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I was wanting to know if anyone else didnt get alone with thier mother in laws. I am having serious problems with mine and she is just creating havic into my marriage and my family life. I wanted to know some good tips on how to deal with this stress. Cause right now I am just wanting to cuss her out and move on but I dont know if that will be the best ideal. Sometimes only people listen to rude people they dont like niceness they seem to listen more when someone is screaming at them.. Well please help me with this one

2006-12-07 09:18:55 · 10 answers · asked by baby_blueeyed_girl_2005 1 in Family & Relationships Family

10 answers

I am going through the same thing as you with my mother in law I don't know your situation but In my situtation I have been married to my husband for a little over 3 months but i have been with him six years. Right after we got married my mother in law thought she was going to dictate the way we spend our holidays that wasn't going to work for me. She basiclly wants all of our time for the holidays and doesn't want to share so we try compromisig with her and nothing is good enough. She doesn't like the fact that my husband is sticking up for me it's making her more mad so we are feuding. They say pick your battles well this one is important to me the holidays are important to spend with both familys not just one. Email me and we can talk about the monster mother in laws:)

2006-12-08 02:32:47 · answer #1 · answered by BabyDolll128 3 · 0 0

My mother-in-law is a two faced witch that says one thing to your face and another behind your back, she has been cold and heartless to my kids and disowned my husband for about a month when we first got married because he had told his kids to grow up when some problems came up. If she needs help then she is all sweet and nice to get what she wants and then she is her normal self. At first I would go off and then realized all this was doing was upsetting my husband even more because no matter what she is his mother so the way we do it around here is if she calls wanting something IF it fits in with our schedule then we go and do it if we are busy with other things we just tell her we can't right now but will as soon as can. We made the ground rule if she comes to our house she will respect it and my kids or she can stay at home. For the most part now my husband will stop by and check on her on his way either to or from work and it is working out a lot better. She still runs her mouth but this way I don't have to deal with it as much and everyone else knows the truth anyway. Just tell your husband that you love him and you married him not his mother, that if it something that has to be done you will help but anything else he can do on his own. Good luck.

2006-12-07 10:04:30 · answer #2 · answered by Martha S 4 · 0 0

Stress can be a terrible thing... Try these ideas:
take a walk around your neighborhood, try to grab your husband once and a while to come with you, or make it a family walk if you have kids

Writing: write a "pretend letter" to your mother in law, write it, get your feelings out, and throw it away... or write a real letter to her and explain your feelings.

Exercise: hit the gym or take up some kind of hobby. (sewing, pottery, swimming (really good exercise) Your local YMCA or community center will have tons of activities.

Remember that you and your husband are together and you should try to spend quality time together... you are married to him, not your mother in law. as much as she gets to you, try to mentally block her out..
Screaming does not sovle anything and will cause tremendous tension in your life..

If you are newly married, she could just be acting possessive with her son (your husband). Maybe she still feels like she needs to take care of him.

Good luck,

2006-12-07 09:26:54 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Cussing her out isn't a very good option. You can do a couple different things: talk to her rationally like an adult and work the problems you two have out, or just basically ignore her, see her when you have to and be civil to her. If she's doing all this on purpose and you are letting it get to you then she knows she accomplishing what she set out to do. Live your life normally, don't let her interfere and be sure to let your hubby know whats going on between the two of you.

2006-12-07 09:22:25 · answer #4 · answered by Rawrrrr 6 · 1 0

Study and Job each in combination well have to be very tiring after which caring for the house. Following idea might support. one million. It is bigger you rent any one to care for your mom in legislation. two. You cant difference your mom in legislation so modify to the drawback. Move out ordinarily for dates together with your hubby and experience lifestyles. Watch film do matters that make you completely satisfied. three Keep yourself busy at house, Just forget about sour phrases and transfer on, everybody has correct to speech. Mother in legislation are precise supply her a few care, purchase her a few attire, take her out too and spot the change. Best of success

2016-09-03 10:45:31 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

The only real way a mother-in-law can cause havoc in your marriage is if your spouse allows it. So your real beef is with your spouse not her. It's time to address the problem with your spouse...

Mothers tend to put their nose where it doesn't belong...but they think they do have a right... And if hubby allows it, it won't go away.

2006-12-07 09:24:46 · answer #6 · answered by westfield47130 6 · 0 0

That's right. Sometimes you just have to get bitchy with people before they start listening. If you've asked her kindly before to butt out of your life and she hasn't complied. Then you have no other choice.

2006-12-07 09:24:15 · answer #7 · answered by sheila c 3 · 0 0

Wow babydoll the EXACT same thing with my in laws, lol that's crazy! She wants us to just to go over her house for the holidays and nobody elses, I remember last year we went to my moms for a few hours on Thanksgiving and she was PISSED about it. And she's over spends on presents for my son just to try to make my family jealous, and the funny thing is they don't know what all she gets for my son, I don't even tell them. And she tries to compete with me with everything omg it's so annoying. Just like I started to lose weight and after I told her now she's trying to be on the same diet I am. But she's not doing it right. I was a pretty big girl, was at a whopping 500lb but lost 200 lbs so far, she looks me up and down. My sis in law is the same she likes to call me fat A and she doesn't have room to talk cause I'm down to almost her weights size. We should make a Monster in law page on Facebook or something, LOL!!!

Show more affection to your husband in front of her and be nice, if she says something rude just ignore it. It will PISS her off! Show that she doesn't bother you. That's what I do, when we was friends on facebook I even did it on there. My in laws try to break us apart and what's so funny it just made us even stronger. And your husband needs to put his foot down with them and say hey this is where I draw the line, that's enough or else.

2014-07-23 12:27:53 · answer #8 · answered by ©Mysti and Kenneth© 1 · 0 0

If she lives with you, better you talk to her you need more space or her son will be very stressed.
I lived with mine, long tome ago, and believe me, was the worst thing that happened to me and my marriage.
Good luck!

2006-12-07 09:23:30 · answer #9 · answered by andromedah42 3 · 0 0

Remember the old you can catch more flies with honey that vinegar saying and try practicing that a bit more... it may just throw her off guard....try speaking with your husband.. :o)

2006-12-07 09:23:13 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

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