My mom died 4 months ago?

Question

and i knew my dad would share my sorrow but then 2 months after the furrnel my dad married again. now how am i supposed to feel about my step mom and all her realtives, and how would y mom fell if she heard me calling my stepmom "mom" plz help

Answer 1

Sorry about that I think your father must have been trying to fill the void left by your mom's departure as quickly as possible. He is dealing with the loss that way, as far as calling your new step mom....Mom, you don't have to and she shouldn't try to compel you.

Answer 2

I suspect that it's what your mother would want if she loved you. I'm sorry about your loss. Call your stepmom what you feel comfortable with for now, I suppose. If she's decent, you might want to consider calling her mom if you can later on.

Two months does seem fast, I tend to agree, but at least this is not a divorce and remarry situation like so many liberals are involved in today.

Answer 3

Well, you have to respect that your dad might not be able to live without a companion. When my grandfather died, my granmother remarried less than a 3 months later, and we were all shocked and appauled. I didn't like him, and I wasn't about to give him the time of day. Until one day, my grandmother sat down with me and told me that she had lived for so long taking care of a man that she couldn't live without it. For 2 months, she still got up and made breakfast for 2, set out slippers, got the paper.. that my grandfather liked to read at breakfast. She needed someone to take care of.. she didn't remarry because she was ready for it.. she remarried because she wasn't ready for my grandfather to die.. and she needed someone.

Maybe it's the same for your dad. Realize that he'd been married for a long time, and maybe he can't live without someone. It doesn't mean he's any less sad, or that he loved your mom any less. But he knew her in a different way than you did.. and maybe he wasn't ready for her to go.. and this will help him cope.

Repect your new step-mother. You don't have to love her, or even like her, but respect her. It will help no one for you ro hate her. You don't have to call her mom, she's not your mother. She'll understand, and so will your father.

Answer 4

Dont call your stepmum mum. she isnt your mum. Call her by her first name. What the other guy said, if she ask's you to call her mum dont.

Sure this might sound a tade harsh but you know that whatever happen she wont be your mum.

And 2 mounths!!!!! are you sure he wasent already seeing her??? That a very short time and i dont think any woman would marry after 4 mounths of dateing (at the minimum).

But any way. It would be wise to think of what your real mum would think. Her relitives (if any) would be family as well. So keep in touch with em.

Answer 5

I am sure that this is hard for you, no one can ever take your mom's place, and it dose seem your dad remarried rather quickly after her death, but you can do nothing about what has happened, so try to make the best of the situation, is your step mom a caring person? dose she include you in the family or dose she try to root you out..?
I am sure if this woman tries to make a home for you and try to make your dad and you happy, then if your mon could speak to you she would want you to be happy.
You can either except this situation and try to be happy, or you can hold to your unhappiness and be bitter the rest of your life.
Life is short at best, make the most of it..

Answer 6

My sincere condolences.

Just call her by her first name. If your dad says otherwise, tell him how you feel. In this world no one can TRULY force you to do anything. The memory ot you mother and how you honor her is entirely up to you. The same goes for your dad.

Your mom is at peace, I'm sure she want you to live the best life you can and not let her death get in the way. Not to say that you can't be sad, just don't let despair rule you.

Answer 7

Take this at your own pace, k? Never let your family force you into prematurely banishing the sorrow. You have to grieve and let it take its time. If you feel uncomfortable calling your step mother "mom", then don't. As long as you're not mean to her or make her feel guilty for anything. But if you're uncomfortable with saying or doing anything, don't do it. I'm sure your late mom would understand and you're not betraying her or anything. But do it only when you want to.

Answer 8

My dad died two years ago in south-Africa and I'm in Australia now with my mum!
i know how you feel! i have a step dad, but at least i knew him when my dad was still here! i wish everyday my dad could be here so i can give him a hug!
im so sorry about your mum, i lost my dad when i was 16, and i felt like life is over to, i realy miss my dad and i was a daddys girl!
may God be with you and enjoy your day!

Answer 9

He is fulfilling the void in his life, she is def a rebound woman. she might know it and might not. He thinks he's in love and in fact he just needs someone to be with. it happens more than you think. All you do is just go along with it, and be kind to her and her family. dont make your dad resent you for being a jerk to everyone. Sorry you lost your mom, sounds like you must morn on your own or see a counselor. Good Luck.

Answer 10

thats an extreeeemely short amount of time to rebound from a death to a marriage, imo. you shouldnt be expected to feel anything but experiencing the greiving process for your loss, sweetheart. you can be expected to accept your stepmother all in one swoop, especially if you just lost your mother. its going to take time to adjust, but provided they arent putting you out in a bad way or anything, id be open minded about accepting the new family as a new addition to your family network and support system- not a replacement for your mother. its up to you whether you want to call her mom or not, but for now id keep that sacred to your mothers memory until youve come to terms with her passing. its ok if you never want to call her mom, too. keep that in mind.