My girlfriends wants to date other women?

Question

My girlfriend is HOT! and I love her. She's mainly sexually attracted to females. She's going to NYU in NYC spring 2008 and thinks it will be the best time to finally explore her fantasy of dating and making love with other girls, as seeing she's in a very liberal and diverse city.

Should I be cool with this? Should I let her explore her sexuality? I know she loves me and wants to marry me. I know I really really satisfy her. We have great sex. Knowing all this, can you answer my questions? Thanks!

Answer 1

let her do it! you might benefit ;-)

Answer 2

Well, I know it's like every guy's fantasy to be with a hot girl who likes other girls, because there's always a chance that she'll "make ou a sandwich," if you know what I mean. However, your girlfriend sounds like she's actually way more into women than men, including you. If she goes off and explores her sexuality at NYU, there's a chance that she'll come back to you, grateful for the experience and ready to settle down with you, but there's also a big chance that she'll decide that in fact she is a lesbian after all, and she may want to leave you for another woman. To me, cheating is cheating, and if I were you, I'd feel the same way about her hooking up with women as I would about her hooking up with men- angry!! You're in a relationship- that means ou're supposed to be monogamous and only be with each other (barring the occasional threesome, of course!) I think you need to reassess your relationship before she goes off to college.

Answer 3

it really depends on how important monogamy is to you. it is possible for the two of you to have a meaningful relationship while she explores her sexuality, but often things end up going sour. you could get jealous of her spending time with women, or she could find a woman that she wants to pursue a relationship with instead of you. i'm not saying that this is definetly what would happen, but it is a possible outcome. also, if she explores with other women, are you allowed to see other people as well? if this is going to work out, you both will need to be completely open and honest about what your expectations of the situation are. if you are having any bad feelings about it, you need to discuss your feelings with her and try to comprimise to find a solution. one way that you can both get what you want is if you both find a woman to bring home with you so you can all explore together, as long as all parties are on the same page it can be a very good experience. best of luck, and thank you for being a supportive boyfriend!

Answer 4

i think somehow ur girlfriend is not completely satisfied with your relationship and in this case it hasn't got to do with a lack on your part. i do believe that once both parties are completely or acceptably satisfied there will be no need to go elsewhere regardless of the gender.

if you believe you can handle any and all repercussions, feel free to let her experience it because i give her points for being honest with you. but not if you are not completely sure that u are able to deal with it in the future for example- bringing it up in an arguement, etc.

some ppl are just a bit more free-spirited than others. she needs to experience this with your understanding and support because once the urge is strong enough she will do it anyway. granted i have never had that urge but i am open minded enough to understand- i have a few female friends who are bi-sexual and right out lesbians and it does not bother me because i know where my sexuality lies- literally!!!

good luck and i hope whatever decision u make will work out well...

Answer 5

Well you can't stop her from exploring women, and if she is doing all this I think that at this time marriage is probably the furthest thing from her mind. While she is explorig you should be exploring with other women that may have your same things in common, and one that is attracted to men. Let the current girlfriend know this too.

Answer 6

Personally if my bf told me he was going away and that he wanted to be able to explore his sexuality with other people I wouldn't be happy at all. How would you feel about this question if she'd have said while I'm away I would like to be able to sleep with other men?!?!?!?!?! The question is exactly the same, she asking for your permission for her to be unfaithful with you. If she wants to have sex with someone else how can she love you the way she says she does.

In my opinion this could be a dangerous situation, you allow her to have sex with other woman, you're left at home waiting patienly for your girl to get this out of her system and come home to you but later find out that she actually loves sex with woman and whoever else she's sleeping with and she leaves you.... nice.... not!!!

Just dont be naive on this one OK. I bet your heart and head are telling you its not right arent they?

Take care now

Answer 7

I think you have a fairly simple choice to make here...

You can support her need to try these things... and continue to love her...

Or

You can deal with her cheating on you later.

She's obviously interested in trying this...and she's going to try to meet her needs, regardless of your support. If you restrict her...she'll either cheat, or dump you. If you really love her... try to be supportive.

As for the person who said something about a threesome. It is possible that you may get to have one. I wouldn't push this idea on her though...let her bring it to you. Many women view sex with a man, different than sex with a woman..and will get jealous if you have sex with another woman. I know, it sounds hypocritical... her point of view will be that she has sex with you, her man...and you're the only one. She has sex with women... and it's different. If you have sex with another woman, you're filling a void with someone else, that your girlfriend can fill. I'd be careful with that one...

Unless of course, you've already crossed that bridge... and then, please ignore my paragraph above. LOL

Good Luck

mj

PS. I have some experience with this.. my girlfriend likes to be with a woman sometimes.... ;)

Answer 8

I think that if you and your girl are secure within your relationship it's then and only then that you should consider making a decision on this.

It sounds to me that, like it or not, she will be experimenting whist at Uni. As long as you don't feel threatened and you know that your girl is committed to you then you might be abe to accommodate this in your relationship but please be aware that a lot of people have tried and failed.

It could be something that brings you closer together but it could also drive a wedge between you so please decide after much consideration.

(On the plus side..........dude!! Your woman is hot and she digs women!! BONUS!!!)

Answer 9

What if she finds a really nice female and she wants to leave you because you don't satifsfy her like "that" of a girl can.
I think if she wants to cheat on you with another girl.. you should just call it off becuase you need to know that your the only one for her and if she wants to explore, she should have done it before or leave you now..

Answer 10

sorry to say but if she loved you and wanted to marry you she wouldnt want to sllep with ANYONE if she wanted to explore her sexuality she should have done so before she got into a relationship some couple enjoy swinging or swaping patners but they do it together your girlfriend wants to do this by herself with you not being part of it in anyway does that not tell you somethimg if i were you id call time on this relationship untill your girlfriend knows what she really wants nothing good can possibily come out of this!!!!!

Answer 11

I am a lesbian I have 2 kids so that shows at one time i had a boyfriend too. a girl knows and feels things about a woman that a man never can , in a way this can be good or bad. If its in her mind that she wants to do it then she probably will whether or not you give your permission. just remember curiosity killed the cat.