Regarding family...?

Question

I have to make the decision to be happy or continue to have contact with my family. Whenever Im around them I can feel this thick fog start to weigh down and I feel like ****. When I start to spend time away from them at first i feel alone but then I start to finally feel free to live. I know this sounds dramatic in a sense but I really want to live my life the way I have always dreamed and this would mean not seeing my family much for probably years. I feel like I need so much room. I dont want to hurt them but they already have so many problems of their own. I have nothing left to give them. I am drained. I want to break my thought pattern on this whole situation and finally learn to love myself and not have this empty feeling. How do I do this?

Answer 1

I know the feeling well.My life was never mine because I spent it trying to do all the right things and pleasing them. Nothing seemed to work.
A person can get really pulled down with family members.
I moved away a few years ago and love it. I'm doing things I want to without a family member always looking to see what I'm doing.I'm still in contact and see them once in awhile and that's fine by me.
Move away.Break the ties for awhile. Be and do what you want. After all, you only have one life and it is yours not everyone else's.

Answer 2

If you're old enough to be on your own and can support yourself, then I would do what makes you feel best. Don't leave on bad terms, because things change all the time, and if the family situation got better and you'd left on bad terms, you'd have a hard time going back. If confronting them face to face is too hard, write a letter, and let them know you'll be in touch from time to time to let them know how you're doing. Good luck and God Bless

Answer 3

Don't see them... but in order to make you feel less guilty let them know that you have to take time out for yourself and that you will not see them for a while. Just disappearing will leave you feel guilty. If you tell them they might just be mad for a while, but over time they will let that go and at least they know what is going on. You don't have to give explainations. Remember that what you do is for your good. If you are not happy around them then there really is only one thing to do.

Answer 4

you are not saying how old you are and that makes a difference. if you are of age to go out and make your own life (meaning at least 18 to 21) I say go for it. move out of the home, get a job and try it on your own. sometimes, absence makes the heart grow fonder on both sides. don't say you don't want to see them for years, this is foolish; but, if you move away, and get started on your own life, you'll proably realize you miss them to a certain extent. pain, which you must have gone through with them, brings this feeling on - your leaving the nest, will make you forget this and, also, make you start thinking of them in other ways - you'll start to forget the anger and realize you still want them in your life -- but, it will be on your terms. don't give up on family - but, also, don't give up on your own life. i guess i'm trying to tell you - that no family is close to perfect - and we all need some space from them from time to time - but somehow we realize that they are what they are and, if we accept them for what we know they are and get on with our own life - it all works out. -- i hope you find your world in this way. good luck.

Answer 5

Honey, if you can support yourself economically, then go ahead
leave and be happy, but don't leave in bad terms, tell your family you are leaving and the reasons for this. You'll see everything will be much better. After the storm- comes calmness.

Answer 6

I think you should do what's best for you. I know it's hard, but some families are just toooo dysfunctional. If being with your family causes you so much unhappiness, let them go.