ADVICE!!! How can I over come my shyness with women???

Question

It’s not that I lack looks or zero to none with my personality. Every time I see a female I like, I become so shy that I end up being tongue tied and my confidence is no longer there.

Even when a girl or group of girls blatantly shows interest, I turn shy and blow my chance, lost for words and no longer able to string a sentence

Help me out here, what is wrong with me???
How do I over come my shyness?

Answer 1

Practice talking to someone that can help you. You have lack of self confidence. It will take practice. You really need help form a good friend that won't make fun of you.It can be done.
Someone helped me once long time ago. Being shy can be so painful. My friends made me talk with guys every day. It did not matter if they talked back with me to begin with. It started with just saying hello. I can only tell you it took a very long time. And I did not date in high school. It was a total disaster. Thank god for wonderful friends who believed in me.
Once you learn to say hello, ask sincere questions. Like how are you? How are you or your family or day going? If they have a bad day, say something like ,"Hey I am here if you need someone to talk to. I am a good listener to. Etc."
Try finding a self help book. My favorite kind is KISS (keep it simple stupid) or Books for dummies series. They have simple solutions and ideas. Also talk with people you have something in common with. That is always best way for you to strike up conversation. Once you learn to talk to people on a regular basis, it will become easier to talk to those women you might like. Remember there will be setbacks. Don't let that stop you. When you fall, pick yourself up just like riding a bike. Practice. Does not make perfect, but it helps to succeed at your goals. Anyway. Set yourself small goals, then long term goals. Try to believe in yourself. God Bless and good luck. I am rooting for you.

Answer 2

Pop 'seduction' into your browser--a little advice from us isn't going to be enough to help, as you have some ingrained bad habits that are holding you back, so go see someone who has helped other men in your situation bust out of it. Short answer is that you need to get better at small talk--you can't be afraid to engage someone in conversation, and you need to consciously work to have interesting things to say that present you as an attractive man. And you need to practice until it is natural--so try going to a nightclub and making friends with as many people as you can and sweet talking ladies (because there are so many people there who will never see you again, it is a great place to practice talking to women without worrying about getting shut down and making yourself look bad). Once you know how to keep a woman enthralled with your every word, you can quit talking to the club girls and meet that cutie at starbucks with more than just confidence--you'll actually have a way to show her how great of a guy you are, without being a silly show-off. Really, you could get out there and make more of an effort and you'll probably do all right on your own. I found that hearing someone break down how exactly how to get a date was so helpful for me--it still took some work on myself and a lot of practice, but it seemed so much less hopeless after someone showed me the possibilities for a guy like me and what I need to do--having an idea what I'm doing made everything seem so much less hopeless.

Answer 3

usu. people who are shy is that they are uncomfortable in a situation. If you are shy when you are trying to meet girls, stop "trying to meet girls" and go do stuff you like that grils will be at. 1. It will give you common ground/interest.
2. conversation will be easier because you can talk about what you are doing and not about you or her.
3. She's probably not there "looking" for a guy either or
4. better, yet she's shy too and also verying interesting just like you probably are so now you have a greater potential of finding a girl who likes what you like, conversation is at least initially on a neutral and safe topic and before you know it you're comfortable enough with these girls to talk without thinking about your uncomfortable feelings and thus will feel less shy. Just give it a try, at the very least you'll get
out and do something you enjoy.

Answer 4

It is difficult to overcome shyness. A nice smile and eye contact is important. Try some small talk about similar interests. Dont push yourself too hard and just do some mild flirting. As you see reactions, try and gain some confidence that people do really want to hear what you have to say and converse with you. I am shy in meeting but once you get to know me I have a tendency to make people laugh and smile alot. Good luck.

Answer 5

Well...from personal experience, the only way to overcome this type of shyness is to meet it head on, meaning confront it and push it away. The same thing used to happen to me when I guy would show interest in me, I would literally run the other way. Whenever, a relationship would turn romantic or about to turn romantic, I would freeze and get extremely scared. I would go from this confident, outspoken person, (which I am usually with everyone) to a complete girl dork.
So, I met this nice guy, was really attracted to him. But as usual, this freezing feeling was starting to overcome my being completely. I consciously had to tell myself to relax and that there is absolutely no pressure. I had to promise myself I will not run from this situation both mentally and physically. As I put less pressure on myself, I became myself again. I treated this person as a friend as we got to know each other better. Several weeks later I surprised myself and asked him out. On our third date, he kissed me and now we're together.
You have to remember that those women who show interest in you are just people like you. Be comfortable around them like you would if you were around your friends, ( not too comfortable). Let them see who you are. "Fake it until you make it"---pretend you are confident until you actually are.

Answer 6

there is nothing wrong with you everybody gets it just in different quantities...i used to be quite shy with boys. i know how you feel but i over came it.these are some of the things i did and i thought it helped, but if you are really worries your friendly doctor.

1. i imagined them as someone else eg your sister etc
2. dress better so you loom a littl emore laid back, that might help you feel a little more laid back.
3. practise talking to some1 infront of a mum etc etc
4.just go for it and be yourself the peson likes you for who you are.
5. when i had my forst kiss from a boy (age 11?) i was really nervous. and that puts you off but once i just went for it well you suddenly realise its not so bad.

i dont know how seveer your case is or how old you are etc but all you need to do is go for it what can you loose?

oh and try going up to people and say hi or nice shirt etc sounds CRAZY but its a real confidence booster! next time you make the first move on a girl they will admire you for it or watch how other people do it!


good luck hun x

Answer 7

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Answer 8

You need to remember that women are nothing special. I know we have boobs and are nice to look at, but at the end of the day, we are all the same species. You get tongue-teid because you build women up in your head as something that is scary. We're not. We may giggle, but thats a good thing. If you want a woman then you have to show that you're confident, we like someone who will look after us and who has the guts to ask us out.

Answer 9

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Answer 10

oh thats a shame! I guess u just need to build up confidence in urself... I'm sure the girls wont bite!
once a girl see's that ur confident she will be intrigued to find out more about you purely because instantly u will be more appealing.

the best thing u can do is throw urself in the deep end! just go over and say hi, my name's... and get on with it! the girl will admire ur guts to just start talking and hopefully u'll get to speak to her with the confidence u need.

on the other hand u could always say hi, i'm sorry i'm normally very shy but i just wanted to say hi and see how ur doing...

i know that if a guy admitted to me he was shy i would probably make my best effort to make him feel confident...

give it a try
good luck and i'm sure u will be fine!