This is my 1st x-mas w/o Goldie who I had 4 15 yrs! I miss her so much & have her ashes in my house & her collar in my room next to my pillow. I also have a new 5 mo old pup that I rescued 3 months ago. I want to be happy 4 the pup but I don't know how to get through this holiday season cause my step-dad died in Feb the day after his b-day from cancer that he had 4 14 mo then Goldie my baby died in May of liver & splean cancer. This is the 1st x-mas w/o either 1 & I miss them both! I don't know if I should by them both something. But @ the same time I don't want 2 short change my 5 mo old pup either. I don't know what 2 do! It's like everything is hitting me all @ once & I don't know if I can handle it! My husband doesn't know how I feel cause WE don't talk anymore WE might be getting a divorce! I can't have children so my pets r my children I just didn't think it would hit me this hard! I normally keep everything bottled inside & I'm trying but not sure that I can this time!! HELP!!
2006-12-06 19:36:46 · 10 answers · asked by Missy 3 in Pets ➔ Dogs
I think Goldie would be happy to see that after giving her a long and happy life, you were able to rescue a deserving pup and save a life. Dogs hold no grudges-she wouldn't feel anything other than love.
And your step dad would not want everyone to be sad and unhappy. I think you could best honor them both by giving them a gift. Buy something like blankets for the local animal shelter, or dog food. If you step-dad had a charity he liked, contact them to volunteer or make a donation in his memory. If he didn't have a charity, try the American Cancer Society.
I am sorry to hear that you may be getting a divorce-that is never easy. But I think it would be good to focus on trying to get yourself to a better state of mind and then worry about that aspect. You can only change yourself-you can't make someone else change. Enjoy the time with your new pup. Good luck.
2006-12-08 03:17:50 · answer #1 · answered by VAgirl 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi, Gadzooks get hold of your self .... That's better now list/read this and you will learn just like you will learn till the day you go to be with God, Your first obligation is to take care of the puppy give it all the love you can start training it not just for house breaking but for tricks and always let it in your lap and one other thing give some attention to you husband as well try to get him to love and help with the puppy and think of this The puppy needs 100% and for you and your husband it is and always will be 50% & 50% from both of you. Keep you mind on the things that need to be done day to day and make that puppy as much of your life and hubby too. Good Luck and May God Bless You and Yours and Have a Marry Christmas and Happy New Year.
Signed Allan C. = kb5doh
2006-12-07 04:38:36 · answer #2 · answered by a1mc@prodigy.net 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry for you're loses. I know it's hard, especially when the holidays are coming up. You have to be strong, I'm sure your step-dad would want you to be. I know your dog would. Dogs can sense when things are wrong, and I'm very sure Goldie would sense your sadness also. The wonderful things about dogs is that they can make you happy when you don't feel like it and I'm sure that Goldie wouldn't want you to be sad. You had a long time with her and I'm sure she was very happy with you, but people pass on and so do animals unfortunately. You will go on, and now you can make special memories with your new puppy. You won't forget about Goldie or your step-dad and they will live on in you're memories. I know how you must feel because I've lost dogs also. Be strong, and try to have a happy holidays!
2006-12-07 04:08:34 · answer #3 · answered by hawaiianstyler 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, it is just like losing a human to lose a pet. We've lost some old, lovable pets in the past. Perhaps making a donation to the Humane Society or Rescue Dog Foundation (?) in Goldie's name would help. Or if they have a Hospice Tree in your town, make a donation there in memory of your step-dad and Goldie.
Also, get out those pics of the dog and put them on your Christmas letter if you do one. Cry some. (I would and still do for our dog we lost 3 years ago). It gets easier, but it does take time. And keep using whatever means you have to in the coping process. Also, go to Webmd and see what they have for coping strategies for "panic attacks." I was just there and it had good info.
Bottling up doesn't help you deal with the grief. It just causes ulcers, headaches, and a general feeling of discomfort. So "let it all hang out." You'll make it, I know it in my heart.
2006-12-07 03:53:43 · answer #4 · answered by U-man 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow, sonds like me except i didn't loose a baby or my spouse. (have lost an loved relative.)
I talk about my GSD so much i think everyone is tired of hearing about him. I still have all his stuff. I even light a candle now and then that i had lit when i had him pts.
Maybe it was a bit too soon for you to get another dog. I know it was for me accepting a foster dog... (but how could i resist. I was her last hope before the needle was stuck in her at the pound. They actually called me as they were setting up the room for the morning.)
Maybe you could post her on www.dogoftheday.com in her honor and tell everyone about how wonderful she was.
If you need to, have a memorial service. Even if it is just with a couple friends.
Greiving is natural and should not be impeeded.
2006-12-07 04:00:10 · answer #5 · answered by adopt_koli 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I too have lost beloved pets and family members, so I understand ur grief. It is a normal reaction to a big loss and only time makes it easier. U really need someone to talk with about ur feelings. There r grief support groups everywhere, they now include pet loss, just look in ur phone book for info. Try to enjoy ur new puppy and lavish love on him/her, it will be returned to u tenfold. And someday u will love it as much as the one u lost, dogs have a way of warming ones heart if given a chance. Buy ur new puppy something for Xmas, its here with u and carry the deceased ones in ur heart for they really have no need for gifts. I offer u my sympathy and hopes for a brighter new year.
2006-12-07 04:23:43 · answer #6 · answered by flamingo 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
All living things come into the world, and then go out of the world. Including you, including me.
Your love for your old Husky is a beautiful thing. It won't die, but to keep this love alive and healthy you need to pass it on to your new puppy. This is painful, but it's the way life has always been, and it works. It's called grieving.
PS: 16 is a very good age for a husky: you must have looked after her very well!
2006-12-07 04:01:27 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you are having a hard time with the loss of your long time pet and your step dad. I'm glad you have another dog and hope you spend plenty of time enjoying him. If you and your husband aren't talking, you need to find others to talk with - friends or family. Just take one step at a time and do the best you can do and be gentle and loving with yourself. You need it.
2006-12-07 03:47:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
LIFE CAN BE TOUGH BUT U CAN BE TOUGHER
it is said that if u lode a pet its like losing a memeber of ur family i have answered ur other question and i find it hard to accept that too many living things have died...but dont worry i know u miss them both but u can always trust in God and remember to pray and take care of ur new pet! MERRY X-MAS
2006-12-07 04:10:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
it must be very tough to deal with this grief at a time like christmas but be strong for your new dog and other loved ones. Give yourslf time to grieve - i hope things seem better for you in 2007
2006-12-07 03:45:32 · answer #10 · answered by ...n... 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋