What should I do?

Question

I'm very unattractive, I never used to care - its what inside that counts right? But I've started being extreamly insecure about the way I look. and to add to that; Im pretty ditzy and a really full on person (im very passionate about certain political agendas). Ive been single most of this year and im starting to worry that im going to die with no one to be by my side and comfort me. My mum is in her 50's now and she's been single for nearly 15 yrs. Ive was 'involved' with someone a couple of times last week, but really dont like him-he's the opposite of what im attracted to. All I really want is a companion and someone that looks in my eyes and cares for me (and smells good!). should i wait or just take what ever i can get - after all, I may not get any better

Answer 1

Don't just settle for anyone, you really have to be attracted to them or have some kind of connection. If there is nothing you like about him why bother?

Answer 2

First, as a guy I have to point out that when you say you're physically unattractive, I have to wonder in what way. Different men find different things unattractive, and there ARE men who are turned on by what some might consider a horrible defect. For instance, I am repulsed by obese women - it signifies to me a lack of self-control and concern for health and lifespan. I certainly wouldn't want someone who can;t take care of herself helping me raise children. But I'm one guy. Other guys like women with some "mass" on them. God bless them.

The other thing - being passionate about certain political agendas. THAT can be a BIG turnoff. Regardless of whether you're an Ann Coulter/Michelle Malkin in opinion, or a Susan Estrich(?), if you get too weird about politics you're going to turn just about everyone away from you. And besides that, what's the point? Its okay to have opinions but when you get consumed by them and can't let a conversation occur without inject some kind of "political point," you quite frankly become a boore.

I can't speak for your strengths, but speaking from a man's point of view, respectable men generally find confident, intelligent women more attractive. Jackasses and abusers look for insecure "ditzes." Try to improve upon your assets and not worry about the things you can't change.

And put yourself in situations where you can meet men with whom you'll share similar interests. I know everyone says that, but apart from going back to college and hoping to find an older man there you are left with volunteer organizations or clubs. I'd say go to a group with whose politics you agree, but if you get all wrapped up in the debates you won't be able to connect to anyone. Thats just the way it is.

Answer 3

1) Looks aren't everything, it's what's inside that counts???
- True to a point... Ones package is pretty darn important though... but it is all relative..
2) Not everyone is a 10 ya know.. there is someone (probably several) out there for you... just be realistic about your expectations..
- If you are a 3, don't expect to hook up with a 10, period. If you do, watch out that you are not being used for one thing or another.
- don't despair and good luck, nice goes a long way.

Answer 4

Clear yourself up and find out who you are. You must love yourself before someone else will. Wait for the right man to come into your life. There are a lot of ways to meet a man, Take out an ad in the paper, go on line and put a profile in good luck

Answer 5

hey sounds like your bumbed about how you look, we all do that at one time of our life. but when i do i normally go get a facial and
think of a different and new and fun and cute hairstyle and i go do it at a salon. get a massage maybe a manicure. and if you don't have the money just be your self and try new up-dews with your hair. put pins on your backpack and make you binder cool.
Try new mix-matches with you clothes. trust me you will feel much better about yourself after you do this.

Answer 6

if that ain't the worst case of self esteem i have ever heard well the first thing you do is hit me up and let me give you a second opinion

Answer 7

it takes time, but you will find someone. You don't sound unatractive, you sound very smart// so dont think that your looks has anything to do with it.

Answer 8

its better to die alone then to go for anyone