We were in the kitchen making dinner, talking about her day at school, when I noticed a trickle of blood running down her leg. I pretended that I didn't notice, and right before I was about to make an excuse to get something from the garage, she looked down in horror. Before I could say anything she ran crying to her room and locked the door behind her. I asked if she was OK and she yelled, "Go away!"
I'm so confused.
[frown]
2006-12-06 10:32:19 · 59 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Yes, I am a single father. Her mother is deceased.
2006-12-06 10:38:59 · update #1
Update: She's stilll locked in her room. I called her on her cell phone but she wont answer. I went to the store and bought her some maxi pads and condoms, put them in a box and wrapped it up in gift paper. I also got her some roses. I'll leave all these outside her door.
2006-12-06 11:53:42 · update #2
You should have educated her BEFORE this happened ... nevertheless ... go in and talk to her, get to the store to buy her pads. Make sure she understands that EVERY woman goes through this and go from there.
2006-12-06 10:34:40 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
Are you the dad? I sure hope you're the dad and not the mom. Any decent parent wouldn't ignore this!!! It's a HUUUUUUGE deal to any and every girl! She now could've been damaged from this, but hopefully not. You need to be as gentle and loving and understanding as possible. If you're the dad, pretend you're dealing with your wife while in labor and be gentle and sweet and caring but not prying or too touchy or overbearing. (I know, women are hard). Offer to run to the store for her to buy her sanitary napkins and tampons. Try different kinds. Get several for her to try. She'll need to use the pads first because it'll take her a little while to figure out the tampon stuff.
Then after she's showered and changed and whatever offer to buy a take-home dinner or ask her what her favorite thing is, unless you already know, and go get it (treat and movie) and then have a relaxing evening (like you're on a date) and don't talk about it again. Ask if she's feeling alright, offer her some medicine, and say you're sorry she was embarressed and you promise you won't tell anybody about it.
She needs reassurance, protection, plenty of supplies and comforts right now.
GOOD LUCK!
2006-12-06 10:36:55 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
You should have had the birds & bees talk with her at least 3 years ago so she would have been prepared for it.
I had my talk when I was 8 years old, my mother got a stash of pads for me and I kept them in my bottom dresser drawer, I couldn't wait for it to start, I looked at that box o'pads for 3 years waiting for it.
I wasn't traumatized, I wasn't nervous, or anything. The day it started I grabbed a pad and carried on life. Told my mother, "oh, I started today".
That should have been demystified long before now Dad. It didn't have to be like this. Now she's really gonna have a complex over it for a while. Young women are really sensitive about males and how much they know about the female body.
If you cannot explain it to her, about her menstrual cycle then the next closest female relative should and if there are none available, then call a nurse (hospitals have nurses you know).
What you've got to do now, is this weekend, you've got to make some kinda ceremonious "girl into a woman day" for her. Whether you like it or not, she's gotta know that she's not to be ashamed of the changes taking place in her body. You tell her it's normal, it's part of life, that all men know about it and it's not a big deal, in a few years she'll be all grown up and that you're going to make it up to her this weekend.
What you do on the weekend...
1. You take her to get her hair done,
2. You take her to get her pedicure
3. You take her to buy a nice new outfit
and if you can afford it.
4. Take her to dinner.
Tell her she's growing up into a woman, and she has to conduct herself like a young adult now that she has the reproductive capacity to make another human life. Tell her that's all that her period is about. Nothing secretive or unnatural or something to be ashamed of.
Good luck Dad.
2006-12-06 10:51:01 · answer #3 · answered by alwaysbombed 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ok dad, well your little girl just turned into a woman. She needs to clean up. Knock on her door again. Tell her you want to talk. Keep this up until she finally lets you in. The two of you need to go to the pharmacy together and buy some pads (NOT TAMPONS, it's not good for girls to use tampons until after they've had they're period for the first year). On the way there you need to explain what's happened to her body. You need to try to explain what's happing and if she needs clarification (which I'm sure she will(it's a little hard to understand the first time you hear it or even the 2nd or 3rd)) then tell her this website Coolnurse.com can really help her understand. Oh and she'll need to put toilet paper there until she gets pads so it doesn't leak again. I'd suggest Always Ultra Thin Pads(the pads are wrapped in Pink) If her period is regular or light. It's easy for young and petite people to use. Otherwise try Always Utra. Always is a great brand and they feel like underwear too. How old is she?
Good Luck. And if you need anymore advice concerning her on this subject or otherwise e_mail me.
2006-12-06 10:47:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
She is just confused. I started mine a while ago and it made me feel really weird and uncomfortable....and truthfully gross. Just try and help her, but for a while don't bring it up. if she has a real heavy flow, that she sould probly use bigger pads(to prevent that from happening again) or a tampon and a pad. Eventually she will get used to it and it will seem like nothing tell her this. Never mention her period in front of anyone. Its something that should b only between a girl and her mother or a girl and her best friends. Just comfort her, but don't bring it up that much. Maybe bring her to get some icecream, to make her feel better. Thats what my mom did. Good luck!
2006-12-06 10:47:17 · answer #5 · answered by puffalump 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call a woman that you trust - NOW. She will go to the store and buy the correct products for a young girl. Then she needs to sit down and talk to her / get her cleaned up and explain how to use the products. THEN after the termoil has settled down, YOU sit down and talk to her - like a 'daddy' not a father. Tell her that it is perfectly normal and that you will be there for her no matter what happens. She is just embarrased right now, give her time. BUT call that woman friend/relative RIGHT NOW. If there is not anyone, you will need to go to the store and buy the pads and Tylenol.
2006-12-06 10:43:27 · answer #6 · answered by GP 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From the way you reacted I can assume that there isn't a mother around that she can talk to... sorry if I'm wrong... if there isn't a female around the home that she could talk to maybe just try explaining to her that this is normal that it happens to all girls in their lives... go to the store and get her some pads... nothing to big and bulky if you need help ask a female employee... if there is a female nurse at her school or any female teacher for that matter ask them to talk to her... it's going to take a while for her to understand and adjust to the fact that this is going to happen every month for the majority of her life but she'll understand eventually... good luck
2006-12-06 10:41:03 · answer #7 · answered by Wiked 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You pretended that you didn't notice!!!!!!????!!!!
No wonder she's scared.
For starters, it would probably be better if her mother spoke with her.
However. if she isn't around, the last thing she needs is a guy who pretended not to notice. She needs sensitivity. If she understands what is happening then give her some space right now. Hopefully, you will have some pads or something to help with the mess from the blood. But other then that, let her be and either have a compassionate woman talk with her or just listen.
2006-12-06 10:37:40 · answer #8 · answered by ontheroadagainwithoutyou 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should have prepared her for this before it actually happened but now that it already has I would sit outside and talk to her through her door non stop until she lets you in. Tell her about when yours started. What it means. How grown up she's becoming. Anything you can think of. Go on line to
beingagirl.com. They have awesome stuff for the pre to young teen crowd. Including some free samples.
If she won't listen to you, see if you can get some info from WebMd for her to read over.
Make sure she understands the importance of keeping clean now please.
Good Luck!
2006-12-06 10:37:02 · answer #9 · answered by sixcannonballs 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, if you haven't had the "facts of life" talk, now's the time to do it. Make it very matter of fact, this is no big deal, it's just a part of life.
Go the the store and get her some maxipads. And check out the library for books.
If you have a trusted female friend or relative, enlist her help.
Many girls, who are not given the information in advance, think they are dying. You'd don't want to scare the poor girl.
2006-12-06 10:42:52 · answer #10 · answered by chieromancer 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I have 4 month old twin girls and a 5 year old son. What my mom did was we sat down and had a heart to heart we went to t he store at got, pads, pantiliners and tampons. She gave me a book too, and at the age of 14 I was pretty well educated on the subject. Has she seen the 'video' or had 'the talk' yet? I was nervous before seeing those things but after I understood that it was a part of life, I'll probably be telling this to Emma and Madison when they are at that age.
♥ The Campbells: Olivia, Blaine, James, Emma and Madison
2006-12-06 10:36:48 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋