My 10 year old still poops his pants. Any advice?

Question

He is wide awake when he does this. He knows it's wrong and his mom and I have yelled, spanked and grounded him. Is he so pathetically lazy that he would rather walk around with a crap filled *** than go to the bathroon. I'm at my wits end with the kid.

Answer 1

First off, I want to tell you that you should not worry too much about this. My younger brother used to do the same thing when he was about the same age. Here are just a few methods my parents used that seemed to work pretty well.

When you question him about what he does, whether you sound like it or not, it can make him feel like he is a baby, and hopefully he doesn't want to feel that way. Just make it sound a lot like a normal conversation with no accented words or large ones for his vocabulary.

Moving along, if there has been any changes in things done around the house (i.e. new hours/job(s) for mom/dad, new neighbors, or other things), it might contribute to this new behavior. Don't talk down upon him for doing this but at the same time make sure he knows that children of his age do not perform this act.

It is also possible he might feel insecure about school. He may be going through a rough time there, be it for what he is doing or just your regular run of the mill bullying. None the less, try to figure out if something is happening at school.


Possible solutions:

1) Make HIM clean his own underwear - in doing so he will be (hopefully) disgusted by having to clean up after himself shortly after you implement this suggestion.

2) Give constant reminders to use the restroom. With my younger brother, they had a secret word that only we, my parents and the two of us, knew about. If we were in public, they would say this word and sometimes(*keyword*) without question he would get up and go use the restroom. They did this so as to not embarass him in front of friends, family and other people.

3) Take him to see a doctor, it is possible that there might be something wrong with the muscle that effects his bowel movements. It may also be possible that it is just weak and you might just have to work with him on strenghtening that muscle.

4) I don't normally recommend this last one, but because of his age it might work effectively. The reason I don't normally recommend this last one is because if used it has a 50/50 chance of some psychological problems ensueing afterwards. It might cause more problems than solve. But my suggestion is to use a scare tactic on him. In his case, the scare tactic would be that you would put him back into diapers. Tell him that if he doesn't start acting his age when it comes to the toilet, then he will have to wear them 24/7. Hopefully, if everything goes according to plan, he will stop this infantile act and your laundry load will be smaller.

To be honest, there is no sure fire way to aid you but I do hope that my advice can give you some help as you deal with this.

Answer 2

My son is 10 as well and we just had an experience in school recently. The principal called me at work to tell me that my son stepped in another kids poop and tracked it through the classroom. He wanted me to know before my son came home to tell me this "far out" story and me not believe him.

He said this isn't the first time the kid has messed his pants and just walked around school like nothing happened. Only this time it fell out his pant leg and he never bothered to tell anyone.

My son had to go to the janitor's office to have his shoes disinfected and the kids had to clear the room so it could be cleaned up. I just thought it awful strange for a 10-year old to be pooping his pants. I would think the harassment from the other kids would be more than enough to make him stop.

There must be something more to it. If I were you, I'd sit him down and have a looong talk with him to find out if something is going on. And if that doesn't' work take him to see a doctor.

Answer 3

i do no longer comprehend in case you're sharing a room or no longer yet i'm confident it may be maximum grotesque regardless. i'm presuming that there is not any longer a scientific situation for this?? then lower back, you may ask your brother to place the pants someplace daily. tell him that if he won't placed them interior the wonderful place you will placed them interior the trash. If he has no undies left then he won't manage to poop in them, will he now? if your parents comprehend that the undies is going interior the bin a minimum of it gets their interest and that they could cope with the subject - the two get some scientific help or some psychological help because of the fact your brother needs one or the different. stable luck. wish issues improve quickly.

Answer 4

Yelled, spanked and grounded him. Mmm hmm.

Why haven't you taken him to the doctor to find out what the problem is? Something is definitely wrong, here. Your son needs some help with this.

Your doctor may be able to do tests, etc. Or, at least refer you to a specialist or a counselor.

Don't automatically assume that your son is at fault. He may not be able to control this.

Answer 5

Take him to the doctor; I doubt this is pure laziness. I had a similar problem with a youngster until we found out that 1 out of every 10 kids is born with an underdeveloped tract system that allows for much discomfort during a bowel movement.

We used an enema for a couple of weeks as well as Metamucil shakes for a month or so; things started to kickstart on their own after that.

Answer 6

it certainly isn't a good sign that you are on the web calling your own child "pathetically lazy." maybe you are a big part of the problem. I really hope you do not talk to your child this way. He is trying to get attention from you (and it sounds like he is accoustomed to negative attention--which is better than no attention at all). Why don't you try kind words, hugs, and therapy for you.

Answer 7

Don't beat the poor kid. I bet he is sick. I say the next time you take him to the doctor you should mention that. Don't beat him for pooping in his pants. That's really horrible. Maybe he can't help it. My firend Sara stopped pooping in her pants when she was 15. Surprisingly she stopped and turned out OK. Also, when I was 9 and still peed in bed, my father would make me clean the matress, it was pretty bad. I guess it worked because I get up in the middle of the night now to go to the bathroom because I don't want to have to clean up the matress. I don't believe that your son is lazy because it must be embarassing for him.

Answer 8

Usually, this is an sign of emotional distress.
I would serious advise you to take him to a counselor.
I friend of mine's son was crapping in his pants and it turned out to be a kid that was bullying him at school.
He was eight.

Your approach of yelling, spanking and grounding doesn't seem to be working.

Tough love isn't always the answer.
I must add, I'm a firm believer in discipline and punishment, but if a child feels unloved in that area, your discipline is just going to aggravating the condition.

He is your son.
Just love him unconditionally.

Answer 9

Sounds to me he might need to see someone on a professional basis.A ten year old doing this seems to be more than a laziness issue,a lot more.There may be some deep-seeded reason he is acting out this way.I would seek help right away.Best of luck.

Answer 10

All I can say is hopefully he will grow out of it. Or may be he has a bowl probably that is why he doesn't make it in time. Some times my 7 year old does not make it in time but he will change his clothes right away.