I met this hot guy from Spain last summer. I'm crazy about him still and we are meeting this Christmas. He told me he loved me, but then stated he was suprised he fell in love with me because I wasn't as "hot" and thin as he prefers his girlfriends to be. And then he said that he didn't want to be with me anymore once he was leaving. As a result, I've lost a lot of weight, dress better, and have a better overall physical appearance. Was I stupid for doing this? I really like this guy a lot and I think he will be suprised to see how i've improved....
2006-12-06 07:52:12 · 19 answers · asked by Manny P 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You are not a loser...Many women experience this and go through it...you are human.
He might of been the main reason why you started losing your weight and all,but I;m sure somewhere along the way, you started doing it for yourself at the same time, as you started to feel better about yourself,so you can in away think of it as he was your motivator but you are the one that conqured it.
I understand you like this guy alot and sure he will be surprised on your hard work...but...if he could not appreciate you then,he does not deserve you now.
If he actually fell in love with you before he left,he would of held onto you knowing what he had.It might of been his "easy"way of getting out as it would of, at the time, sound resonable.
I say still meet him and let him see the new you and flaunt it,but don't let him have it.If he could not see past the outside of you to know you in the most important ways he sure is not going to see it this time as he will only see the outside now.Do you actually want a man who perfers skinny over personality.
Just because you improved the outside you are still the same you on the inside.
Keep it for someone that knows what the most important things are. Someone that will respect you and wants to know you for you on the inside and doesn't care what is on the outside, cause when a man thinks you are beautiful on the inside he automatically thinks the outside is just as beautiful.
2006-12-06 08:36:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He so does not deserve you. You said you are meeting this Christmas, but then he didn't want to be with you anymore once he was leaving.???? I don't understand, but anyway, get over him. I was married to a guy for years and he left me for another woman because I had gained a little weight after the baby. The funny part, now she has a big @ss. What comes around, goes around. Look for someone that loves the inside and not what's on the outside.
2006-12-06 15:58:58 · answer #2 · answered by Becky F 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you kidding me? First of all if he loved you, he would love you for you, not for how you look, so he is lying when he said he loved you. He would never have brought that up. Second if you wanted to change your appearance thats fine, as long as you do it for you, not for some guy. Now that you say you have improved your self, go out and find a guy who will treat you will the respect you deserve. If you being skinny and if you dressing better will make him like you more, he sounds a little shallow to me. Dont get me wrong, looks are important for the initial physical attraction. But when you love somebody, you love them for who they are, not what they look like. Just remember that if you do decide to be with him again.
2006-12-06 15:58:21 · answer #3 · answered by jam_psb 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bettering yourself is a good thing but I have to say you did it for all the wrong reasons. You should want to change because you are doing it for you. I'm glad you made the improvements if it made you feel better but this guy isn't guaranteed to want you anymore because you did. And if he does it won't be because he loves you as a person, it'll be purely physical. And what happens when he says I think your nose is too big , i only date girls with tiny noses now. Would you go rush under the knife. I say it's going to lower your self-esteem sticking around this guy, he sounds shallow. You'll never be happy in a relationship unless you are truly happy with yourself and not dependent on him for your self-assurance.
2006-12-06 16:01:53 · answer #4 · answered by LoveLeighe 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes Constructive criticsm leads us to a higher plain of motivation to improve ourselves. You are not a loser. You just took the initiative to do what you always wanted....with the help of a somewhat cold comment coming from the person you are attracted to. Love is a many splendored thing. I wish you the best. I kinda resent the way he told you that he loved you..but degraded you for your appearance. Don't leave yourself open to get hurt, make sure you know the water you intend to swim in before stepping off the shore. God Bless
2006-12-06 16:01:06 · answer #5 · answered by 35 YEARS OF INTUITION 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should just let it go he's gone don't tie your self to something in the past if he couldn't appreciate you and see how wonderful you are then it's his loss but don't be the one thats going crazy over because he said those wonderful words "I love you" doesn't mean anything so let him go theres always someone out there for some one the guy you find might even be better and HOTTER!!! than this guy from spain:)
2006-12-06 15:59:04 · answer #6 · answered by Chocolates_Finest05 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The Real problem here is that this guy is a loser and you are too good for him.No decent guy is going to tell you all his other girlfriends are hotter and thinner than you.Screw him...you DESERVE better,he is not worth it!
2006-12-06 15:57:23 · answer #7 · answered by sugar_n_spice 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't wait for the guy. Just move on with your life. If he comes back and wants to start something up again, then great, but don't stand around and wait for something that might not happen.
2006-12-06 15:55:36 · answer #8 · answered by Die S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't have changed your appearance for some dumb guy. There are LOTS of skinny and pretty girls out there, you're just one of them. One day he'll get bored of you and go off to find someone else. Forget about him.
2006-12-06 16:00:15 · answer #9 · answered by ♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No way GF let him see how Hot you are and then when he begs you to take him back dump him and find a better guy instead
2006-12-06 15:54:44 · answer #10 · answered by AngelVirgo9206 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋