Protestants: What is your interpretation of Matthew 19:3-9 that makes divorce OK?

Question

I'm having trouble coming up with a reading of this passage in which getting a divorce was not a sin. Particularly where Jesus says "I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery" (Mat 19:9 KJV). Is there another way of looking at this line? Maybe an alternate translation where it says something different? Or do you believe that infidelity really is the only valid reason for divorce, and anyone who divorces because of "irreconcilable differences" or because "it just wasn't working out" is violating a commandment?

A couple people have mentioned other Biblical passages which say other things about divorce. This has nothing to do with my question. I am asking about what Jesus said at Matthew 19:9. He doesn't say "I tell you ... commits adultery, but refer to the Book of Malachi for other cases where divorce is okay." He says except for marital infidelity, no divorce is valid. So either Jesus is lying, or getting divorced because of spousal abuse is a sin. I'm pretty sure spousal abuse is also a sin, but that doesn't mean it's grounds for divorce. At least not if you take Jesus' word for it.

Answer 1

Can't answer. Not a Protestant. But it's a heck of a good question!!!

Answer 2

Dude: The Bible means what it says and it says what it means. God hates divorce. The only reason that Moses allowed it is that the Jews had unforgiving hearts and would not forgive adultery even if repentance was present. You may read all the different Bible versions out there and the answer will be the same.
In today's society there is the issue of unrepentant by an adulterous spouse who continues to have sex with anyone who will have him as well as continuous spousal abuse. These can be and sometimes are valid causes for divorce. The key factor is "repentance." If the offending spouse has an unrepentant attitude, then divorce must occur.
Mr. M on "Matt. 19:3-9."

Answer 3

God, the Originator of marriage, designed it to be a permanent union. But is there any Scriptural reason for a person to divorce his or her mate, and one that would allow for the possibility of remarrying? Jesus addressed this matter by declaring: “I say to you that whoever divorces his wife, except on the ground of fornication, and marries another commits adultery.” (Matthew 19:9) Sexual infidelity by a mate is the only ground for a divorce that will allow the innocent mate to remarry, or the death of the husband or the wife..

In addition, the Bible’s words at 1 Corinthians 7:10-16, while encouraging marriage mates to stay together, allow for separation. Some, after trying very hard to preserve their marriage, feel they have no choice but to separate. What can be acceptable Scriptural grounds for such a step?

One is willful nonsupport. When getting married, a husband assumes the responsibility of providing for his wife and children. The man who willfully fails to provide the material necessities of life “has disowned the faith and is worse than a person without faith.” (1 Timothy 5:8) So separation is possible.

Another is extreme physical abuse. So then, if a mate physically abuses his wife, the victim may separate. (Galatians 5:19-21; Titus 1:7) “Anyone loving violence [God’s] soul certainly hates.” Psalm 11:5.

Another ground for separation is the absolute endangerment of a believer’s spirituality, one’s relationship with God. When a mate’s opposition, perhaps including physical restraint, has made it impossible to pursue true worship and has imperiled the believer’s spirituality, then some believers have found it necessary to separate. Matthew 22:37; Acts 5:27-32.

However, if divorce is pursued under such circumstances, one would not be free to enter a new marriage. According to the Bible, the only legitimate ground for divorce that permits remarriage is adultery or “fornication.” Matthew 5:32.

The Bible allows only one reason for getting a divorce that frees a person to remarry, and that is fornication (Greek, porneia, gross sexual immorality). If fornication is committed, then the innocent mate may decide whether to get a divorce or not. Matthew 5:32.

After telling the Pharisees that the Mosaic concession of divorcing their wives was not the arrangement that had prevailed “from the beginning,” Jesus said: “I say to you that whoever divorces his wife, except on the ground of fornication, and marries another commits adultery.” (Mt 19:8, 9)


Marriage involves two people with differing personalities learning to develop common interests and working together toward common goals. Marriage is a lifelong commitment, not a casual agreement that can be lightly abandoned. In many countries, divorce is not difficult to obtain, but in the eyes of a Christian, the marriage relationship is sacred. It is ended only for a very serious reason. (Matt. 19:9) Christian spouses can avail themselves of wise counsel from the Bible, support from fellow Christians, and a close, prayerful relationship with God. A successful marriage endures, and over the years, it brings happiness and contentment to husband and wife. More important, it brings honor to God, the Originator of marriage

Answer 4

You are right, infidelity is the only reason. The problem is that people really were made to be married and most are not happy single. But apart from that divorce is wrong.

Answer 5

Marriage was never "eternal". We sometimes think it was designed to never end but every marriage ends. The Bible has 3 reasons that allow for divorce. The one you mentioned of sexual immorality allows the innocent party to divorce "if they choose" because the immorality has all ready split them spiritually for when one is intimate with another "they 2 shall become one". So the immoral one had joined them self to another.
2. It also allows for divorce if one party is a non believer and refuses to stay with the believer. This is for the sake of peace in the church and home.
3. Death brings divorce to all marriages and releases those still living to marry again.
However for those who think divorce is no big deal even in reason 1 and 2 remember that God hates divorce.

Answer 6

I am not aware that anyone thinks that Jesus words mean anything except what they mean except maybe the Jehovah's Witnesses.

May GOD richly bless you.

Answer 7

When in doubt, grab the Word. Divorce is not good.

Answer 8

Nope Fundamentlists love to obsfuscate this with how much god hates homosexuality though...

Answer 9

arnt you guys above the law?

so if your above the law of the OT your above Jesus law too, unless you say the "son" is greater than the "father"

Answer 10

In a civil society, we don't base our marriage law on the bible.