Pay rise Request - little bit rude (joke)?

Question

Pay Rise request

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following
reasons:I do physical labor.  I work at great depths.  I plunge headfirst into everything I do.  I do not get weekends or public holidays off. I work in a damp environment.  I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.  I work in high temperatures.  My work exposes me to contagious diseases.

Sincerely,
P. Niss

The Response:

Dear Penis:

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

You do not work 8 hours straight.  You fall asleep after brief work
periods.  You do not always follow the orders of the management team. you do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations.  You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working. You leave the workplace rather >messy at the end of your shift.  You leave the workplace rather
>messy at the end of your shift.  You do not always observe necessary
>safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.  
>You will retire well before you are 65.  You are unable to work double
>shifts.  You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have
>completed the assigned task.
>
>And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and
>exiting
>the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.
>
>Sincerely,
>V. Gina

Answer 1

LOL. LOL. LOL.

You Go, Girl. Kudos to you. 10.

Thank you for the laughter. You have a really great evening.

Answer 2

Brilliant.

Answer 3

Miss Moo, good joke but I already knew it.
Felix, Nice one m8. Heard something like it as well, but in a dif way.

Answer 4

One in return -

It was approaching 7.30 and the young executive had had a very hard day. He watched his boss walking into the conference room for an important meeting and knew he'd be safe for at least an hour, so he sprinted up to the Sky Bar Lounge on the 57th floor, hoping to catch the last thirty minutes of happy hour, when cocktails were half price.

As he walked in, the barman was pouring a double slammer of Tequila sour for a very handsome executive looking guy.

The guy slammed the Tequila, knocking it down in one gulp, got up off the bar stool, walked over to the window, opened it, climbed out and jumped.

In shock the young executive ran over to the window, but couldn't see the ground from where he was. Not knowing what to do he ordered a very dry Martini from the barman, and sat there, staring into space. The barman continued polishing glasses and dusting the bar, preparing for the evening, and appeared to be totally unfazed.

The young exec got out his cell phone, placed it on the bar in front of him, preparing to call the police, and possibly an ambulance, or even the local news station. Not knowing what to do next, and still extremely shocked by what had happened, he finished off his drink, when, in through the door the handsome young exec returned, ordered another Tequila slammer, double, very sour, knocked it back in one, walked over to the window, climbed out, and disappeared into space one more time.

This time, the poor young guy was extremely perplexed and sat there, gobstruck, staring at his reflection in the mirrored bar.

After five minutes the handsome young guy sauntered back into the bar, as if nothing had happened.

''What the hell did you do?'' He blurted out, just as the handsome young guy was sitting back down and ordering another Tequila, double, slammer, extra sour, please.

''Well, I have no idea, really.'' He began to explain. ''It must be something to do with the way this guy makes the Tequilas. You see, I seem to drop very fast at first, then, just around the third or second floor I slow right down, and land very softly on my feet. Watch.'' He knocks the next Tequila back in a oner, gets up, walks over to the window, climbs out, and disappears into the night, one more time.

Astonished is not the word. This young executive has never, ever let any opportunity go by, and this, he can't believe.

''Barman, Tequila, please.'' He says. ''Make it a double, sour, slammer, just exactly like the ones you made for him.''

He knocks it back in one, and before the barman can realize what is happening, he walks quickly over to the window, climbs up, and drops into space.

Just then, the handsome young exec reappears, just like before. This time the barman is sweating and shaking, and looking really pissed off. ''Superman,'' He says, ''You know, you are such an asshole when you get drunk.''

Answer 5

True, unfortunately! lol 10 / 10

Answer 6

dont understand the question,can you repeat it 3 or 4 times?

Answer 7

Ouch - the truth hurts!!!

BTW

What's the difference between a Penis and Bonus?


Your wife will blow your bonus!!!!

Answer 8

This calls for a HIGH "10"!!!

Great joke!

Answer 9

does sh consume the oatmeal............................??? like mine??? a college teach gadgets his classification a job they might desire to write down a quick tale employing as few words as achievable it has to contain 3 subjects-faith sexuality and secret. that's the winners tale stable god - im pregnant!!! i ask your self whose it relatively is??

Answer 10

hahahahahahahaha

Very Funny

hahahahahahaha