I work with a girl who is around my age (20's), we are the only two people in the building in their 20's.
I don't like her company very much, but I keep it polite and friendly at work. She keeps asking me to hang out with her outside of work, and I have to come up with excuses everytime to avoid it.
My boyfriend thinks I should hang out with her once atleast to be nice.
What do you think?
2006-12-07 08:09:34 · 18 answers · asked by Seven Costanza 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I forgot to mention that she has been asking me everyday for a month.
I'm running out of excuses. She just can't seem to get the hint.
2006-12-07 08:18:12 · update #1
Tell her that you go to work to work, not to make friends and that you prefer to keep your professional life professional and your private life private. At the very most generous, just go have lunch with her but you don't even need to do that. Good for you for always being polite!
2006-12-07 08:20:52 · answer #1 · answered by krobin 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How about ordering in some deli sandwiches and having lunch together in the office? Since you're the only person in her age range in the bldg, that's probably why she keeps asking you to socialize with her. If you have lunch "in" the office, you can call the shots- after 20 minutes or so, if you want to break away, just say you have to go back to your desk, since you're waiting for a call or email. But you may also find you enjoy her company more than you expected and may want to get together after work. And you might find she has personal connections that could help you with future career goals. Ya never know!
2006-12-07 08:22:01 · answer #2 · answered by GEEGEE 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Just be honest with her and try to spare her feelings. Let her know that you like her as a person but hanging out with co-workers outside of work isn't something you feel comfortable doing because it can cause potential problems in the workplace.
Don't tell her you don't like her company because that will just piss her off. You are right to be polite and friendly to her but it is just as important to be honest.
Good luck!
2006-12-07 08:39:26 · answer #3 · answered by 6bits 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm....
Well, you shouldn't make yourself hang out with someone who you don't enjoy spending time with, but as others have said, she could be different outside of work.
If however you're pretty sure that she would be the same outside work as she is at work, then all you can do is quietly explain to her that you keep your work and your social lives separate.
Thinking about it, if your office has a Christmas party and you are both going, then you'll get the opportunity to chat to her there and at the same time, you can escape by making sure you chat to everyone there- that way, she can't monopolizes your time.
2006-12-07 08:27:29 · answer #4 · answered by darth_timon 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dont think you should hang out with her outside of work just to be nice. If you dont want to, dont. I would just continue to be polite and friendly at work. If you continue to give excuses for not hanging out with her she will eventually get the hint.
2006-12-07 08:15:58 · answer #5 · answered by SarahL 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would hang out and see if she is some one you might like to be around. I don't hang out with co- workers because it has caused problems at work, but that was my experience. Give her a chance and see what happens. She may very well end up being a really good friend one day...............
2006-12-07 08:18:59 · answer #6 · answered by littlegoober75 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You don't have to hang out with the folks from work if you don't want too, just let the person know you never mix work and your private life... That should take care of the problem... Would you want someone to hang out with you just to be polite? Don't think so... :-)
2006-12-07 08:20:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe compromise and go to lunch with her one day, maybe you find something you like about her. I know that there was a woman I worked with that I couldn't stand, but when I finally broke down and went to lunch with her I found we had a lot in common and we were able to make good ground. I just didn't like working with her, but as friends we did fine.
2006-12-07 09:42:13 · answer #8 · answered by Heather S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may not like her company but she may be your new best friend. You'd think that you'd at leas think that she's got good taste if she wants to hang out with you! Give her a chance. Ditto on the lunch thing.
2006-12-07 08:42:51 · answer #9 · answered by GLSigma3 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You answered your own question " I don't like her company very much" so why would you want to hang out with her after work? Evidently there is something triggering your intuition about her that you don't care for.
2006-12-07 08:18:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋