ok so this guy i've been seeing on&off for about 5 months all of a sudden said "I think we need a break." It was right after the Thanksgiving weekend, and yes, we didn't get to see each other that much, and it was a bit awkward since we thought we'd be spending the entire weekend together basically but then things just got in the way, but I didn't think it was something worth "taking a break" over. Anyway, he promised to keep in touch, because he said he didn't want to lose me. He never called for the week. I called him last Friday; first he ignored my call, then he picked up and sounded all pissed off that he had to actually talk to me, and he just said "Listen, I just dont know, ok? I dont know whats going on with me, i'll sit down with u tho if you want to talk about it" so we were going to meet on saturday but it never worked out, and i havent talked to him since. Im still in love with him... what do i do? Call him? Ignore him? Wait till he calls back? What if he never does?..
2006-12-06 13:51:45 · 17 answers · asked by shaashaa621 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Wait, ok, I hear you guys, but I mean, I originally dumped HIM first because he was my first boyfriend and I just got scared of the idea of commitment. And he's done the whole romance thing -- just two weeks ago he was writing me huge letters of how much he loved me and wanted to effin' MARRY me (whoaaa) and he would make me candle-lit dinners and the whole she-bang, it was amazing, he even came to visit me at college and everything (he lives about an hour away from my college). I just dont know what's going on, and I really want to call him and just ask, "is there any chance or anything?" but everyone is telling me not to...
2006-12-06 14:05:10 · update #1
If he doesn't know, he either doesn't know, or just doesn't feel comfortable telling you. If out of the blue he breaks up with you, something other than what you know is going down and he either felt he couldn't support a relationship and what he's dealing with, or he didn't want to hurt you by it.
Try letting him know you're there for him, if he keeps denying nothing is going on, don't pester about it, don't make it seem you're interrigating him, just let him know if you need a friend you'll be there. Every once in a while check how he's doing, don't consistantly call him, if he's in an upset mood at the time you call, offer to talk about it there on the phone, not at a later date where things can get broken off.
2006-12-06 13:55:33 · answer #1 · answered by Krissy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First you need to realize that he may need space. Space can be a really hard thing to give some1 especially when you don't know what is going on. If I were you I'd leave him alone, why don't you hang out with some of your girlfriends or do something your interested in. Give him time, if you really want him back calling him is not a good idea because right now you don't know what's going on with him but you want to "fix" it. So when you call him he hears the desperation in your voice, and that will just push him further away. Get out there and meet people have fun and enjoy life. IF you do get back together you need to really talk to him to find out why he's on and off with you so often. If it will continue to happen then you don't need the stress and aggravation and should seriously decide if YOU really want to be with him!
2006-12-06 14:04:24 · answer #2 · answered by moks 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get busy doing something else honey. If he senses that you're desperate for his love, then he's going to play it for all it's worth. Once you act like his decision is ok with you, he'll do one of two things: either go on his merry way or come crawling back begging. Either way, you need to base your happiness on what you do for yourself, and then he (or new guys) will appreciate that you don't need him for anything. Relationships work out better when one person isn't dependent on another.
Anyway, join a ymca program or start volunteering or get involved w/your religion if you have one. That way, you'll either get over him easier, or you'll make him see you're not waiting around for him. Guys say that they want a girl running after them, but they will respect you better if you don't. And, under no circumstances should you call him. That makes him think that he can come back whenever he feels like, 2 weeks or 2 years later.... Hope this helps hun!!!
2006-12-06 14:00:59 · answer #3 · answered by HeavenlyBoheme 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
okay ive been in this situation before. It sounds like he doesn't know what he wants and he doesn't care if he hurts you while he is trying to figure it out. It seems like he doens't want to be with you. The best thing for you to do is to not call him at all and dont answer his call right away if he does call. Go out with some friends and if you dont have any friends just go to the mall or the library keep yourself busy. Dont ever wait around for a man because its not fair to you. If he never calls then he was a jerk and you didn't need him in your life. I hope you find the love of your life with who ever it may be . But this guy just seems a little wishy washy. good luck.
2006-12-06 13:58:12 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a really tricky situation. Allot of time guys just want some time and space, maybe he was feeling trapped, I dont know all the details, but I think that you should sort of put it on the back burner. If he calls then he calls, but if not then it wasnt meant to be. I know it might hurt, but trust me no matter how bad the pain is now it will fade with time. I know that when my ex and i broke up it was one of the hardest things i have ever had to do. and i have never felt so much pain, but i was able to move on and i think that you can too.
2006-12-06 13:59:02 · answer #5 · answered by Papa V 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It bothers me to have to say this, but from one woman to another, and to take the title of the book, he's just not that into you.
(book by Greg Behrendt). Its a soft book, an ez bathroom read.
But, he really does hit the nail on the head. YOU are into him. HE is not THAT into you. He likes you. But he isnt THAT into you. Simply put. Don't try to squeeze something out of this man. Just go on. You really want someone who is as passionate about you as you are them.
Really, I'm 43. He isnt into you. If he was, it would be flowers, candy and love poems. (or whatever his personal equivalent is).
Don't try to get him to talk to you, walk away. You can be sad. But, stay in purportion, it isnt a long term romance. It was what it was, have a few sweet memories, but don't choke the whole thing to death and leave it like a bug gasping for air after being stepped on by a little boy in the 1st grade.
It doesnt mean you aren't great, it simply means, he's just not that into you. There are men who have adored you, and you were ahhh Im just not THAT into him..... Its just the other side now. Go in peace, wash your hair, and smile.
2006-12-06 13:59:33 · answer #6 · answered by batwanda 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like that guy is either going through something or he just wants to end it with you. Third option would be that he loves you so much that he doesn't know what to do but to stay away from you to prevent hurting you. You'll have to decide which it is and find out from him and just try to get him to talk to you no matter how hard that is. Other people's opinions aren't as good as the ones thtat he gives you, especially if we don't know how HE feels....Good Luck~!
2006-12-06 13:55:41 · answer #7 · answered by Angel in Practice 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
properly, i'm 50 years old and on my own. My coronary heart continues to be broken over the final failed relationship. I desire i ought to grant some sturdy suggestion or desire yet I lost all desire 2 years in the past while my relationship ended and the guy had lied to me and alter into truly married. In our worldwide as we communicate, you certainly need to run a sturdy lower back floor examine to confirm if the different guy or woman is married or what the real certainty is. sooner or later in case you land up in yet another relationship, i could run a history examine as a lot of human beings lie and that they don't seem to be what they seem in any respect. I desire you the superb. sturdy success!
2016-12-18 08:56:18 · answer #8 · answered by nurdin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off I would like to know the age of this guy (doesnt really matter, but older men shouldnt be this stupid). I think basically he wants to be single or has someone else. Men are cowards & have very short attention spans & if it doesnt involve intimacy, they flock to the next & easiest person. I would be the mature adult & walk away.. forget about him, there are other better guys who dont cheat & will treat you like the princess, you are. My boyfriend agrees, he says that he was either cheating on his thanksgiving break or has someone he works with or is close to, that he wants to hook up with. thats our opinion, but Good luck ..
2006-12-06 14:03:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well just wait untill he call's you and if he dosen't then you'll know it's over between you two and you should move on with your life and fine someone else that loves you and will alway's be there for you ok but if he dose call you then you know he really cares for you then you can go from there with the relationship.
2006-12-06 14:04:37 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋