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My husband and I took our nephew in because his sister needed help. She has four kids, but he is screaming at me and talking back at me. He is six years old and I don't know how to discipline him anymore.

2006-12-06 05:17:45 · 11 answers · asked by dudettejj 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting Grade-Schooler

11 answers

Send him to a room (w/o tv's stereos,etc) for time-out at intervals of 15 min. each,he'll learn soon who is in control.

2006-12-06 05:22:57 · answer #1 · answered by Dylan aka Dilly 4 · 2 0

http://www.dingosgotmybaby.com/2006/07/15/behavior-modification-shamu/

try a new approach. read this article regarding behavior modification. seriously, when u've had the last straw, i really believe this could work, or at least change the dynamic in the house. remember, young kids need discipline and structure. they also try to fight those boundaries and push the limits to figure out how much "power" they have. and sometimes kids that act out are seeking Any type of attention, whether Positive or Negative. that means, if u glare, yell, hit, it is still a sort of Attention he is getting, which means he's not ignored. perhaps he feels as if no one really cares about him, and he's gotta be loud and crazy to get some kind of response. i think if u ignore the bad stuff to a certain extent, and start Positively praising ANY little thing he does right, then he will hopefully learn to get attention in Positive manner. good luck.. it seems pretty hard to implement esp when the kid is screaming, but it's worth a try. good luck~

2006-12-06 05:28:39 · answer #2 · answered by sasmallworld 6 · 0 0

It sounds like there's a rough road ahead. It seems he is acting out because he misses his mom. Don't ignore him; he probably needs the attention, because he's not sure how to adjust to what's going on right now. Try to sit down with him (in a calm and confortable environment) and ask him (and listen attentively) why he thinks he's so mad that he has to scream (if you can, do this the next time he screams or back talks; if not, then when calms down). Wheter he answers or not (he might not have one), ask him how he feels about mom. He probably just wants to share those feelings. Explain to him that whatever's going on with mom is affecting you to and that he's alone in this. If he feels mad at her, he may be afraid that he's not supposed to feel that way and may be afraid to show it. Assure him that no matter what he feels, everyone will still love him.

Then tell him how you feel about it. And if possible, mention feelings that you also feel, but be sure they are honest feelings (dishonest feelings will create a distrust between you two). Sharing similar feelings will give you a closer bond with him and he will feel more comfortable talking to you and will be more willing to listen to you and respect your opinion.

Then tell him how it makes you feel when he screams at you and dad (it would be best if your husband could be there for your conversation). It will be easier for him to accept how his actions can affect others.

Then lay down the law. Tell him sternly, yet still in a calm and loving manor, that you and dad are in charge. You should have consequences for unacceptible behavior. Make him aware of each one. Get down to the specifics, if you can to prevent misinformation. If he's unclear about a rule, he may be afraid of doing something that is actually okay and may be afraid to ask you (he might realize that that conversation was particularly important and feel that you'll get mad at him for not listening, or he might just use it as a free card -- a "plead of ignorance"). Be sure to tell him that it is okay to ask later about any rule or anything else in the conversation -- even after you ask if he has any questions.

Be sure to end the conversation with a hug. That will help confirm that you were sincere in what you said about loving him, and take some pressure of him.

2006-12-06 06:14:53 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0 0

I am sure you are going to give him all the love in the world. And the problem is understandable understanding the backgground and situation. But that is not going to solve the problem.

You need to sets some rules and impose some discipline and enforce these with punishments. Like a lot of younger parents are rediscovering, spankings work really well when done consistently. That is what I would do for your sake and his.

2006-12-06 07:45:02 · answer #4 · answered by beckychr007 6 · 0 0

Time outs really do work the key is to not engage him once he is in the timeout. Put him in a corner and make him stay there for 6 minutes. If he tries to walk away put him back in even if this goes on for an hour.The reason I say only six minutes is because it is one minute for every year they are. Thus he is six years old so six minutes. After he is finished with the timeout go over and talk to him and explain to him why he is in the timeout. Then make him apologize to you for his actions. This really does work the key is to be consistent. Good Luck to you.

2006-12-06 05:49:25 · answer #5 · answered by mary3127 5 · 0 0

you won't manage to do something related to the way he's except grandma gets it on the discipline. Sorry to declare this youngster has an fairly long and troublesome highway forward for him. All you're able to do is placed your movements the place your words are. tell him which you like him yet his habit is unacceptable and because he won't act wisely you will no longer be spending time or money with him. Now granted his parents could spend time with him besides, yet they do no longer could react to his irrelevant habit with the aid of giving him what he needs. I had to do this with my granddaughter once I have been given custody of her and it became into troublesome the two bodily and emotionally, yet she knows the thank you to act now. We had genuine uncomplicated regulations, if she threw it - it went to the trash continually and on no account to get replaced. If she tore up some thing of mine - I tore up some thing of hers. If I suggested no - I meant no - no remember how a lot whining - i could purely overlook approximately her and not respond in any respect. If we've been in public at a save or anyplace and he or she began pitching a in effective condition, one time i could tell her to quit, if she did no longer, we would leave on the instant - an excellent style of the time with me donning her out. i did no longer scream, fuss, argue, or maybe spank (whether I agree that with some teenagers it relatively is the only element that does artwork). the nice and cozy button is for the adults to be the adults and stay on top of problems with the situations as a substitute of letting the youngster have administration and get the adults all labored up. yet like I suggested in the previous - if grandma won't pitch in and a minimum of help the discipline, then the youngster is in for tough circumstances. in my opinion, if the youngster would not could fairly stay with grandma - shrink grandma time till the two youngster and grandma can behave. I did that too with super grandma and have self assurance it did no longer take as long for her to get the message because it did for my granddaughter. After 4 years super grandma on no account rebutes my authority or disciplinary approaches and that i will take this 6 year previous everywhere. and he or she is lots happier and greater appreciative of each thing and all people. teenagers choose discipline as much as they choose foodstuff and water.

2016-10-04 23:15:23 · answer #6 · answered by lininger 4 · 0 0

I don't believe in spanking, especially someone else's child, but you can certainly discipline him. Try a timeout where he has to sit in a corner or on the bottom stair step for a specified time, send him to his room or no dessert. Buy yourself some earplugs until he learns to speak with an "indoor voice." Patience and persistence is the key.

2006-12-06 05:22:16 · answer #7 · answered by Roberta 4 · 0 1

You don't say whether his behaviour has significantly changed since moving in with you. Is it not possible that this little lad is totally bewildered by his new circumstances. He may feel that HE is being punished in some way as his siblings remain with mum. Perhaps you may support your sister in law in some other way. Financially? Giving your time so she can get 'time out' to shop on her own etc?

2006-12-06 05:24:31 · answer #8 · answered by Ross 2 · 0 0

Time out, send him to bed early, Take away favorite program, When he knows your serious he'll behave,

2006-12-06 14:51:14 · answer #9 · answered by queendebadow 5 · 0 0

A good backhand.

2006-12-06 05:55:11 · answer #10 · answered by Casey D 2 · 0 0

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