ok i just got married, im pregnant, and im having some man trouble, maybe you can help me...
i am good looking, i have a gentle personality, i am committed, and i am encouraging to my husband...
so if you had a wife like that, would you be lying to her all the time? and do things behind her back? is it me? what would i have to do to make him stop? i want to trust him... i am trying, but he wont stop hurting me... but i love him and i have so much hope for him... will he ever change? or can i do anything(but not try to get even with him) to help him? i need to know whats going on inside his head!
2006-12-07 01:52:15 · 9 answers · asked by jessica c 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You need to leave. You're going to put yourself through some BS & it's going to tear you down. Don't do that to yourself. Get out now!!!!
2006-12-07 02:43:04 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey U make a good wife .....
(ok... that's subjective.... May be this is what U see abt ur self )... He might not feel that !!!
The current situation is that He does not feel that... If he had felt it he wudn't have hurt U...
If U believe that U love him, dont try to Change him...
Change Urself to fit his slot of "Perfect Wife / Perfect Love"...
U do Ur best... Change into a Person he wants to see U as...
He'll definitely realise U are taking pains to be and get his love...
Keep smiling always.... Enjoy...
All the best...
PS: About counselling ... I wud differ... cos that essence of counselling is lost if both do not take it in the right sense... Can U convince him to get it ??? I dont think so...
2006-12-07 02:04:37 · answer #2 · answered by Fifa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Fielding a guess: your man may have the "madonna/whore" syndrome. Before you were married, he saw you as a "madonna", and now that you are pregnant (with HIS baby no less!) he may subconsciously see you as "whore" because by being pregnant you can no longer be "madonna" (virgin). Whatever it is you need to both get into marital counseling, pronto. You can't change other people - they have to want to change. However, right now it sounds like he is acting like a total jerk. Get counseling for both of you. If he refuses, you may have to give him an ultimatum - wise up or get out.
2006-12-07 01:59:05 · answer #3 · answered by Paul H 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you need to sit down to him and lay down the rules. If he doesnt abide by them, you might have to move on. That is unfortunate for the baby. You might also try counseling. Maybe if he hears it from someone elses mouth, it will hit home. Can he change? That is really up to him. You cant change people, but you can give them options. Hopefully he will choose the right option.
2006-12-07 01:55:02 · answer #4 · answered by hank 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Repeat after me: "I CANNOT CHANGE HIM."
You marry the man he is, not the man you'd like him to become.
You sound awesome :) May he realize what he has before it's too late.
Couples counseling may make that happen. I recommend it emphatically.
2006-12-07 01:54:27 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
tell him what you wrote here.
you should not stay with a man who will not be trustworthy to you. you seem like a nice person and you deserve better.
tell him that the two of you JUST got married now he has to change his ways and act like a married man now or you will find something better to occupy yourself with.
2006-12-07 01:55:21 · answer #6 · answered by The Weed Fairy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bottom line,, he needs to know what he can lose due to the lies,, when he has lost you the baby and his marriage he may figure it out,, but remember,, hes a guy, He needs to be responsible for his actions, if he lies,,, cut him off from the nooky
2006-12-07 02:00:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hun it sounds like you just have a jerkoff for a husband, and you arent gonna change that, sorry. good luck to you!
2006-12-07 01:57:09 · answer #8 · answered by Brian 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Counseling is definite answer for him and maybe you.
2006-12-07 01:54:30 · answer #9 · answered by finished 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋