2006-12-05 20:32:06 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
A woman at a party walked up to a man and told him, ''If you were my husband I would poison your drink." The man replied, ''If you were my wife I would drink it.''
2006-12-05 22:10:57 · answer #1 · answered by Mary 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
After a week of this she can't stand it any longer! The woman goes into her supervisor's office and tells him that she wants to file a sexual harassment suit against the man and explains why.
The supervisor is puzzled by this and says what's wrong with the co-worker telling you your hair smells nice?
The woman replies, "He's a midget"!
2006-12-06 05:42:03 · answer #2 · answered by Adele 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One day Sardar happened to see a marathon race.
"What the guys are doing" asked the sardar.
" We are running a marathon. The winner will get prize" replied one runner.
"Only the winner will get prize! Then why others are participating!!" Exclaimed the Sardar
2006-12-06 05:57:16 · answer #3 · answered by mr. x 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes,i have manyof them,some of them are
Going Out
A couple was going out for the evening. The last thing they did was to put the cat out.
The taxi arrived, and as the couple walked out of the house, the cat shoots back in. So the husband goes back inside to chase it out.
The wife, not wanting it known that the house would be empty, explained to the taxi driver "He's just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother."
A few minutes later, the husband got into the taxi and said, "Sorry I took so long, the stupid thing was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out!"
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Is There Baseball In Heaven?
Two old men had been best friends for years, and they both live to their early 90's, when one of them suddenly falls deathly ill. His friend comes to visit him on his deathbed, and they're reminiscing about their long friendship, when the dying man's friend asks, "Listen, when you die, do me a favor. I want to know if there's baseball in heaven."
The dying man said, "We've been friends for years, this I'll do for you." And then he dies.
A couple days later, his surviving friend is sleeping when he hears his friend's voice. The voice says, "I've got some good news and some bad news. The good news is that there's baseball in heaven."
"What's the bad news?"
"You're pitching on Wednesday."
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Three little old ladies
Three little old ladies are sitting in a restaurant one day, talking about this and that. The first lady said, "You know, I'm really getting forgetful. This morning I was
standing at the bottom of the stairs and I couldn't remember if I was just about to go up or if I had just come down."
"Oh, that's nothing," the second lady said. "The other day I was sitting on the edge of my bed, wondering if I was going to bed or if I had just gotten up."
The third lady smiled pleasantly at the other two. "Well, my memory is just as good as ever, knock on wood."
She rapped on the table with her knuckles, then gave a start and said, "Who's there?"
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2006-12-06 05:00:44 · answer #4 · answered by aanu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two Newfies were in Toronto for the first time and they were on a bus. Two nuns got on the bus and one of them had her leg in a cast. One Newfie says to the other "Wa ya suppose appen t'er?". The other one says, " I don know, whyn't ya fine out." He responds, "I will" and goes over to the nun and asks, "Sista, wha appen ta yer laig?" She says, " I slipped, in the Baaath". He goes back to his buddy who asked "wha appened?" and he says, "She slipped in a Baaath", buddy inquires," Whats a Baaath? He says, "Ow da ell do I know, I ain't Cathlic,"
2006-12-06 17:23:27 · answer #5 · answered by iknowtruthismine 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ONE
WOMAN: Sir please teach me how to play golf. COACH: Ok! Now..... hold the club as if you are holding your husband's penis...
No No take the club out of your mouth!
TWO
A man boards a local train carrying 4 beautiful
babies. A woman sitting besides him asked "Oh these are
four beautiful babies are they yours?"
The man looks up "No mam I am a condom salesman and
these are customer complaints".
2006-12-06 04:53:14 · answer #6 · answered by Viren 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
How do you make a dog drink?
Well you first need a really big blender...
Justin
2006-12-06 06:04:41 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋