes things easier. The reason that friendships have a tendency of busting up after sex is that the expectations of the two people involved change. One person wants everything to go on as normal while the other person wants things to go in the direction of a relationship instead of a friendship, and it's not always the woman who wants a relationship.
I'm not sure how old you are, but you are going to go through many many life changes before you are done. It's quite possible that in ten years you won't be the same person you are now. Is your friend willing to go through these changes with you, even though he's gone through them himself?
You need to really evaluate and think about what you want out of your friendship with this man. You do have to factor in his age, but only in a practical way. You need to consider your age, your life goals, and how emotionally involved you want to be with this man. Sure, "just sex" is great. It's ok to just have sex with someone. The trick is to know your limits and boundaries, and not to let you or anyone else cross them.
2006-12-07 10:32:34 · answer #2 · answered by Bastet's kitten 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
There have been people who marry with a greater age separation than what you have with this guy ,,,,What I mean to say is that you aren't the only ones that have thought about or have done this ,,,, But sometimes with some young people in this kind of situation ,,, they don't bother to think that this person isn't going to live as long as them and by the time the older person dies of old age the younger person has reached middle age with little or no options left ,,,, For some people it's a tough call to make ,,,, Others have had a ,,,. friends with benefits ,,,, type relationship and it seemed to work out pretty good ,,,, It all depends on how far the younger person in this situation wants to go with it really ,,,, Every one is different and what they do depends on how something like this fits their agenda ,,,, Good luck which ever way you deside ,,,
2006-12-07 10:43:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
once you cross that sex line, you'll never be able to go back and be "just-friends"
no matter what age you are and what are he is, sex should wait, at least until the relationship is serious. that's at least what i would do.
if you are thinking along the lines of "friends-with-benefits", well, that's up to you to decide whether or not that is right or wrong.
also, it's not morally right if you mislead him. don't give him the wrong impression that it is love, if all you want is a little sex..
as far as a relationship, 44 is a huge gap. it could be tough to relate to each other in terms of compatability..
2006-12-07 10:22:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
As long as you're both consenting adults, who cares?
But let's do the math here for a second. Let's say you're 18. That makes him . . . 62. Unless you are the Anna Nicole type, there is absolutely 0% chance of having a meaningful, long-term relationship with someone technically old enough to be your grandfather.
2006-12-07 10:17:13 · answer #5 · answered by Humberto 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'd say 44 years is way to old. If your of age, even I think you should NOT engage in sex. It sounds like you already know the answer, but ask yourself is it him more interesetd in the sex? if so even more NO. If it is you, and you want to experience a different level of your relationship, they you may very well want to engage in sex. As for spoiling it, it will definitely change the dynamic of your relationship.
2006-12-07 10:21:17 · answer #6 · answered by zman70 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It never put Des O'Connor off did it? He is 72 years younbg with a two year old child and a wife 40 or so years younger. I don't think age reaslly matters but if you get involved be aware that you will be a widow quite young and your children may not grow up to know their dad.
2006-12-07 10:16:09 · answer #7 · answered by Closed Down 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wow 44 years thats a pretty big gap so I am guessing if your in your 20s' he is in his 60's If I was you I would try to picture my life with someone that age 10 yrs. down the line and see if you are still excepting of his age
2006-12-07 10:21:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
older men lovie to see women wearing RHT stockings with a garterbelt . try secretsinlace.com
The answer is no its not wrong but becareful the age gap only becomes an issue when you fall in love
2006-12-07 10:17:23 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
a million. in case you have on no account gotten sexy over a guy, below any situation, then that's extremely unbelievable which you're gay/bi. 2. How ought to you think of somebody is sexy yet no longer get grew to become on? i think of you're in simple terms freaking your self out. 3. observing adult males has no longer something to do to outline your sexuality. given which you're attracted to them does that make it easier to recognize something. in elementary terms staring would not do something. 4. in case you think of a guy is warm, then you definately're gay. attempting to think of of something else isn't gonna substitute your sexuality. Be basic with your self. enable your self think of regardless of you opt for and don't attempt to resign it. All you're able to do is settle for regardless of you're. No element in attempting to conceal it from your self. And this confuses me somewhat. You stated you think of a few adult males are warm/sexy, yet a guy has on no account made you no longer difficulty-free? i are not getting that for the period of any respect.
2016-12-18 09:30:34 · answer #10 · answered by lindley 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋