I mean, how to motivate a man to get up and going, to get some interesting activities to do in life, apart from just TV?
Nagging is dangerous, what are some innovative ways?
2006-12-05 23:41:10 · 15 answers · asked by just me.. 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Okay, I'm going to tell you this, but it's a secret so don't tell anyone else - otherwise we'll have a bunch of motivated happy men around and who needs that eh? *insert wink here*
Find something to praise him about, no matter how little that something is. For the things he does do, SINCERELY tell him how grateful you are and how great a husband he is for doing it.
When you are with others, tell them only of how good he is, never EVER anything bad. This will be hard because you are probably used to putting him down to your friends, and at first, they won't believe you lol. But keep at it.
Talk to him and really listen; find out what sort of things he is interested in (other than the tv of course lol). Then make those things your hobby; you will of course *wink wink* need his help now and then, and this will motivate him like a mouse to cheese to get up off the couch and "help" you.
Does it work? You betcha, 100% of the time!
2006-12-06 00:21:15 · answer #1 · answered by arewethereyet 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can no longer call him a teenager. He became an adult at 18. He needs to be treated as an adult, or he will continue to be a mooch and not care. You need to stop enabling his behavior, accept you had a part to play in it, and make a change. Lay down the law. He has a child on the way. It's time to act like a grown up. That needs to be his motivation. First of all, if he is to stay under your roof, then he is to be out looking for a full-time job. He should no longer be permitted to sleep at all hours of the day. He should be up and out of the house by 8 or 9 am. You should give him a deadline of say 30 days to shape up or ship out. And you have to be prepared to give him tough love. If he does manage to pull his butt off the couch and find a job, then you should talk to him about his finances and require that he bank the majority of his checks. As long as he follows your rules then he can continue to stay at home. If not, then he needs to move out on his own and find out the hard way what it's like to be a grown-up.
2016-03-13 04:00:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is this happening when he comes home from work or is he not going to work? if his not going to work then cancel your cable. if he is doing this after work and its his way of relaxing, then make a plan to do something at lest once a week like every Friday go out for dinner, and then after a while introduce something Else.take it slow you can't go from nothing to a busy life over night. And if this is not what your idea of spending time is then maybe he is not a good match for you. Good luck
2006-12-05 23:51:09 · answer #3 · answered by Lara <:(((>< 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are right nagging is a bad trait.
If he isn't showing a sense of responsability he is not ready for for a relationship.
But if he does pull his weight and he is enjoying his free time watching his television programs then that is his choice.
People have different ways of relaxing some play sport others watch it.
Take care.
Merry Christmas.
2006-12-05 23:47:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Technically you have two choices.
Stay with him or leave him.
If you chose to stay with him, then treat him with respect.
I women needs to be loved.
I man needs to be respected.
Treat him like a king. Whether or not he is worthy of it.
Soon (it could take months) he will want to be a better man and husband to you.
He will want to move the earth for you.
By breaking him down, you will accomplish nothing.
Tell him things like. - I'm proud of you. I know you can do it. You have so much potetial.
2006-12-06 01:25:13 · answer #5 · answered by Louw D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make plans and go without him if he won't go. Either he's changeable or not. If he doesn't mind you going alone, at least you're out there having fun. Hopefully he'll choose to join you.
2006-12-05 23:43:58 · answer #6 · answered by Mrs. Strain 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
D-I-V-O-R-C-E
I don't think you can motivate someone else. The motivation has to come from within. Nagging and threatening him will make you crazy. I know this from experience. You will find that you want and deserve an Alpha male and you obviously don't have one.
2006-12-05 23:52:15 · answer #7 · answered by Mom2six 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He may be suffering from Depression, low self esteem or social anxiety disorder. If so, he needs medical attention. If this is not the case and he is indeed just plain lazy -the sad truth is-he will never change......move on!!
2006-12-05 23:47:16 · answer #8 · answered by MAK 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he tells you he will do something and doesn't, tell him nevermind....you should of known better than to ask a boy to do a man's job. Hit him where it counts.
2006-12-05 23:44:53 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
sabotage your tv set so it don't work, then ask him to do a little bit of work like hanging out a pair of socks to dry, try it, it might work
2006-12-05 23:43:28 · answer #10 · answered by w.m.d's_bro 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋