there is this guy in some of my classes that i am friends with...
and i like him...
but this is where i am really confused.
because when i imagine him as my boyfriend or something, i feel weird. or when i imagine kissing him. it just isn't right.
but then i thought maybe i like him as a friend, but we are friends already, and i think about him a lot.
what is this feeling?
i don't get it...
2006-12-06 14:28:33 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Honestly, it sounds like part of you is judging how fun a kisser or how exciting a dating person he would be by his looks or his confidence.
Yeah, you might have guessed it, I'm one of those guys who has been on the other side of things (IE fun but not stereotypically attractive looking to most) through my teenage years throughout college and now I'm 26.
Early on I've had some close friends who were girls mock me in front of their friends as "not the type". Then, often months later, after my saying "hey let's kiss for the heck of it...if you don't like it I won't hold you up for it or even mention it to anyone we can just go back to friends" kiss me (awkward way to do it, I know).
And afterwards they would often do a 180 and treat me well in front of their friends and then, with my being more confident, I've gotten those friends' respect as well.
And then I got the clue and started doing more exciting outdoorsy dates after getting them to do those "first kisses", let's just say it was more like something I'd do if I were already their boyfriend, far from plain movies or mini-golf.
Later on I've had girls try and get to know me as their smart-help-me-out friend but, but, knowing very well I had more to offer, I did the exciting dates at the start with making flirty fun of each other from early on. So that way I avoided the "just friendship" feeling and their friends respected me from the first day I met them.
And, honestly, I've met what most guys would call great looking extroverted hyper confident girls who were terrible kissers and made terrible impressions in front of my friends.
I've also met what most would consider so-so looking nervous shy girls who were actually much better kissers and much more expressive and cool with my friends. They just needed someone to make them comfortable enough to be that way (actually I'm with one right now: my current girlfriend).
If this guy is a genuinely fun person (and I am guessing he must be if he's got your attention without your saying he's cute at all) chances are once he gets comfortable with you he'll be fun at all the boyfriend-ish "stuff" as well (and good at it).
So I'd say give the relationship a try for at least a month or so and he'll most likely show his true colors and you two will have a blast together.
And if it doesn't work out, just be honest and say he's one of the coolest guys you know and, it's frustrating to see, but he's not exciting in the ways you want for a boyfriend. He may be frustrated he can't be with you but he likely won't get angry or break up the friendship because he'll know you respect him as a person.
Good luck...
2006-12-06 15:12:38 · answer #1 · answered by M S 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IF YOUR FRIENDS WITH OTHER GUYS JUST EITHER PICK HIM OR JUST MOVE ON UNTIL YOU GET TO KNOW HIM ALOT BETTER. AM I GOOD OR AM I GOOD AT ANSWERING AND HEC IM ONLY 10!
2006-12-06 22:33:33 · answer #2 · answered by Matt A 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u like him but you refuse to accept it
2006-12-06 22:33:01 · answer #3 · answered by Joho 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk it out with him.
2006-12-06 22:32:45 · answer #4 · answered by Mattman 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get a life!
2006-12-06 22:30:42 · answer #5 · answered by armond425 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋