Am I right to hate both of them?. We took our premature twins to mother in law's house?

Question

(MIL's) house for the first time (2 months old) she told me that she would not have her huge dog in the house. When we arrived there was a note on the door that said "come on in", the dog was in the house and MIL was no where to be found. My husband takes the dog and puts it in a spare bedroom and shut the door. The twins and I are in another bedroom (pumping breast milk) while my husband and his friend are in the living room and MIL arrives home. She comes into the room and I asked her to leave because I feel uncomfortable with my breasts exposed. She ran and told my husband that I would not let her see the babies. Then the dog got loose. I am trying to exit the room with one baby in my arm. The dog tries to get around me to the other baby. I call for help, nobody listens until I say I'm going to kill this Bleeping dog. She calls me a nasty wench. I went off, got my kids and left. Husband blames me, you can't come in someone house and tell them what to do with their dog.

Answer 1

Seems to me that you are not receiving the support you need but don't start out with new babies and hate in your heart. It is destructive and no winners, I promise you. Ask your husband to invite his parents and all of you sit down and talk this out calmly. Explain what was happening and how you felt. Others may not agree but you can agree to disagree and be respectful of one another.

Answer 2

WOW what a day for you with two new babies. Your MIL should have knoewn you were coming and put the dog outside while you and the babies were in the house. If you are uncomfortable with breast feeding in front of people you have every right to ask until you are done for them to see or hold the babbies. They are your **** for christ sake. Your MIL should not be offended by that thats called respect for a new mother. your husband is of course defending his parents thats normal you need to have a talk not a fight about the respect that you demand as a new mother you feel your privacy and respect have been violated by your MIL and he should be understanding and on your side. Have him cll his mom and tell her that the TWO OF YOU are uncomfortable with having the dogs around the babies and if you come over could she put them out for a little bit. that is not to much to ask.

Answer 3

I think your husband is dead wrong and that you have every right to be angry. What a lot of people don't realize is that premature babies are more likely to get sick then full term babies. Besides that there have been cases of dogs attacking children. Your mother in law should have been more concerned about the health and well being of her grandchildren than her f*cking dogs and so should your husband. She is the nasty wench and to h*ll with her, if she cannot understand why you don't want her dogs around your babies. My goddaughter was a preemie and when we were finally blessed to have her come visit our home, I was more than happy to dust and disinfect my entire home the day before she came and I made sure that everyone that came in contact with her washed their hands and that no one had the sniffles or anything that could make her sick. She is now about to turn 3 (her birthday is Saturday) and she is a healthy, beautiful young lady. Congratulations on your new babies, I wish them good health and happiness and I hope that your husband realizes that he was wrong and that you are only concerned with the well being of your babies, as any good mother would be.

Answer 4

Your husband should have been on your side. You did not tell your MIL that she couldnt see the babies, you just ask her for some privacy to feed the baby. I would have said worse to her. She told you that she would not have the dogs in the house when you came, but she did. She should be more concerned about her new grandbabies than the dogs at that point. You are correct here.

Answer 5

I don't know that I would hate them. Maybe next time you and your family don't go into the house unless the Mother-In-Law is home. Ask her to please put the dog up. Also ask if there is some where you can go if needed to pump. (She sould understand if she was a mother too). MIL will always try to trun things around because that's their baby boy that you took away from them. Good Luck with everything hope it works out and you can all get along.

Answer 6

Sounds like a misunderstanding turned into a dramatic reading...

Honestly, let go. Don't go over to your MIL's house with the kids until she is willing to play the game right. Try to talk to her and tell your husband as the mother of his children you felt uncomfortable with the dogs and having your boobs exposed to his mom. If he has an issue with that, draw a picture for him...ask him if he would feel comfortable having his junk showing infront of your momma.

Also, tell him the dog could have nocked you and the baby over and you could have easily caused injury to the kid because his momma didn't follow through with the promise.

Answer 7

Hate Yes, Dislike what your husband did is very understandable. He should have been man enough to have your back.. You are his wife and you have reason to not want pets around your premature twins.. As a mother of premature kids I do understand they can get sick at the drop of a hat. So we do have to be careful of their immune systems they are still at a delicate age.. Your husband should understand this, it is not saying ,You want to tell your MIL what to do in her house.. but have the respect to understand That you as a first time mother(if that is the case) Would like to be acknowledge and respected when it comes to your children.. I feel your husband and MIL should apologize to you.. And explain this to your husband that these are his children as well and GOD Forbids if anything ever happened how would he feel.. Would he blame you or blame his mother..The Blame should be were it stands and that is with him , he should have stood by you and his children.. If he didnt want a family he should get a vasectomy and leave the children to you.. He doesn't need to put anymore stress on you because raising 2 premature babys is a job in itself and you need his support. Not his redicule.. So You see take it one day at a time.. Both of my kids were premies my oldest is 25 he stayed in the hospital for 6 months when he was born.. And my youngest is 18 he stayed in the hospital for 1 month.. My daughter was born at 6 months but she didnt make it. So as a mother of premature births... I do understand where you are coming from GOD BLESS you and your new family... And for the record Don't pay the MIL any mind she feels you took her son away from her... So she feels insecure raise your family and don't let negative upset you enjoy every moment with your angels.. They deserve a healthy and happy mother... Don't let noone upset you because our children feel when we are in pain and you dont want that for your children you want them to be happy and healthy. GOD BLESS and GOOD LUCK

Answer 8

Just let me tell ya this. Right now your #1 priority is those baby's. If you do not want dog around baby's your mil should respect that. Yea, it may be her house but they are your children!!! If she wants to see baby's and she can't respect your privacy or your wishes then tell her she can come to your house. Plain and simple!!! I have similar thing going on with my mom. She is a smoker and my husband and myself are not and we also NEVER cuss in front of our kids, matter of fact we hardly even cuss. But she smokes like a freight train and cusses like a sailor and has never baby sat for us!!!! Her attitude is ( It's my house and I will do what ever I want in it) She says smoke never hurt my kids!!! Well unfortunately it does hurt , second hand smoke is very bad for kids. With all this said, you stick to your guns!!! They are your babys, and if she wants to see them bad enough she will stop being so difficult. Don't back down hun! Good Luck

Answer 9

I would be pissed! Premature twins only at the age of 2 months and your hubby is on her side? Your MIL is a disrespectful, selfish woman who shouldn't have the right to have a daughter in law such as yourself. I don't know if I would be comfortable with my OWN mother seeing my breast! Good luck, but keep in mind...you aren't the only one...wanna trade MIL's? Think hard on that one!

Answer 10

That would my last little visit with her with my babies, if she wants to come over tell her to be sure and not bring Rover with her. If she brought it I'd lock that door and not answer it and she could be on her way. Listen dogs are jealous sometimes of babies and they will hurt them My babies would be well protected and I'd her son to keep MIL away from my house.