Am I unstable?

Question

Is this a symtom of emotional instability? When I'm in a relationship I find it hard to trust the guy and I constantly wonder if he really likes me or just wants sex. If he is not constantly attentive I get angry and sometimes lash out at him for nothing and become extremely angry like I want to ruin him, over something small. Then when my mind clears I feel bad and apologize. I've had panic attacks, anxiety, and depression in the past but these have been resolved. Now mostly it is just problems I have in interpersonal r/ships, with trust and feeling comfortable with wanting to be close to someone. I am quick to jump to conclusions and get angry at the guy for just what is going on inside my mind. Thanks!!

Answer 1

It sounds like you have trust issues, you have difficulty containing your emotions, and might have anger or control issues.

I recommend you talk to a professional -- they would be much better at walking you through the detailed issues you are having.

Answer 2

Hi, I don't think it's underlining emotional instability. I think theres only a few that can actually say they are emotionaly stable, and I wouldn't consider myself one. I too have felt like you and reacted only to feel ashamed about the very same issue. And sometimes even with my current boyfriend of five years. And with him I know he loves me dearly. And it's almost like clock work. Hmm, he's kissing me? Hmm, he's listening to every word I say? Was that a volunteer to get me a drink from the fridge? Wow! Oh yea, he's "in the mood". Not always but a lot. Guys can in fact be distant. I guess it is "their way". But of course theres those who brake away from the norm, they are few but there out there. And a lot of times when there silent, they really are thinking about nothing. Us women, were programed a little different, and guys (straight guys) don't necessarily run on the same juice. And pretty much a whole different engine. That's how I learned to deal with those little insecurities. And you will find out if he is what you "need" him to be. And by need I mean everything that has to do with two people being in a relationship. Theres always a little give and a little take, but if it's just not comfortable follow your instincs. Now dealing with this might be hard and it might take a long time. Like I said, 5 years ago I started trying to keep my mind from wandering into negativities, and I still do it today. I mean just in my realationship. It's so hard to not think those things. And it also has to do a lot with how you were "programed". How you were raised, your environment (emotionally, visually and such), your genetics all equall to how you react to things now. Even your health can play a part. But once you start trying to brake the cycle and trying to figure out why and where this "insanity" is coming from. Your already on your way to getting rid of it. Maybe try giving him the benefit of the dbout and when you get a little incling of "the feeling" try to remember that you don't want to be like that. I try and do that, sometimes I still explode, it's not so frequent anymore. And it does help when he helps. It may be a 45 minute argument, and whether he knows it or not, I can sometimes find a little tiny bit of help. I got the right answer or I asked the right question, or maybe he reacted a certain way, somewhere there was a little peice of the huge answer I need to solve this dillema. I fear I may never be rid of it. But at least I'll have a hold on it, and he won't have to pay for something he didn't even think of and I won't be miserable thinking all that crap. We'll I hope that helps you. Knowing that I'm not alone helps me. Thanks and good luck!

Answer 3

Don't be so hard on yourself, this may all be part of maturing and you will learn to overcome these impulses to lash out over small things, etc. When I was younger I too had anger issues and afraid to commit to a relationship (overall had relationship problems) and was prone to mood swings, etc. I have matured and have found that I now look at things from a very different perspective; also I went through counseling sessions that I believe helped me in coping with issues such as yours in talking to someone who is trained to help you look at things from a different angle. Hope this helps and again..don't be so hard on yourself!!

Answer 4

Yes, I am not Dr. Phil, but I believe you are unstable. As with any problem, realizing it and admitting it is a very good first step though. Next you should try to figure out why you are this way and how you could overcome it.

Answer 5

maybe you had a bad experience with guys. if you want to know if a guy is about sex just test him. tell him you are not having sex til you get married or not doing it for a year or so. trust is hard for me for girls. i think women love money but hey i'm wrong. go with your intuition and just follow your heart along the way. at one point in our lives, we must trust. love comes to those who have total faith. and trust me we all need love in this cold world.

Answer 6

go to a doctor you may think your ok but you still have promblems we all do your not alone just tell doctor and he can help you become angry free you may need to talk to someone why you are so angrey

Answer 7

i wouldn't call you unstable, but you need help working out some of these issues. i don't know if there is such a thing as relationship panick attacks, but that's almost what it sounds like.

Answer 8

I really don't know... Thank you so much for asking this question though, because I am going through the same thing. If you ever get an answer that seems reasonable, Please let me know. thanks.

Answer 9

Yes there is an issue to be resolved with right guidance lol thanks

Answer 10

if you got food in your belly...don't ***** !...not to mention clean drinking water !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!