why would a mother pick one daughter over the other?

Question

Just say this: Okay my birthday is today and no calls, no nothing from my mom and all my sisters (except one-told me happy b-day) and brother.
This truely hurts my feelings. I know i am 27 now but it hurts to know that when it is all my other sibling's birthdays our mom buys them something or takes them out to eat or whatever but me NOTHING.

What would you all do about this? I am sick of being done this way. It is like i am not even part of the family and i don't understand cause i am no different than the rest of them.

Thanks

My siblings ages are 33,30, (27-me), 25, 21, 17 & 11-(brother)

I have a 5 year old son that she could care less about as well..she favors my other sisters kids than mine like something is wrong with my son when there is not

Answer 1

i know how u feel, until all my sibling stopped talkin to my mother, i was the one she always forgot about. the one she never seemed to quit care about like the others. i did everything right and to this day i know she only calls me bc they arent talkin to her. makes me sad. they didnt do anything like i did with their lives and yet she seemed to care more for them. just stop callin her show her that she is missin out ..u r special I am tellin u that from my heart. u r. just put them on the back burner for awhile til they can treat u like u deserve. I wish u dient feel hurt.

Answer 2

Have you talked to your mother about this? How old is she? Do you live around her? Speaking for myself, I have 2 boys and 2 girls. I try not to favor any of them, but different kids, have different needs. I try to help the ones who need it most, but with four of them, it is hard. One needs special needs, because he is in a wheel chair. He is married with 2 kids, and they try to help him. He has no need for money as my husband left him well off in the money department, and he ask for almost nothing. The second girl is a truck driver and i rarely see her. She calls when she thinks about it, but she works 36 hours straight, so the calls aren't very often. I have one boy, i am afraid to say is an addict and i keep him at arms length, until he shows me he is trying to straighten up. One daughter lives with me, cause she is afraid she is going to loose me too. She smothers me since her dad died. Life hurt's and if you don't try to do something about it, it will eat you alive. You need to find out what the problem is and then try to fix it. I am not a jesus freak, but a prayer now and then is not going to hurt you. The bible says, if you don't ask, you won't recieve. Also check out the wicca sights. It is a littl different kind of religion, but all of it works thru the big man. You are exactly where you are suppose to be at this moment. It also could be a test for you. God does answer, just sometimes you think he's not there, and bam! He gives you the answer when you least expect it. Also make sure your mom doesn't have trouble with her memory. I cannot believe a mother goes out of her way to hurt her children. And too, you have to look at yourself and make sure your fears are really fears and nota pitty party. If you need to talk with someone, I am a good listener and i do not charge for helping people. I just like to solve problems. I am a nurse.Think about what i have said and you can reach me at [e-mail]. God Bless and Blessed Be.

Answer 3

First thing ..you should talk to your family one at a time and tell them how you are feeling. They will care and i am sure they will be sad to know you feel left out. It could just be a simple misunderstanding. You never know until you communicate with them. Also, perhaps they may feel you gave them a 'vibe' or something that you did not like to celebrate your birthday or something like that. Just be rational and have a nice relaxing conversation with everyone. Things will work out just fine :) Good luck!

Answer 4

Happy birthday
Im sorry that happened to you

first off maybe your family is busy?
second not to be rude, but its just a birthday, i mean im 15 and i dont really care about my birthdays anymore i have even forgotten how old i am

I would wait till the day after to see if anyone calls later on today and if no one calls i would just call them and ask them if they knew what today is.
sorry if this wasnt much help

Answer 5

well happy birthday to you..my mom was like this..she actually came out nd said my youngest sister was and would be her favorite because she was the baby..needless to say this did cause a bit of strain between my mom..wasn't as close to her as i could have been,when i did go over i never stayed longbut i had and still have a great relationship with my sister....i basically went with the flow and didn't let it bother me too much..i do feel my mom got the ultimate revenge on me for not being her favorite,she died on my daughters 2nd birthday almost 3 years ago

Answer 6

She's a bytch of the highest order. Maybe she has grandkids from your other siblings, because they will be her only friends. She's evil stay away and be happy......yes and say FU! Truely, why do you waste your time thinking about ppl like that, obviously she's not thinking about you. Your feelings ARE truely hurt, how many more times are you going to let her hurt you? The choice is yours. When the time comes, stick her in a nursing home, don't visit and don't go to her funeral.

Answer 7

Unfortunately your mother is just human. Just because she is your mother doesnt mean she has super powers or super vision to see you are hurting. Its not right for your mother to ignore you which is why you need to talk to your mother about it, tell her how you're feeling and what you want out of your relationship with you.
My mother always favoured my sister over me, she knew it then and knows it till today but since Ive opened up to her more and spoken to her about her behaviour our relationship is changing for the better.
Its a gradual thing, it wont happen overnight unfortunately but its better happening then for nothing to happen at all.
And lastly if it is your bday today - HAPPY BDAY :)
Just remember the key to any relationship be it your family or lover... COMMUNICATION is the key.

Answer 8

Dont look at it like that. Sometimes a Mom gives each kid what each kid needs. I bet if you took a minute and thought real hard you could come up with a few things your Mom did for you that she didn't do for any of the others.

I understand how you feel about your birthday...HAPPY BIRTHDAY! But sometimes things aren't what they seem. If it really bothers you...ask your Mom....nicely. :) You might be surprised by her answer.

Answer 9

This is hard. Talk to each of them individually. Explain how you feel and see if anything changes or if they can offer an explanation for their own behavior. Ask each one only about their own attitudes, don't ask them to speak for another family member.
If any of them cannot treat you with the respect you deserve, you need to create some distance to protect yourself. And find other people to fill your life with positive feedback and love.
I'm sorry for your situation and wish you a Happy Birthday.

Answer 10

Some mothers are like this. Its probably because of her mother. Your granny might of liked the other more than your mom. So instead of being the opposite of your granny, she chose to make you feel the pain as she did. Sit down and have a talk with her. Thats my advice.