Should I approach her and if so how do I with out sounding accusing?
2006-12-07 01:22:56 · 27 answers · asked by anthony 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Do a semen test, http://www.semen-test.net
2006-12-07 01:24:57 · answer #1 · answered by pekaboo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whatever it is that she's doing (or not doing) that brings you to think she's cheating, you need to give some thought and determine if it's valid enough to make you suspect that she is.
Second, you need to trust your gut - most people don't, and end up regretting it
Third, what if she is? What will you do? You need to have an answer for that before you find out for sure, that way you'll be prepared
Fourth, remember that it's the holidays. if she's simply not at home as much or something like that, she may be out shopping, or she MAY even be working on a really nice gift for you.
Fifth, once you get an answer to the question above (the third point) ask her about it. Don't accuse her of cheating. Just ask her what the deal is, and watch her reaction. Then go from there
2006-12-07 09:37:58 · answer #2 · answered by Mister 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all if you have not spoke to her and both agreed to only date each other exclusively (including sexual relations) then you don't have much to say to her because you have not committed to that level of the relationship nor has she
If you have then first try initiating a conversation like
You know sweetheart it makes me happy that we are in a committed and monogamous relationship
her reaction to that statement might give you a clue as to where her intentions are, read her body language if she seems uneasy or standoffish then back away from the relationship some, if she makes less of an effort to be with you then whats the point of knowing whether she was cheating or not, it will only cause you unnecessary hurt, always be respectful of her feelings as a person just like you would want her to treat you
2006-12-07 09:55:45 · answer #3 · answered by Gary N 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as she's taking care of business where you're concerned, don't worry about it...for one, there would be nothing you could do about it if she was hanging out with another guy. And, if she isn't, approaching her about something like that will make her think you're an obsessive nutcase. Just ride it till the wheels fall off and if it turns out that she finds someone else more enchanting than yourself, let it die it's own natural death. Nothing is forever, just be happy you had her attention for the peiod of time you did and move on...
2006-12-07 09:27:35 · answer #4 · answered by wetdreamdiver 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you engaged ? Have you made promises of fidelity to each other already ? What basis of commitment are you using for an allegation of cheating and then what deeds of hers violate that promise ?
AFTER you have settled these issues in your head, go for coffee midday in a relatively quite place and tell her you have a question. Remind her of the promise of monogamy and then tell her about the incident that makes you think she has changed her mind & decided not to honor that promise.
You are NOT married yet to avoid words like cheating and others like it, just try to find out if she had "changed her mind" and wants to see other people. Be calm but very firm about the reasons you have come to this and tell her you want a straight honest answer.
Good luck, our prayers are with you . . .
2006-12-07 09:32:23 · answer #5 · answered by kate 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't approach her without sounding accusing. Look for the signs and wait till you have proof.
Or, better yet, begin ignoring her and see what her reaction is. If she is indifferent or even happy, then yea, she's cheating on you.
2006-12-07 09:26:00 · answer #6 · answered by stn1225 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What exactly have you caught her doing that makes you think that she is cheating? That is an important question. If it is something silly let it go. But if it is something serious I would just tell her that whatever she did left me feeling suspicious about her.
And I would like to know what is going on. Watch her reactions, if you have been dating for a while then you'll know by her reaction and if you can't tell then you will just have to decide what to do from there.
2006-12-07 09:30:10 · answer #7 · answered by Jamie M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust your instincts. They never lie. If u feel like she's cheating, she is. So I want u to do the same. And don't tell her. So if she ever comes out and admits it, it won't hurt that bad because you will have been doing the same. Peace player.. Keep ya head up.
2006-12-07 09:28:35 · answer #8 · answered by Da Jedi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand how you feel...i've been in a situation where my my girl did cheat on me and in a few where they did not. i think the first thing to do is analyze and compare you relations with the past record. with the FOCUS on finding evidence that she is NOT cheating. we tend to look at the most innocent thing in a corrupt manner cuz we are looking for evidence that our partner IS cheating you should aim to prove yourself wrong and thats when you see more clearly
2006-12-07 09:34:15 · answer #9 · answered by Super Brown 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How about you initiate a conversation whereby you highlight the importance you place on monogamy and treating othrers as you wish to be treated.
If you handle the conversation well, you should be able to gauge her guilt by her reaction to this subject.
I hope she's not for your sake dude.
2006-12-07 09:32:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no..don't approach her without facts. Go around her, approach the other resources that make you think these things..
2006-12-07 11:42:48 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋