I don't know if it truly is depression. Her health is a problem almost to the point of I wonder if she is imagining it but what makes me mad is most of it would go away if she lost weight. Her house which used to be nice has over the last 7 years turned into a pig sty she never puts things away. She no longer will allow anyone into her house b/c she is ashamed of it. My bother and myself have tried to help organize it but she just doesn't do anything. On her days off she is either sleeping or consumed with doctors appts. My brother moved several hours away from us and is no longer to involved with her. I feel like I am carring this burden myself and I have my own life and family to take care of. She askes me to do a lot for her to the point of she now expects it, ie she told someone I would go by there place (very out of the way) to pick something up because she did not want them to come to her house, before she even asked me. I can't take it anymore and don't know what to do.
2006-12-06 02:56:26 · 5 answers · asked by kat 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You're right, I think your mom is depressed. Sometimes we get ourselves to a point where everything seems to have gone so wrong that we have no idea how to get things back. It seems that the slide down has gone so far that the way back is just too hard.
It isn't fair that it is all landing on your shoulders, but then, life isn't fair generally.
Step one. Go to the doctor with your mom and find out is she really is depressed. If this is a clinical depression then she can take medication to help, or she may be offered talking therapy. If she is just really down, then try;
Step two. WITH her, tidy the house. Take photos of it looking nice and give her lots of praise for having achieved something.
See if you can get her to talk about her weight. If that really is a problem, she has to face up to it and decide how she is going to tackle it. She can join a club, she can do it herself, she can do it with a friend, but if it really is a problem, it's one that won't go away without active input from her. Maybe you could give her a gym membership for xmas, or a bike...something that would start the process.
But I'm afraid you just have to keep being there for her to talk to...and telling her to pull herself together is probably not the right thing to say. She needs to know you love her but will not be used. You love her, but she has to help herself. You love her but you also have a life. You love her and will phone every day, (perhaps) and go round when you can, but whatever happens, you love her.
Good luck.
2006-12-06 03:10:40 · answer #1 · answered by super lucky 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sorry to listen to that you're feeling that means. it need to were tough so that you can pay attention that cell name. no longer all is misplaced you and ur mum nonetheless have each and every different and so long as you each recognize that then not anything is unattainable. my mom has a depressive sickness and she or he has many disorders however the truth that her loved ones are at the back of her continues her powerful. preserving up with ur chores and serving to her out across the condominium up to feasible will allow her no that u care and that u are there for her and can take additional pressure off her at the same time she offers with different problems. probably it could be well to invite her if she is fine that means she is not going to no that u overheard the dialog and she or he would possibly confess to you. do u have a loved ones member you'll be able to speak to approximately it who can advisor you and advocate u additional. it sort of feels anything is bothering ur mom and even though u are her daughter u are too younger to be taking all of it on on ur possess u want recommendation and help. i'm hoping it's looked after quickly well success and hold ur chin up :)
2016-09-03 11:33:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your Mom is depressed and her life is out of control. Maybe you should try talking to her about it. Tell her that you are worried about her and want her to live her life and enjoy it. Maybe you could find a service in your area that will pick up seniors and disabled people and take them where they need to go and such. I know we have that here in SC. I know that this can be a burden, but it looks like you are going to have to "wean" her off of expecting you to do everything. You are going to have to be honest and tell her that you just can't do quite as much for her because you are just too busy with your family. It's ok to say no. As I said try to find a couple of alternate choices for her like the senior bus or maybe having someone come in 1 or 2 times a week to do things for her. There are also places like this you could call. Good Luck to you and your Mom.
2006-12-06 05:29:48 · answer #3 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kat, U are sooo burdened by having this to do by Urself..
I shows alot of stength in you... I have similar issues with mine as you... I am considering moving in with her...
I do not know where U are at in life but it seems U have to do the same or move her in with you.... Otherwise you will burn out financially and time wise be exhausted...
There can be some solid benifits for the both of U if U look for the silver lining..... Think about it.......
2006-12-06 03:21:47 · answer #4 · answered by mac50002007 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask professional help,i think she has a problem. let her know that you are there for her and that she is loved and cared
2006-12-06 03:33:59 · answer #5 · answered by james 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋