to end a relationship we had for 3 yrs,he decide to left the country for somewhere else where no body know even his family member,he dont want any one to know .He just want to live money for school of his only son,and even his parents he do not want them to know if is living,and he do not wanna be back.Is this a fair ideas and decision ,because of me...as he told and propose for me to change my religion before we get married,he is islam im not.
2006-12-05 22:01:49 · 28 answers · asked by embe dodo 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Maybe he just needs some time out and he's embarrassed you broke off the engagement with him. It's not really about being fair it's just how he wants to deal with it...however, he is being quite dramatic and I think he is trying to make his family and friends think bad of you but to honest it's not your problem anymore. Let him deal with his family and get on with your own life. And if he was expecting you to change your religion before you got married he should have been more honest with you from the start.
2006-12-06 03:58:50 · answer #1 · answered by roisindu2 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honestly anyone that asks you to change your religion for them, isn't or doesn't really care about you or your happiness. It would be different if you decided on your own without any presuassion from him or hints.
There were reasons you broke off the engagement with him. Aren't those still valid after all of this? I think what you did was right. He does sound selfish. It sounds like he would have been really controlling once you are married or in a situation where you cannot turn to your family or friends for help or advice.
2006-12-05 22:13:59 · answer #2 · answered by blushingivy 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I wonder why you are worried about whether it's fair or not, since it was you who decided to end the relationship. It may be that it's the best decision for you--whatever it was made you end it, now you totally don't have to worry about it any more.
Maybe it's he who didn't think your decision was fair, but whatever, he has decided what is best for him, the best way for him to live without you. It seems in addition to whatever love you had, it also hurt his pride that you dumped him. All we have to do is look at Iraq to see that people's common sense about priorities and relationships, and how to decide the one and end the other, are not the same the world over.
It may be that you should count your blessings. You're not being stalked or threatened.
2006-12-05 22:12:44 · answer #3 · answered by paulb1208 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I believe the decision he has made is very selfish. I also believe him asking you to change your religion before you get married is also selfish. If he loved you enough to propose to you what difference is it going to make to change your religion before getting married? If he loved his parents and his only son he couldn't leave the country and not want them to know where he was or not ever contact them. He needs to understand and find out the true meaning of love! He also needs to love himself before he can love anybody else. Being selfish isn't love. No I don't think this is fair for you, his only son, or his parents. But the truth is most things in life aren't fair. Somebody in every situation feels the decision made wasn't fair. You will find somebody who truly loves you for who you are and what you believe in. Don't ever settle for anything but the best for yourself!
2006-12-05 22:21:14 · answer #4 · answered by michelle 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Find someone else who wants you exactly as you are, and that includes the religion you follow now. If he is sending back money to support his son that is the only contact you need with this selfish man. Good luck with the rest of your life.
2006-12-06 01:21:42 · answer #5 · answered by D B 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stick to your decision, don't go back with him. It sounds like you had good reason to break up in the first place. He is a selfish person. especially if he expects you to change to Islam. Don't do it! If he can cut himself off from his family just think what else he can do!
2006-12-06 03:09:13 · answer #6 · answered by sladelover 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It just sounds like he knows what he wants, which isn't a lot. He doesn't care about everything else right now, just himself, it might change in the future, and it isn't really fair. But it's his decision.
2006-12-05 22:25:34 · answer #7 · answered by Aaron 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
move on with Ur life find someone else he sounds like a very selfish man u will be happier without a man like that and your son to he don't need to learn this bad ways of doing things good luck have a great christmas
2006-12-05 22:17:39 · answer #8 · answered by lora b 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You ended the relationship, so I would say it is perfectly fair for him to decide what he is gonna do with the rest of his life, if you don't want to be with him then why should he hang around and watch you make a new life and perhaps date other people. Of course it is fair for him to decide what he is going to do with the rest of his life. If you don't want to be with him then let him get on with his life, and just worry about getting on with your life.
2006-12-05 22:18:13 · answer #9 · answered by sparkleythings_4you 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The bottom line is it is his decision and whether it's fair or not is really of no consequence. It was his choice to run off which kind of shows you how poorly he deals with conflict
2006-12-06 08:37:05 · answer #10 · answered by Patricia D 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋