ok if you're going to be a jerk and judgemental dont botha, otherwise, Help!?

Question

Ok, as some of you may look and see i have been asking a lot of questions lately. My boyfriend is in a group home because his dad died when he was young and had no other family to go to. So he was in and out of foster homes. He got in some trouble yesterday for getting in a fight and is supposed to be getting some time in Lakeview. A detention center for boys. He will be there for 6 months to a year. I think i am pregnant but i wont be 18 till July. I want to have this baby. But my grandpa will not let me. He has guardianship over me. If he finds out i will be in deep ****. My boyfriend is also wanting to run today until after christmas so he can spend it with me and his mom whom he hasn't seen since he was 3. He's had it really rough. i love this boy and we are gonna get married when he gets outta where he be going. I just don't know what to do about being pregnant and not telling my grandpa. can i keep it a secret till July, at least from him? it's an upheavel of madness

woops when i said he wants to run. I meant run to avoid the detention center not to run from me.

Answer 1

Well, you'll certainly be showing by July. I suppose you could wear loose cloths and give the impression that you'e just gaining weight all over.

Have you thought about what you & your guy will do when he gets out? Where you'll live, who's going to work and where, etc.

If there's any way you can, you'll be improving your chances at success if you can get some kind of job training now while you're living at home. Once you've moved out and had your baby, you might not have that chance again.

It'll be a real struggle for you guys on your own with a baby and there's no gaurantee that your relationship will last. I'm not saying that because of your age, but because of the statistically hight divorce rate. Just try to look at all the pros and cons. Hope for the pros but prepare for the cons.

I understand why your bf has gotten into trouble. I was young once and I've been where he is. The reality of all my youthful mistakes came back to haunt me when I became an adult, but I was able to work through it. It's probably going to be tough, but he can too. Good luck to the both of you.

P.S. Whether your grandfather finds out or not is not nearly as important as getting thatprenatal care so be sure to do that. Dont' worry about being kicked out either. There are organizations that can help you get an apartment of your own.

Answer 2

First off, he shouldn't run. He should take his time because if he doesn't he could get alot more time and lets say he goes in to that detention center he would be there the majority of your pregnancy better to be there while you are pregnant then to be there when you have a 1-2 year old.
Is your grandpa abusive? He has no power over whether you have a baby or not. Are you scared to tell him because he may hurt you? Or are you just scared? If I were you I would go to a county clinic that specializes in pregnancy. They should be able to point you in the right direction, there may be a home you could go to till you have the baby. I would not hide it from your gpa you need support and need to see the doctor and that is really hard to hide from a family member.
Good Luck!

Answer 3

First, to be really a good GF you need to convince this guy not to run. It will only worsen the situation for him, you and any baby that may be on the way.

Can you be an encouragement to him? Can you help him to be patient, hold his temper, do his time with some dignity and self respect? I think that's the very best way to love him (and yourself) at the moment. Your lives can begin much quicker if he can put this in the past. Help him to grow up during this time. Be his rock.

Don't borrow trouble. If you do find you are pregnant get someone to help with gpa. He can't make you abort and you actually may show very little by July, but I would suggest you tell him soon as you need some prenatal care as soon as you find out. DO take this situation in hand.

Be proactive in your life. Make things happen. Don't just settle for the way they happen to you, dealing with the consequences as they come. Start with the boyfriend (if you intend to keep him) and worry about the pregnancy if and when it becomes a reality. But do act - not just react and good luck to you.

Answer 4

Having a baby is a huge responsibility.
I hope you realize that.
Can you fully provide for your baby? Because if you don't, things will quickly become from bad to worse. I know it's too late to say you should've had safe sex. I also know that abortion is an awfull thing. So it's hard no matter what you choose.
I really can't give you an advice on this. It's such a awfull situation for you and your boyfriend. I think you should seek help.
Find out if there are ways for you to SAFELY keep your baby. Start thinking about the future of you and your baby.
Get a job if you don't allready have one. And when your boyfriend gets out, he should try to keep out of trouble, so that he can get a job aswell. That is really important. You'll need money for your child.
Does your boyfriend want this baby?
If not, you'll be alone in it. You need to think ahead.
And find some help. FAST.
I wish you all the best.
I really hope it all works out.

Answer 5

super question! as we communicate, the be conscious, judgmental, in itself, connotes some experience of unexamined self-righteousness that, in actuality, isn't authentic. As such, that is been getting a foul rap throughout many of the previous fifty years or so. To be human is to be judgmental. as an occasion, I and all human beings else that spoke back to this question -or, for that count, desperate to bypass in this question- had to make a judgement, whether wittingly or not. You, faster or later make a call to ask and submit the question ... therein is the essence of judgement. As such, i'm not in simple terms judgmental, yet thankfully so as this is between the serious factors of our human insignia. Do I continuously recent sensible judgements ... now this is a query for yet another day.

Answer 6

Do you have a female family member who could help ease the blow to gandpa? This sounds like a rough deal but stay focus you have another human to raise better than the father was . Dont let your boyfriend run face the music and this could all be behind him sooner! running is not the answer. good luck and stay healthy.

Answer 7

time to be a grown up. make good decisions for your child. getting mixed up with a mixed up kid is only going to send you down a long, hard, dysfunctional road. niether one of you is in any position to be supporting and having a real life, for your baby.
having a baby and being married is very, very hard work, it takes maturity, and commitment. you sound like you have neither.(running away,lying to grandpa). do not make more mistakes, fix the ones you are in now.

Answer 8

NOONE can force you to get an abortion...when he notices then tell the truth and say youre keeping the child

Answer 9

Get some help and get some counseling. There are clinics to go to or go to any church and ask for some help.